Hi viewers, my name is sammie, 22. This question is about me and the first and only girl i've ever expressed my feelings for.

She and i attended the same high school, but she was a junior to me. We never met in high school. My school was strictly disciplined that it didn't allow boys and girls to mix up in anything, even though it was a mixed school.

My sweetheart, as i used to call her, has a younger brother who also attended the same school. So i first became a very close friend to this brother of hers. He never told me he had a sister in school until i saw her one day. To be frank, i never thought i would ever have a crouch for her anytime in my life. I know personally that i have a taste and she never attracted my interest back then when i saw her.

But she developed interest in me when she heard about me. What happened? My mates among the girls usually talked about the intelligent guys then. Many of them talked about me but only a few could identify me in person because of my highly reserved lifestyle. Unlike majority of my male colleagues, I usually feel indifferent about 'girls' issues. So i never could say i had any form of friendship with any of the girls. For all the people my classmates talked about, the only person she hadn't seen was me. She decided to lookout for me by asking among the girls who knew me whenever we all come together. When she saw me, she developed interest in me. Never mind, she told me all that. She had nutured the thoughts of being close to me, but never knew how; and she never knew i had a friendship with her younger brother, until i graduated from the school.

The trouble never came until one day after i got addmission into the University, i got a call from her brother, my friend, telling me that his sister had applied for addmission in my school and that i should help her with information she needs before the proposed screening test. Wao! This i gladly welcomed but for the much i loved my little friend.

So we fixed to talk at a night, since night calls are usually free of charge. We talked about serious issues regarding her addmission but only informal when we talked about high school. But still at this time, i never felt like i was talking with a girl.

Afterwards, i started sending her encouragement text messages, with no feelings attached. Sometimes she also replies, expressing her gratitude. One thing i discovered was a similar discplined attitude of my little friend in her. This is when traces of interest for her began to roam my mind, but i was very repressive about such feelings, atleast not for that time.

Wen she came to my school for the test, we met for the first time and the last time even as at now. We barely spent 20min together, she was a shy time. Unfortunately for her, she didn't gain the addmission. It was really very painful to her and ofcourse to me. The only thing i thought i could do was to stand by her atleast till she gets over the rancors of disappointment that flooded her mind. For this, i was now neutrally addressing her emotions with my frequent calls and texts, though repressing my other feelings for her. She found this very kind of me and acknowledged i had shown her love. I knew what she thinks of me, for she sent me a text that revealed this to me which included addressing me as 'her dearie'. This exploaded my 'emotion reservoir'. I felt sorry for myself to fall in love with a girl i never thought would fall for. But i had no reason to resist it, and every reason to accept it because she has such an inward beauty that makes her the BEAUTY QUEEN any guy should bring home to mama. One of the things that drive me crazy is her indiscribable voice. I love to hear it anytime, both dead and alive. So that was how my feelings for her developed.

When i discovered she has recovered from the ordeal, i ceased communicating with her. But after over a period of two months, she came again. This was when we shared our feelings for each other. She told me everything she felt for me, and i also did. But we made a very solid agreement that day: we agreed never to date each other until we were ready for it (that is, with marriage in view). We agreed to remain just friends.

she later got addmission outside my country and went to school. At first we communicated as usual but later she stopped and swiched off her contacts. When she came back after a year, she apologized over the phone and we resumed the moments blis. It was during one of these moments that she told me how she knew me and how she took interest in me. After one of those nights, she stopped and started to avoid my calls. Later she text me that she fells ashamed for telling me what she felt for me. That was the last i heard from her. Right now, i don't know what to say went wrong: is it that she doesn't love me anymore or that something influenced her attitude? Please i need to know what the state of our relationship is now. Please viewers, i need your opinion. ThanksHi viewers, my name is sammie, 22. This question is about me and the first and only girl i've ever expressed my feelings for.

She and i attended the same high school, but she was a junior to me. We never met in high school. My school was strictly disciplined that it didn't allow boys and girls to mix up in anything, even though it was a mixed school.

My sweetheart, as i used to call her, has a younger brother who also attended the same school. So i first became a very close friend to this brother of hers. He never told me he had a sister in school until i saw her one day. To be frank, i never thought i would ever have a crouch for her anytime in my life. I know personally that i have a taste and she never attracted my interest back then when i saw her.

But she developed interest in me when she heard about me. What happened? My mates among the girls usually talked about the intelligent guys then. Many of them talked about me but only a few could identify me in person because of my highly reserved lifestyle. Unlike majority of my male colleagues, I usually feel indifferent about 'girls' issues. So i never could say i had any form of friendship with any of the girls. For all the people my classmates talked about, the only person she hadn't seen was me. She decided to lookout for me by asking among the girls who knew me whenever we all come together. When she saw me, she developed interest in me. Never mind, she told me all that. She had nutured the thoughts of being close to me, but never knew how; and she never knew i had a friendship with her younger brother, until i graduated from the school.

The trouble never came until one day after i got addmission into the University, i got a call from her brother, my friend, telling me that his sister had applied for addmission in my school and that i should help her with information she needs before the proposed screening test. Wao! This i gladly welcomed but for the much i loved my little friend.

So we fixed to talk at a night, since night calls are usually free of charge. We talked about serious issues regarding her addmission but only informal when we talked about high school. But still at this time, i never felt like i was talking with a girl.

Afterwards, i started sending her encouragement text messages, with no feelings attached. Sometimes she also replies, expressing her gratitude. One thing i discovered was a similar discplined attitude of my little friend in her. This is when traces of interest for her began to roam my mind, but

asked 07 Jul '11, 18:04

Sammie's gravatar image

Sammie
314

edited 08 Jul '11, 10:17

Asklepios's gravatar image

Asklepios
(suspended)

Are you the guy or the girl? If you are the guy, maybe she does not know what your feelings are? Maybe you did not communicate her that you are also interested in her? Please be more precise!

(07 Jul '11, 18:11) Asklepios

Can someone explain the close vote? It's cool if relationship questions are off-topic; I just didn't think they were.

(07 Jul '11, 22:32) Vesuvius

Yes I agree Vesuvius this is an honest and valid question from a girl truly seeking our help. As a matter of fact it seems I am the only one to have voted for her question so far. This girl needs our help, not to have her question closed before she can get that help.

(08 Jul '11, 02:34) Wade Casaldi
showing 0 of 3 show 3 more comments

I will tell you what I think about this. My heart was broken so many times that I feel I should give you the most sincere and helpful answer I can think about.

But we made a very solid agreement that day: we agreed never to date each other until we were ready for it (that is, with marriage in view). We agreed to remain just friends.

She is not happy about this. Maybe she was at first, but not in the long run.

When she came back after a year, she apologized over the phone and we resumed the moments blis.

You made her wait too long and killed the attraction as well as emotional connection. A year! Honestly, I would like to hit you right now. But well, the fate already hit you.

It was during one of these moments that she told me how she knew me and how she took interest in me. After one of those nights, she stopped and started to avoid my calls.

This confession was another way of saying "goodbye" as she gave up on you.

Later she text me that she fells ashamed for telling me what she felt for me.

She feels stupid. She feels like she had lost her pride. She feels betrayed by you. She expressed her feelings yet you never gave her the true love she always longed for. You have to become aware that she does not have the access to your head and does not know what you are thinking. She does not know that you care.

Love is not something you can deal with the same as with other issues in your life. Love is not something you can plan and postpone. You have to experience it in the present moment and be happy about it.

You can still win her over, but you have to put your heart into this. First, unless you change your understanding of love, you can forget about her. Second, in this stage you cannot do any good with text messages or phone calls. You have to see her face to face and talk with her very openly. Tell her you are sorry for being so cold and not understanding. Make her feel the chemistry again and never make her feel so betrayed again. Meet frequently.

But if you are going to continue with your old approach, forget about the girl. You will only make her suffer. If you cannot change, but love her nonetheless, let her go.

Sorry for being harsh but I can see myself in you. I see what I really hate about myself, and that is emotional aloofness. Love does not like waiting, brother. Love is like a fragile flame and you have to provide it with wood very frequently. When you love, you should not think and plan, but feel.

Go for it! If you make haste, you will be happy with her and she will be happy with you. I believe in you (that is, if you make haste... if you do not, well... I am 100% sure you will lose her).

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answered 08 Jul '11, 10:08

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Asklepios
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edited 08 Jul '11, 10:13

Did the guy express his love as well? Perhaps she is just embarrased to having confessed first or perhaps she thinks he doesn't lon her as much as she does??

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answered 07 Jul '11, 21:08

I%20Think%20Therefore%20I%20Am's gravatar image

I Think Therefore I Am
5.2k11389

Okay since you are the guy I can answer with logic like us guys like anyway. :-)

You both seem to have feelings for each other. Now the thing is to not split apart then you two will never get together. There should be some kind of planing between you, keep communication open.

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answered 07 Jul '11, 18:33

Wade%20Casaldi's gravatar image

Wade Casaldi
36.3k21695

edited 08 Jul '11, 04:44

I WILL answer later. In the meantime, i will be praying for you...love hurts! Jai

(07 Jul '11, 18:38) Jaianniah

The girl is not in love, for love knows no shame.

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answered 07 Jul '11, 20:45

you's gravatar image

you
5.2k447

So, are you the innocent Guy that is now in distress, because this girl feels ashamed for confessing her love for you?

Well calm your troubled mind, “for true love will always stand the test of time.”

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answered 08 Jul '11, 04:23

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