i have a boyfriend with whom i broke up recently due to social and cultural differences and we could not marry. I love him and he loves me very much too.
Later i discovered the Law of Attraction, so i started to practice but i could not get positive results on our marriage working out, although i have been able to attract him back into my life.
Our family has been very negative about our relation, how can i turn that using LOA. Plz suggest.
Your anticipation of their behavior must change within you, regardless of how they have behaved in the past and may behave in the future.
Consciousness has a behavior that is hard to convey in a proper example but it can be compared to making a tie & dye or batik pattern on a cloth.
When you create a tie & dye pattern you tie off sections very tight or as in batik, you apply wax to sections that you do not want to be colored and you dip the whole thing in a vat of dye (color)
When you unravel the result the sections that you tied off or waxed off avoid the die and remain free from the influence of color.
Consciousness, to a certain extent is like the vat of dye where the ideas that are alive in our collective consciousness keep boiling with energy like a pot on a hot stove.
They permeate into every empty gap within our minds if we are not taking responsibility for our intent and beliefs.
We become listeners of thoughts instead of thinkers of thoughts.
We have become possessors of a reactive mind instead of an active mind, and yet the energy is set in motion in the ACT of thought and not in the grasping or the reactive embrace of a thought.
Unfortunately the moment you embrace a thought "when a thought POPS in your mind" it changes in an instant from a reactive observation of a "foreign" thought to an active obsession of the same though from a first person perspective.
When you choose to be familiar with silence, you educate yourself about choice of thought.
You choose to be familiar with the realization that for the most part thoughts "occur" to us instead of we being the initiator of them.
By this method you can choose your parent's reaction through your anticipation by deciding on how they exist within your mind.
YOU can make the choice for them through your anticipation.
But it will work only if you don't second guess your own power.
In choosing your parent's reaction within your own consciousness you are forming YOUR reality and not your parent's reality.
So you are not breaking any natural laws here.
You anticipation of their behavior toward you becomes the ties or waxed off sections on their fabric of consciousness.
Most of our communication is psychic.
When you interact with them (and the universe) you are fully immersed in the vat of dye in the form of unlimited potential as perceived from within consciousness.
They may have all this "Intent" towards you as to how you should behave according to their wishes, however it only works in that direction if YOU are also a willing participant in accepting their ideas and wishes.
On the other hand, if your side of their wishes has been blocked off by you, not allowing that energy to take hold within your own consciousness by refusing to anticipate their authority within your perspective, their energy (dye) cannot color your reality because it cannot take hold.
They can only do to you what you anticipate within your own imagination.
Their wishes have to also exist within you for it to take hold.
Your description "My family has been negative, how can I turn it around?" is in a way an acknowledgement that right now they have the "upper hand" in deciding the nature of the relationship between you and them.
"How can I turn it around?" is the key to the whole equation.
That statement is an energy block or an energy balancing formula.
On your parent's side of the equation, the formula is something like "Our wish is your command" and on your side of that equation the formula is balanced by your statement "How can I turn it around?"
But the whole formula exists within YOUR consciousness.
Your parent's really don't have this power over you other than what you give them WHITHIN YOUR OWN CONSCIOUSESS.
With the statement "Our family has been very negative about our relation" you give YOUR power over to THEM to do as they wish with regards to this particular situation and you crush your own potential to fix it by releasing or draining your power through the statement "How can I turn it around?"
"How can I turn it around" is "I can't turn it around", in disguise.
And it keeps "They are negative about us" in balance.
And this whole equation exists within YOUR consciousness.
It only works in their favor because it exists within YOUR consciousness.
Your acceptance that this is true is what allows them to have this power over you.
If you stop the existence of this equation within YOUR consciousness it will slowly fade out of existence because their desire (dye) will no longer penetrate into the area that you have tied off by choosing what YOU want with regards to their relationship with you.
YOU decide the anticipated outcome instead of letting them decide what YOU ANTICIPATE about them.
Their influence only works because of the existence of their influence within your anticipation.
If you want a clear understanding of this through real working examples, rent (or buy) Cesar Millan's videos on dog psychology titled the "dog whisperer"
The way we interact with each other is no different from how dogs pickup our anticipation within this shared matrix of consciousness.
Mastery in the Law of Attraction is of no use without understanding the power of your own anticipation.
With your anticipation you will un-do most of what you attract with intent and focus.
If you find yourself saying "I have envisioned a positive future with my parents but they are still negative and are refusing to change" then you do not fully understand how the Law of attraction works because you are not taking the influence of your anticipation into consideration.
Your seemingly inconsequential statement “but they are still negative” is still YOUR CHOICE OF ATTRACTION OF HOW YOU WANT THEM TO BEHAVE TOWARDS YOU.
"And they are not changing" is a description of the present and the future with regards to your relationship with them.
By this description “And they are refusing to change” you have set a sequence of events in energy where your anticipation will continue to attract an outcome within the un-ending eternal now moment where as long as it is “now” they will always , within that moment, refuse to change.
Even if they want to change, it is in direct contrast to your own inner anticipation of them refusing to change, and so whenever they encounter your company, your inner anticipation will push that back towards a position of them not wanting to change.
Others can only do to you what you allow them through you own anticipation of their behavior.
As long as you anticipate them not changing they have to psychologically push past the barrier of your inner anticipation for them to change in-spite of your anticipation.
But here is a secret that has not been revealed to the masses to the best of my knowledge.
This information is known and exploited to the maximum by those who know how this works.
But it is not common knowledge.
You can be the architect of the content of their consciousness with regards to how they think and feel about you.
You are already doing this every day at every moment of your existence, except you are not aware that you are using your mind this way.
And just like trying to master the art of attracting some “THING” by using your power of concentration this realization will take some effort on your part, because you have to choose a specific target to concentrate on for you to discover how it works.
You can use your parents as your target subject to discover this power.
First start silencing your mind to slow down the continuous chatter of your mind.
You have to get to a point where you can observe you own thoughts so that you can see what is happening.
Once you are able to catch yourself thinking a thought, observe all the thoughts that concern you, your friend and your parents.
Carefully examine the nature of your anticipation.
When you go to see your parents what are you anticipating?
What do you see them saying to you in your imagination?
The experience that you anticipate is the energy foundation from which thoughts “Pop” into your parents head when you meet them.
Their behavior toward you is a combination of their personality as you know them from growing up with them and their minds psychic connection to your minds anticipation.
They are essentially, unconsciously, living up to your anticipated reaction towards you.
If you find this hard to believe, put it to the test.
But for the highest success rate you have to keep this a secret from everyone around you including your friend.
Go into a silent meditative state and create a new behavior by your parents that is slightly accepting of your relationship.
Don’t make it a drastic change.
Make it something small like accepting to go out with you and your friend to the local mall, a dinner, a movie, or something similar that they haven’t done with all of you together.
Envision such an event in the best situation possible where everyone is laughing and have a great time with each other’s company.
Play this scenario in your mind again, and again, and again, and again…..day after day each day in meditation until it is effortless in your imagination.
When it’s no longer a stretch of the imagination, that’s when you have begun to believe it.
If you find yourself saying “I’m not sure if this is going to work, you don’t know my parents” then you are not ready yet, because you don’t believe it.
Once this vision effortlessly unfolds in your mind as totally normal, go ahead and visit your parents, and say absolutely nothing about your mind exercises and meditative preparation.
But instead believe this for your self “I am in command of the opinions my parents have about me for my consciousness controls their unconscious behavior towards me”
Repeat this and believe it within yourself while you are in their company.
And keep thrusting you vision of their new openness and acceptance of your relationship every time you look at them and talk to them.
See yourself taking control of the room and the general atmosphere of their household.
Believe it and command it in the name of the spirit.
IF you believe in God or a higher power, see yourself commanding this higher power to take control of their consciousness and spirit and change their behavior towards you as you interact with them.
The greatest leaders in the world and those in the highest reaches of power have always known this secret.
And that secret is that YOU decide what others think of you and how they behave towards you.
You have always been the one with the power, not them.
When I say you I mean each and every YOU.
The universal YOU.
IF you apply this principal with confidence and a sense of invincibility, you will find to your surprise that you can change other’s behavior towards you.
But don’t use it to abuse or bully others. Because the terrible truth is that you can abuse this power.
You can intimidate with this power.
But you will pay a price.
If not right away, eventually you will.
Because this is an attractive power.
If you use it for intimidation you will attract more opportunities of it until you eventually meet you match.
So use your ability to influence universal consciousness and everyone’s unconscious reactions only towards a positive experience that involves you and them.
This technique works.
Now you can argue and debate about if this is really possible or you can test it for yourself and stay with it until you discover that it works.
Why it works this way is up to debate.
I can only theorize that perhaps it is possible to influence people this way because we are primarily too lazy to formulate our thoughts with intent.
So we have become “followers” within consciousness.
We simply follow the thoughts that involuntarily “pop” within our consciousness and don’t examine why we ran with that thought.
Because most people by nature are followers, you can choose to lead their consciousness in the direction you want whenever you interact with them by deciding for them what they think of you and with you.
This is what happens when a charismatic public speaker takes the stage.
The speaker lends their point of view to the audience.
Strangely this is what we do when we interact with others.
We unconsciously broadcast our inner perception of how others see us and think about us on a psychic level.
Anyone interacting with us unconsciously aligns with that self-perception (that we have about ourselves) and behaves accordingly to “manifest” or “live up” to the other side of this relationship so that our own self-perception is materialized as an experience.
So for example if you have a self-perception “everybody hates me”, whoever interacts with you unconsciously gets the impression “I hate that person” pop into their consciousness and they simply let that perception then grow into a more specific reason for hating you by sharing randomly occurring comments and thoughts that also just “pop” into their heads while they interact with you.
All the time they are simply lazy to examine the nature of these perceptions that occur about you and they just let the words flow effortlessly not realizing that their casual conversation about you is causing you distress.
Their random comments are connected to your own self-perception about yourself, especially in the form “people think that I am…………” or “I don’t understand why people ……………… towards me”.
For the most part, our own consciousness is the starting point for other people’s perception and behavior towards us.
It is we who decide how others treat us in our interaction with them.
OUR consciousness determines THEIR unconsciousness behavior towards us.
If you believe that the shoes you are wearing today are ugly, it won’t be long before someone causally points out that your shoes are “odd” or “strange” or “were they on special?” or just simply “they look ugly”
We are the initiators of that behavior and response towards ourselves.
On the other hand if you wear the most inappropriate footwear to work and build a strong and powerful perception that your choice of footwear is perfect for the job you will find people helping you “materialize” this perception with their casual comments towards you like “Hey interesting choice of footwear, that looks comfortable” or “Wow I wish I had remembered to wear those today, that’s a great choice”.
Because most people are by nature followers, you can choose how to lead them in their consciousness with regards to their opinions about you.
But you don’t even have to actually approach it that way at all.
Examine you own self-perception about yourself and the way you describe yourself.
Everyone that interacts with you unconsciously lives up to materializing that very self-perception you have about yourself.
So to fix other’s behaviors towards you, you actually have to fix your own perception of you.
For that is the source of their unconscious behavior towards you.
You can tell them “’don’t say that about me for it is not true” However after pointing this out to them if you silently fear that they still might treat you the same way your fear will still prevent them from changing.
For they always unconsciously live up to your own perceptions and fears.
It is only when you fear that somebody might harm you that the opportunity to be harmed becomes an available experience where the universe can find a suitable volunteer to harm you in the way in which you imagine being harmed.
Now you can take this information and actually start testing the truthfulness in it by experimenting with the content of your present consciousness and its attractive effect in the reality that surrounds you.
Or you can waste your time and everybody else’s time by asking more and more questions such as “Well if this is true then how do you explain the harm done to young children that are not able to think such complex thoughts about themselves?”
Because while I don’t have an answer to that question, It doesn’t change the fact that your own consciousness DOES affect how other’s behave towards you, because you can experiment and verify this for yourself.
You can discover the truth in something with one well applied experiment instead of analyzing it from every angle with a thousand questions.
So it is ultimately up to us to decide if we want to be at constant battle with the reality that is faithfully living up to our inner point of reference by trying to fix the result of the problem instead of the source of the problem.
If we are trying to fix their behavior towards us it is a losing battle for we are trying to fix the result of the problem and not the source.
If we first fix the source which is our inner anticipation of their behavior towards us which again is rooted in OUR belief about THEIR perception of ourselves, then follow this with fixing the previous result of our inner perception, which is their actual behavior towards us, you will find that you can finally change things around.
And when you figure this out you will find yourself full of this new excitement of now finally really getting what this “Law of Attraction” is all about.
You will find yourself wanting to grab everyone and scream at them “Don’t you get it; IT IS YOU that is choosing what is being done to you”
It all comes back to KNOW THY SELF.
You are not just the person.
You are the point of reference of the universe as seen from where you stand.
And this point of reference called YOU extends its influence called “ME” from where YOU stand to the edge of reality in every direction.
This point of reference called YOU affects everything and everyone with reference to that YOU to fulfill that point of reference of YOU.
The “Myself” that you know is and individual “Myself” and a universal “Myself”
Whatever is perceived at the individual reference of “Myself” is then brought into alignment with the assistance of the universal “myself”
What the individual YOU perceive is reflected back to you with the assistance of the Universal YOU through the participation of every component of the universe that is in alignment with that perception.
This is the Law of Attraction in operation.
It is not just about attracting dollars and lifestyles, although it could be just only that if that’s all you are interested in.
With everything in your mind you are attracting “the experience” of that which is in your mind.
Notice what you are complaining about.
That’s what you are attracting because it is the physical counterpart of your perception (complaint)
Notice how you speak about or believe about others behavior towards you.
The universe has to now FULFILL THAT in a physical form so that you can “experience” or “live” that perception into reality.
NOTHING THAT YOU COMPLAIN ABOUT CAN CHANGE FOR IT HAS TO "LIVE UP" TO THE PHYSICAL VERSION OF YOUR COMPLAINT.
What’s in your mind now is the preview of the physical experience of what you are attracting next.
So whatever you complain about NOW will continue to physically materialize in your life until you decide that you had enough and stop its existence within your consciousness.
If it exists in your consciousness now the physical experience of that experience is soon to follow.
Only you can stop it by destroying its existence within your consciousness.
If you get this you will understand the danger of exposing society to horror in the form of entertainment.
We are truly living in the devil’s playground these days.
Just look at what passes for entertainment these days.
But you can change that by changing YOU.
Changing the individual YOU is the key to changing the universal YOU.
You can change other’s behavior towards YOU by changing the individual perception of YOURSELF.
Use this change as an opportunity to have fun with it rather than be afraid of all that is negative.
Embrace and celebrate the realization that YOU can change those around you just by changing yourself.
And have fun with it.
I had an entire section inserted here about audio trascripts from the book Seth Speaks.
However after listening to all the links that I posted I realized that what I always ignored as being irrelevant may cause much discomfort to a large portion of our participants here.
So I decided to delete the entire addendum. It is much easier this way.
This answer is marked "community wiki".
The informative answer to this question is way too easy..... The difficult part will be actually utilising your thoughts (this is the ONLY work you have to do).
How to mend disastrous relationships (including with yourself)
And the answer to this question is conscious focus. On what? On anything good about the 'targeted' person. All you have to do to work this out is get into The Vortex!!
Let quickly me explain.
LOA is simply: like feelings amplifying like feelings.
Now the issue is this (from what is sounds like); your parents and related family disapprove of a marriage with your partner.
Whenever a rocket of desire is launched, it is launched with a slight little catch: when this desire becomes reality, it must fit into harmonious conjuction with all your other desires.
The solutuion is this- appreciate whatever you can about your parents. Now surely, surely, there must be ONE things you can appreciate. Focus Blocks and focus wheel are created in order to go from good feelings to bad quite steadily.
From personal experince, the LOA is 100% spot on, and, once you understand it, you can really start to see that your beliefs and thoughts are what's in charge of your destiny.
At work a few months ago, I had an abusive boss. She made my life so miserable...I dreaded going into work because of her. I picked up a copy of Abrahams The Vortex book, and then did this exercise; i appreciated 2-3 things about her, and my feelings around her changed. It was hard to start, but once the swing gets going it's sort of hard to go backwards.
Let me tell you, my life changed once I appreciated her. In such a heavenly way.
Well, it just so happened that around that time I had injured my heel at gymnastics, forcing me to take a week off of work. At this time, going to work wasn't dreadful because of my boss- I had gotten accustomed to my high vibrations surrounding the topic of her that work was now a more 'neautral' thing in my life.
But I tell you what, this story is amazing....
When I got back from work, fully healed from my injury, it was quite a humurous shock to learn that she had been transferred to another shop! And I now had a new boss, a beautiful, 22 year old woman who is now currently one of my best friends! I actually LOVE going to work now! And guess what, my old boss even gave me a phone call recently wishing me a Merry Christmas, and also to apologise how rough she was on me.
This was a huge pinnacle point in actually seeing that this stuff works very quickly!
Don't predict how your fairy tale is going to end, that's not your job. You just have to feel good; start appreciating your parents and family if they are the issue.
Whenever there is a bully or someone annoying or abusive, all you have to do is appreciate them. Quite different thinking compared to the untrained mind, but it's the truth! A lot of people really hate to hear that, and are probably disgusted with the idea of thinking good about someone they hate. But hey, 95% of the time they don't do it, and isn't it funny that they keep getting problems from this person and nothing seems to change for the better?! Oh I find that so funny now hahahaha!!!!
Enjoy. It may be hard to do but trust me it's more than worth it :)
How does the law of attraction operate in this case?...well the negative reaction of your family, plus your own attitude towards the situation is leading to a difficult situation. If nothing changes then the situation will remain the same. We cannot directly change others but we can change ourselves. Change any criticism and negativity that you may be feeling and start doing useful and positive things towards your family, offer to help, give small sincere compliments when the situation arises, in brief, be positive towards them. After a while your family will see you in a different way and start to treat you in a positive manner.
In my opinion, others have their free will and their own path in life. You can't always sway others, realistically. I know that some believe each of us is in their own private universe and that each controls it, but most of us are not that adept yet, and are interacting with others, who have their own ideas about things. You may have to make a choice between this relationship and your families if you are unable to smooth things out.
But it wouldn't hurt to approach these people at your meditative level, and talk to them honestly about your happiness. Reason with each and ask their blessings if they can find it in their hearts. You are not interfering with their free will, just pleading your case at a level where they may possibly be swayed. It is worth a try. Hearts and minds can change and I have certainly seen that in my own life.
answered 15 Aug '11, 13:05
You cannot change other people to your way of thinking, if they are not in agreement with you, but you can be a role model for your self, and just maybe others may want to joint you.
Another thing to keep in mind is: the LOA can work for you or against you, so be careful of what you wish for?
answered 16 Aug '11, 03:06
Inactive User ♦♦
I think this isn't for Law Of Attraction it is more for Nero-Linguistic-Reprogramming or Hypnosis. I think if they go to hypnosis or NLP maybe even Thought Field Therapy or Emotional Freedom Technique this would help them change how they feel about you and make them more able to accept you into their family.
Also they might want to try The Sedona Method instead, there are many therapies they could try to help them be accepting and change their ways.
answered 21 Aug '11, 17:37
Do not worry how well your family recioves him. When you get upset and imbalnaced when they do, it will only add to teh neggitivity. The BEST way for them to acept him, is to show them how well you live with him in your life. How happy u are, how hhappy u both are, and if they love you, they will see this change within you andf be happy he si a part. L.O.A. has NOTHING to do with making others happy,,, it has to do with you being happy, attractuing that happieness back to you, and accepting teh free will of others.
love n light
answered 09 Dec '11, 13:13
TReb Bor yit-NE
If you love him no other questions will be asked.
answered 10 Dec '11, 07:16
If you are seeing this message then the Inward Quest system has noticed that your web browser is behaving in an unusual way and is now blocking your active participation in this site for security reasons. As a result, among other things, you may find that you are unable to answer any questions or leave any comments. Unusual browser behavior is often caused by add-ons (ad-blocking, privacy etc) that interfere with the operation of our website. If you have installed these kinds of add-ons, we suggest you disable them for this website