I have struggled with this question my whole life. I do not know how to deal with people who make up their minds about something, and refuse to even consider anyone else's point of view. Does this mean I think I am right all the time? I hope not. I have encountered some pretty closed minds here where I live, and it sometimes scares me. How do you all deal with it? Or is the trick just to let it go?

Thanks, and Blessings, Jai

asked 14 Mar '11, 04:04

Jaianniah's gravatar image


Being brought up in a very religious family with extremely set beliefs i would say this question resonates with me.

Ive personally gone through a quantum change in my beliefs,but family members are still very much stuck ( as i see it ) in a rigid belief system which seems to have been handed down thru the generations.

Organised and structured religions seem to be the cause of this,although of course they rely on people joining,believing,staying and supporting them.

Fear of hell which is preached by many religions is the key to keeping people to their particular religions viewpoints. Fear of upsetting God can lead to fear of anything that contradicts the believers current belief system.

If your told by ,lets say the roman catholic church,that the "only" way to salvation is thru their rather twisted belief system then its hardly surprising that so many are unable to break free of the doctrine theyve always followed.

Of course a closed mind may not be just the result of a fear of change or of upsetting Deity. It may be a result of the egoic self which thrives on a set of rigid beliefs. The ego finds a great deal of energy and pivitol strength from asserting itsself in relation to a set of beliefs,which are of course the right ones in the egos view.

In my limited experience is almost impossible to spoon feed people a different set of beliefs or ideas. There is an inbuilt human resistance to being told what to do and what to believe by anyone else.

It would seem that even Source doesnt ram its beliefs ( which are after all facts) down anyones throat.It seems we must make our own way and be, to a certain extent the masters of "our own " small universe.

And to a degree see others do the same for theirs.


Ps good question by the way,,,i told you your questions werent boring!!


answered 14 Mar '11, 09:32

Monty%20Riviera's gravatar image

Monty Riviera

edited 14 Mar '11, 11:54

I have 2 people like this in my life just now, although I try to minimize contact with them. Both think in black and white----e.g. love my opinion, or you are an adiot. There is no reasoning with them. When they become argumentative, I just say, "Sorry you feel the need to always be right. You just go ahead but I refuse to be drawn into any drama. Bless you." These are simple sentences but with that, the other person will sometimes soften out of the blue, and even if not, at least you have told them what you will accept. Let them be as they are, but decide on your own how much time you want to spend with such a person and how much of the selfishness you will accept.


answered 14 Mar '11, 05:14

LeeAnn%201's gravatar image

LeeAnn 1

Very wise words, LeeAnn! Thank you so much! Blessings....

(14 Mar '11, 05:37) Jaianniah

My answer to this is simple: we can’t change how others think, as we are all entitled to our own opinions. However, we can change our reaction to what we feel when faced with what we perceive to be opposition.............. Here lies the potential for self growth.


answered 17 Mar '11, 02:21

Susan%201's gravatar image

Susan 1

edited 17 Mar '11, 13:33

Love your answer Susan!

(17 Mar '11, 17:30) daniele

Well said Susan :)

(18 Mar '11, 01:38) Michaela

It is all a matter of perspective, we must understand that there are many that to us have a "closed mind" however to them we are the ones that have a "closed mind." Now the point of matter is can we accept that, that from their perspective we have closed minds?

Example as a matter of perspective, someone spiritually minded may say "I want a house, I'll work at "manifesting" this house and it will be, God will lead me to this house I want." That is having an open mind to the spiritual person. But a more practical minded person would say "I want a house, I need to figure out what kind of loan I need, look for property and hire contractors to build my house." That is having an open mind to the practical minded person.

Now the practical person meets the spiritual person they both talk about their dream home. The practical person says all he is doing to build his dream home, the spiritual person says "why are you making it so hard just give thanks to God for bringing it and it will come." The practical minded person says "what are you talking about this wishy-washy pie in the sky stuff get your head out of the clouds!" The spiritual minded person says "This isn't wishy-washy dreaming, it is real, it works! My dream home is coming! I will have it, I know it!"

From here on pm is practical minded, sm is spiritual minded.

Pm "What a load of baloney, you want something do your self a favor and pick up a hammer and build it!"

Sm "No the universe is my hammer, it is being built right now, you don't understand!"

Pm "I don't understand, I am the one getting my house built while you are daydreaming of your house, good luck with that!"

Sm "No this is not luck it is mind affecting matter, it is the law of attraction and creation, what I put my mind to comes to me or is created for me."

Pm "By who? what on earth are you talking about!"

Sm "I have faith, I know it will be, God will provide it, it is already coming!"

Pm "Well while your house is already coming mine is already being built, I have the plans, the loan and the contractors. Even Noah had to pick up a hammer!"

The following is said to each other simultaneously as each walks away in disgust.

"You just wont accept this!"

"You'll never get my point, will you!"

"Ahhhhh closed minded people! Good bye!"

This shows how both have their own beliefs, both are stuck in what they believe is the correct and only way. Both believe they must convert the other because they are friends and care about each other enough to try to "help" each other see the light of the matter.

This is like a Republican and Democrat trying to change each other, it will not work, neither are right, neither are wrong at the same time both are right and both are wrong depending on who's perspective you view the questions from. So in this understanding they both see each other as "closed minded."


answered 14 Mar '11, 15:17

Wade%20Casaldi's gravatar image

Wade Casaldi

Nice explanation Wade!

(14 Mar '11, 17:17) daniele

I like looking at things from a holistic view, this includes views and perspectives that may counter my beliefs but are equally valid because thy work for the ones that believe them. So if someone hurts me I try to see past the hurt to what is behind that harm, I try to see from their point of view. Many times I am enlightened by what I find there by putting myself in their shoes so to speak. This makes it easier to forgive as well.

(15 Mar '11, 02:04) Wade Casaldi

that's very wise, thoughtful and beautiful!

(15 Mar '11, 07:52) daniele

I understand the point you're making Wade. However, I'd have to say that if one is truly 'spiritually minded', he would not try to force his point nor would he walk away in disgust.

(18 Mar '11, 01:37) Michaela

I just mean both get frustrated, both feel like the whole conversation was fruitless.

(18 Mar '11, 16:13) Wade Casaldi
showing 2 of 5 show 3 more comments

Here is a classic example, and it is an old saying: “You can take a horse to the pond, but you cannot force him to drink!”

The important message here is we must learn to accept each other differences, and similarity!


answered 17 Mar '11, 04:02

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Asked: 14 Mar '11, 04:04

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Last updated: 17 Mar '11, 13:33

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