Hi everyone! This late december night I have been pondering an issue that has been on my mind for quite a long time but i could not really formulate it verbally and it seems the inspiration and right words have found me so here goes my question (its in two parts)

before i start my question i wanted to clear up something- because my question is about destiny and fated events and such- i thought it would be smart to really explain what i mean by that- so the main theme of the question revolves around destiny and fated events- and by this I DO NOT MEAN THE NEGATIVE FATED EVENTS LIKE CATASTROPHES BUT

the 'perfect' outcome we ask our higher selves for: the GENERAL desire- i hope this makes sense, for example i asked my higher self for the perfect job- in order for me to create a minimum of resistance i go general and in stead of heaping up all the specifics and ONLY THAT JOB I WANT- i ask my higher self for the perfect job for me. so thats what i mean by fated or pre-destined- this would mean that there is a perfect job for me and that by certain events that job would be presented to me in the path of least resistance. so just to clear up what i mean by 'fated' so another example would be- me asking for my perfect partner- and assuming that there is one- the universe would line up circumstances for me to get vibrationally closer and closer and finally to that exact perfect partner- so fated in that respect. this would entail that there is that 'fated' perfect partner and 'destined' perfect career for me. i hope that makes sense and if it doesnt please tell me and ill try my best to explain again, in simple words- when i ask for my perfect job or partner- than i am assuming that there is this fated and predestined perfect job or partner for me. that they are meant for me and that are in my path in life and are TRULY perfect for me.

so now to the actual questions. i choose the partner in life as an example- to me its just easier to explain myself that way but this is not only about love but any 'big' life aspect if you will.

the questions:

1. Are events and experiences that are 'meant to be' or 'your destiny in life' - and by this i mean the grander events in life so to speak (so the example of the partner in life i mentioned before) UNAVOIDABLE?

so are these fated and destined and meant to be-events- completely- as the word would tell you- meant to be- are going to BE? for sure for sure? plain and simple- is there a possibility of things that are truly meant to be- to not be?

what is your take on this? do you believe in these fated events? do you believe that they happen no matter what and again, i mean in the perfect outcome way we ask our higher selves- so if i asked for that perfect partner and i am doing my vibrational work and floating in the vortex and truly enjoying my life- i can just trust the timing of the universe to bring me that perfect partner and i know that this is meant to be my perfect partner- and it completely unavoidable for me to be with this perfect partner?

2. second question, this is perhaps the more tricky one (yes as you can tell i was clearly out of the vortex during the thought process of this one)

ok so, i believe that if i am vibrationally in tune, i have succesfully cleared many negative beliefs, i am truly enjoying my life, i have changed everything radically 360 degrees, i have lived and surivived the old battered car-syndrom succesfully and come out of it- i am soaking up each and every second of life in such tremendous appreciation- of course i am out of the vortex sometimes but really thats ok because i built up the confidence and habit of just feeling and feeling my way up there again and i truly believe that i asked for that perfect partner- i know he will come and i know that my physical mind cannot know the perfect timing or perfect unfolding- and i dont even want to know- i trust my higher self completely with that aspect- i truly truly do-

but then this thought came to me:

how about those people that never got their fated events in life- how about those that truly wanted and even not knowing the loa- and that by wanting so much they were actually resisting it- and then when they let go finally- it was too late- they were too old or that perfect partner died or something?? or some commit suicide- i just- i keep thinking of the people that never got that perfect outcome- even people around me like my grandmother for example that i know i my heart wanted love- and she married someone that did not love her back in the way she wanted and she divorced him and for a couple of years she had hope but then grandchildren came and she gave up on love- and she was only 48 at the time- and it never came for her and although she had her children and her career and her grandkids and her farm- still, she never got what she wanted and we talk sometimes and i know its ok now- but i can still understand that this must not have been what she wanted so- what is up with that? sometimes it makes me question my own faith in my higher self- yes i am going round being totally confident that my higher self has all my desires- and me only feeling good about anything will bring me the perfect outcome- i do believe that- i know that- but i still cant explain than these other lives and the people that never got their perfect outcome- and there are so many around us- and so many not around us anymore- what about alllll those peoples perfect and fated and amazing outcomes?

so i think the real question here is- is it safe for me to trust and let go and know that i will have my perfect outcome- because i do and i want to- but when i am not in the vortex this issue here really gets me thinking that- why should i be so lucky and fortunate to get everything that i want when there are so many people that never did?

thank you for your answers, i really look forward hearing your opinions and views on this perhaps- a bit too serious- but nevertheless important question of mine


asked 15 Dec '17, 20:04

Januaryfeelings's gravatar image


This is a question as old as time, although you have worded it in a fresh way: Is there free will in life (many possibilities) or is there a fated or predestined (no possibilities) path for me???

Philosophers have been debating this forever. Sometimes, it seems as though events are fated. We often think this when we see repeating patterns in our lives. Perhaps we keep failing in relationships, and we start thinking that we are "fated" to never love. Or we keep losing money and we think we are destined to be poor. Even mythology accredited our problems to some god or goddess playing with our poor mortal destinies.

But eventually, free thinking souls saw that determined people could "change their fortunes" with effort and yes, free thinking. But this debate rages on, with folks on all sides claiming that their views are correct. I personally do not adhere to the idea that fate is predestined. If we do select a "theme" for our lives before birth, we may have a sort of idea about what we came to do. But I have thought about this a great deal, and the odds of all events lining up on Earth in such a way that everything comes out perfectly as we planned are astronomical. But having a sense of what we came to do does help is point towards that goal; the randomness of all other happenings make everything interesting.

Knowing yourself well helps acceptance. I very much wanted to attend Medical School after I attended High School; I worked very hard to achieve this goal. I was accepted into Northwestern University's Honors Medical School program at age 16. But, as "fate would have it", my parents were not at all willing to support me, even though I won enough scholarships to pay for it, except for a token amount the University wanted from them to demonstrate their support. They refused to pay it, and destroyed my plans. But hindsight is 20/20. I know myself a lot better than I did then. I am so much more of a creative person than a strictly scientific one. I would have felt so confined by my studies, and would have ended up leaving. But it was not "meant to be". Was it fate? I do not think so. As it turns out, I had a powerful desire to have a family and especially be around children. Do I regret not going somehow despite the lack of support? Yes. But could I have done so? I do not think so, because I did not know myself well enough. I needed a lot of support that I never received, including guidance from my parents. They made it clear that I was on my own. This devastated me far more than anything. But after that blow, and this is really, really important: My destiny was in my own hands, and I could have done many things...But I chose to think that I could only do one thing.

So, I have learned that at any given moment, it may appear that I have no choices (fate), but I always seem to see in hindsight that I have always had many choices (free will). Perhaps this paradoxical feeling we have is part of our feeling when we think fate is running the show. But in doing the next right thing, and also having a clear plan for my future, I won't be boxed in by circumstances. This is how that feeling we might have for the future that we bring with us can manifest itself into reality.

Thanks for a great question!



answered 16 Dec '17, 01:49

Jaianniah's gravatar image


edited 16 Dec '17, 01:52

No, no i think i failed at asking my own question, let me try again, your answer actually showed me how i can ask it better-

(16 Dec '17, 17:09) Januaryfeelings

I do not question the existence of fated events/people/etc- i completely believe that THERE IS for sure a PERFECT predestined lets say career for me- i also know that there is a perfect partner for me- carved out of all the asking i have done throughout this lifetime and before- my question is- is there a chance that you could- for any reason whatsoever- not get that perfect fated predestined thing thats meant for you

(16 Dec '17, 17:10) Januaryfeelings

and by commenting on your answer to a question i did not ask i actually got my answer- you cant get it wrong and you never get it done- if you dont get it this lifetime- you can try again- indefinitely because your soul never 'dies' only your physical body does- but your consciousness is eternal and forever- and when you 'die' physically- all those desires that you could not quench in that lifetime- you get all at once so it doesnt matter because- you have like forever to experience everything

(16 Dec '17, 17:13) Januaryfeelings

so going back to my grandma-yes perhaps in this lifetime she did not have the best of luck regarding her lovelife- but who knows in the previous thirty-thousand-and-seventeen lifetimes she was like married happily billionaire husbands that were actually nice people and loved her for who she was and carried her on her hands- so it never ends and in the end it doesnt really matter because- again- your here forever- so its fine if this ONE lifetime something doesnt happen- thats how your soul grows

(16 Dec '17, 17:15) Januaryfeelings

well glad i sorted that out for myself- keep forgetting these major things ughhhhhh :(

(16 Dec '17, 17:15) Januaryfeelings

the actual difference between being in the vortex and out of the vortex and thinking on this topic just blows my mind, god bless the vortex!

(16 Dec '17, 17:19) Januaryfeelings
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Asked: 15 Dec '17, 20:04

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Last updated: 16 Dec '17, 17:19

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