Out of the Emotional Guidance scale,
I feel that I can go to a Better Feeling Place in a moment or two, for any of the feelings listed, except Anger. I don't know why but I feel confortable there. I don't feel like changing my mood, and I can't, so easily as I do with the rest.
I am trying to change my temper to a less fussy and more laid-back person, but when Anger appears, I feel like 'nested'. I don't argue or shout or say anything. I just want to be left alone, sort of 'cherishing' my Anger...
Why does this happen? And how can I change it?
Anger is a powerful emotion, and many people feel more powerful when they have it. Feeling more powerful means feeling more secure.
Anger can be a driving motivator to accomplish things. You don't have to go far to find stories of people who set up a foundation or charity because they were victimized by an illness or other some other similar problem. In a way, that charity is their response to their personal tragedy, a way to rise from anger to optimism, to take something negative and turn it into something positive.
Because it feels familiar - it's what you've become used to and there is a certain amount of comfort in what's familiar, even when it's not a positive emotion.
Cutting cords to what's been comfortable for us is one of the hardest things to do. We fear living with the dysfunctional emotion but part of us is even more afraid to let it go.
The only way out of the emotion is through it.This means doing what scares you most and that is feeling it fully. This requires being completely honest with yourself - sitting with it, feeling it fully, seeing what the root cause is ( Look at what triggers your anger and it will help you realize what that root cause is ). This probably won't be a one time event BJ09, but it will get easier each time you do it.
You can call in your angels or guides to help you with this or just to be there as a reassuring presence when you face the fear that's causing this. This will also help you bring forgiveness to those you're angry at and more importantly forgiveness for yourself. Good luck, I hope you get to the root of it and after that you'll be amazed at what sprouts :)
answered 12 Jan '11, 17:51
Are you confusing anger with rage? Or going from rage to anger? And I share the feeling of being stuck there when it arises ,sometimes when arises. I feel the bottom of the list is very easy to stay in because they feed themselves and require little thought to change.
answered 13 Jan '11, 13:52
I am signing onto this website late in the game. I just offered my feedback on the spiritual practice book, A Course in Miracles. Your anger question relates to the ideas about the human ego discussed in ACIM.
To understand why anger exists and why we succumb to it, one has to understand the role of the ego in our minds. One bare-bones explanation is that there is God (Love) and there is the human ego (pain, anger, fear). The two, and their worlds, are opposite and incompatible. We (the Course would say "God's Son") choose one or the other. All of us living in the physical world generally equate ourselves, to one degree or another, with the ego, and therefore with pain.
God, being Love, gives love. Therefore, Love would be our basic experience were we to choose only God. However, our minds are divided, and therefore it is very difficult for us to think with God.
On Earth, while we identify with the ego, we are addicted to its gift of pain, which includes anger. Equating ourselves with the ego means that anger and pain feel normal and necessary to us.
The ego doesn't even know that it is pain and that pain is its function and its "gift". Just as God wants to give us Love and have us be Love, the ego wants to give us its gift - pain.
The best thing to do, then, if one feels frustrated with one's anger, is to learn about the ego, and to do spiritual practices - like A Course in Miracles. There are many spiritual practices that are designed to help one understand why and how the ego evolved, its function, and how to undo the ego and return our minds to God.
It's hard work undoing the ego. However, practices like the Course and Zen Buddhism lay out helpful structures for dismantling the ego.
I see nothing wrong with anger as long as you do not become it. It serves it purpose (man I seem to be saying that a lot lately..oh well).
It actually shows progress if you do not stay there.
Embrace every part of you.
Anger Shmanger :)
answered 12 Jan '11, 15:23
Good question. Not sure of the exact answer but i would bet there are many people who look at that scale and can say that they stick at a certain level more often than not.
Anger does seem to be ( emotionally) speaking one of the more visceral and powerful emotions,although not as powerful manifestation wise...unless its a bad manifestation that is.
answered 12 Jan '11, 15:26
It is not the anger that you are comfortable with, it is your way of dealing with anger that you have become comfortable with. If you are sincerely comfortable with the actions that evolve from your anger then you have also contemplated the repercussions and are willing to accept them as well. If not, then open the door to new reactions to your emotional instability.
answered 12 Jan '11, 16:15
Anger is a fear of self control over people, places things. Sometimes we like to "stew", in our anger as a way of getting that control back even when we are wrong. When you are ready, then you decide to let that anger subside sort of claiming that power back. Realize that you have an infinite amount of responses to an event. That is how to claim that power back. Choose the response that will lead to the best outcome. Try to match the emotion to the event. Anger for survival is necessary, anger towards someone trying to help you needs to be directed.
answered 13 Jan '11, 15:40
The Knights Alchemy
Thanks for asking this particular question BJ09, I've found that sometimes I enjoy wallowing in my angry moments as well. Now reading all the replies, it's put a lot of perspective on my reactions.
answered 14 Jan '11, 10:58
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