I have learned that most people never take advice, especially unsolicited advice. (I learned that one many years ago!) But I have also found that even when people do ask for advice, they often just do what they really want to do anyway.

So, now I ask people if they really want advice, or just support for the decisions they have made. What do you think?

Blessings, and Happy New Year 2011,


asked 01 Jan '11, 08:41

Jaianniah's gravatar image


When answers are given Isn't also for the benefit of the person giving the answer for that person to express their opinion to make it more concrete. How many answers are complete when you start to give them? An answer grows within the person and is a creation, not only hopefully helping the one questioning but also the the person giving the answer .So by answer your question I am really just answering for my benefit too.

The Travelers answer in @Monty Riviera question about teachers. Giving answers teach us."So you are the teacher that you must follow"
How many questions are answered where the questioner is no long active here? So who benefits from that answer? You and other readers but not the original questioner.


answered 01 Jan '11, 10:09

ursixx's gravatar image


edited 02 Apr '13, 02:38

Nicely said, ursixx

(01 Jan '11, 11:51) Stingray

@Stingray. Thanks Mate ^5

(01 Jan '11, 19:57) ursixx

Not really. There have been a number of members who has asked a number of questions. The contributors keeps asking the same kind of questions. I get the feeling that some forum members havnt listened to any advice given . The reason i come to this conclusion is that there is often a string of questions asked over a period of time, its obvious that some arnt "getting it".They seem to be going over the same ground over and over again. Now that is a wee bit of a generalisation i know. And im also aware that my definition of "getting it" isnt everyones.

I dont listen to advice either, i must be honest. BUT this forum has provided me with the tools or rather sources of information to learn for myself.

I has never heard of "Neville" before becoming a forum member, i had never heard of "Zeland" either. Also "Bashir" and "Esther" have filled in a few gaps too.

I think on balance that we do need to learn for ourselves. Any revelation comes ultimately from within. Perhaps everything ultimately comes from within.



answered 02 Apr '13, 02:53

Monty%20Riviera's gravatar image

Monty Riviera

@Monty Riviera :Did you see that Youtube link I put up about with the deaf lady that got an implant so she could hear again.She could hear.But all she heard was noise and she didn't like it, it scared her.The brain was not used to "noise" .imho Questioners that repeat themselves are still just hearing "noise" their brain(subconscious / ego) has not learned to accept what is "sound" advice.

(02 Apr '13, 03:19) ursixx

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymyt5s0btVk So in a sense yes they learn for themselves to interpret the sounds..

(02 Apr '13, 03:40) ursixx

@ursixx, so you're saying, it all just sounds like "blah blah blah" if you aren't ready to hear it? ;) http://www.inwardquest.com/questions/13323/are-we-giving-attention-to-what-we-dont-want/13326

(02 Apr '13, 16:09) Grace

@Grace about 4 mins into the hearing tech says" Men ,women, dogs sound all the same but that will change" It took as an example our @Monty Riviera 40 years to"focus and attention to that which you want."- See more at: http://www.inwardquest.com/questions/13323/are-we-giving-attention-to-what-we-dont-want?page=1&focusedAnswerId=13326#13326 so yea G

(02 Apr '13, 16:50) ursixx
showing 2 of 4 show 2 more comments

If I ask for advice, I don't necessarily take it. I just want an alternative point of view, and would prefer to consider a few perspectives before making a decision. Hence, it's not possible for me to take everyone's advice since I can only make one decision.

When I get asked for advice, I similarly do not expect that the asker will necessarily take it. And I don't take it personally if they don't go with what I said. Perhaps the key is to be easy about this... whatever the asker's intentions, just give the best advice we can give and let it be.



answered 01 Jan '11, 14:44

Pat%20W's gravatar image

Pat W

Sometimes we need to get feedback to support what we already know whether favorable or not. In the case of Inward Quest, the advice may appeal to anyone who uses the website.


answered 01 Jan '11, 23:29

Drham's gravatar image


It could be a combination of both, but most often people are just looking for a second opinion to make their own decision, and that is okay too, because two heads are better than one, and sometimes the second opinion is very much needed!


answered 02 Jan '11, 02:08

Inactive%20User's gravatar image

Inactive User ♦♦

I will only give advice if asked.

Then preface it with..."I can tell you that this worked for me, your results might be different"

Questions that require choices I believe the questioner has already decided and is looking for affirmation, all others are usually legit. IMO



answered 01 Jan '11, 13:25

jim%2010's gravatar image

jim 10

edited 01 Jan '11, 15:19

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Asked: 01 Jan '11, 08:41

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Last updated: 02 Apr '13, 16:50

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