1. I was ritually abused by an uncle and his cohorts as a child.
2. I developed 29 distinct "personalities" to cope with the abuse, and the craziness of my own alcohol-driven home.
3. When I was a child, I was somewhat aware that I was "losing time", that I was considered "weird" by the other kids, and that there was something very, very wrong with me...to whit, waking up in a new class with a different math book in front of me, a different teacher leading the class, and having no idea where I was or how I got there...
4. I became an expert at hiding my personalities and my dissociation by becoming a fabulous actress and a quick study...
5. The whole system crashed on me when I reached the age of 37. I began "slipping"- by this, I mean that cracks developed in my consciousness that I could no longer explain away. I did remember some of my abuse, and called a wonderful local crisis shelter for women. I received expert counseling.
6. My counselor, whom I shall call "Kay", worked with me and helped me see the parts of me, and to slowly integrate these parts back into my whole being.
7. The process took many years, and I slowly headed towards wholeness and having one continuous memory under the main part called "Jaianniah".
8. This is a vast simplification of what happened to me, and how I healed. I would have to say that I am about 80-90% whole, and this appears to be enough for me to cope with life. I had to file for disability, however, as I am not able to work- yet. I am attending college, and will graduate this December! I have been accepted into a Master's Program in Pastoral Counseling; I hope to pass on what I received from "Kay" and many other fine counselors as I head towards healing and happiness.
9. Three things contributed to my healing: A. Hard work with qualified psychologists and psychiatrists. B. Turning my will and my life over to Christ, and having a personal relationship with Him. C. Losing my rotten, non-understanding ex-husband, and finding new love, and a brand-new future in a fine man who has honored me in so many ways. I only hope that I can be as wonderful to him as he has been to me! He knows everything, and his complete acceptance of who I am has caused me to relax and enjoy my new-found "wholeness".
I hope this helps answer your question. Many blessings and love, Jai
answered 02 May '11, 07:47
Sorry to hear about your situation. There are trained professionals in the psychology field that can help you.
This is something that needs a professional. You will do great and be fine.
Much Love and well wishes on your journey :)
answered 02 May '11, 06:43
My advice is to look for a Matrix Reimprinting specialist. Matrix Reimprinting is an advanced EFT method. I would get an experienced professional to help though. I am doing my own at home and am stalled, I really need to do it. Karl Dawson and Sasha Allenby co wrote a book on it Matrix Reimprinting Using EFTlink text
answered 02 May '11, 12:54
I suggest that you meditate. meditation is the key to contacting your inner self and the greatest source of info on EVERYTHING,,,, and i do mean EVERYthing comes from within. I am a channeler and I help teach medditation tecniques to contact ur higher self. If you need help! I will help , I am actualy on hiates from my channeling because i had such a great experiance and I am still prossesing alot of the info but i used to be hooked on drugs and this kind of adiction is JUST as hard core as any programing you can get. I overcame it and so can you, I am here if you need me!
love n light,
answered 02 May '11, 20:13
TReb Bor yit-NE
i would say do wall gazing and free the mind! meditate observe what is in the mind understand the meaning and put to rest! that is the problem today people mind are like a hardrive that is full of junk and virus! the only way is to clean it and put everything in it where it belongs! then you will have a virgin mind free from ignorance! don't take my word for it experiance it!
answered 21 May '11, 03:36
Read the book The Secret of Instant healing by Dr. Frank Kinslow. Here is a thread with great links in the answers.
Here is an exercise based on what I learned from the book. Put the palms of your hands together and close your eyes. Feel your hands touching, feel the pulse, if they are warm, cold, damp, sticky, etc... Don't name the feelings, just feel them. Don't try to think or not to think, just feel your hands. Do that as long as you need as often as you think of it.
answered 13 May '12, 11:45
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