Why am I feeling so hurt when my motive was to help, and nothing more?

Because you care about having the approval of others. When you give that up, it won't bother you anymore what anyone else thinks about your opinion :)

I'm not sure I share the point of view you are expressing here, Jai.

Words like Problem Children and Trolls seem to be quite judgmental ones. Sure, there are people that come on here occasionally from time to time and launch general tirades of abuse just for the fun of it (and it's obvious when it happens) but I would never classify a genuine expression of opinion as being a problem.

What you consider as an off-the-wall answer might just be what someone else needs to hear :)

Hello Jai, why do you even feel that you or anyone else needs to deal with any other member? If you or any community member does not like any particular question or answer because it doesn't resonate with you, you can simply choose to ignore it, can you not?

What controversy are you referring to anyway? Surely, we're merely a group of people asking and answering a variety of questions and answers to the best of our ability, no?

Re-read your question and be brutally honest with yourself and you will see that it is full of judgment.

You are feeling bad because someone else has performed an action which, in your estimation somehow makes you feel less than you did before. Look into the idea of who it is that feels bad and you'll be on the right track to moving beyond feelings of inferiority.

The first thing that came to my mind is stop "focussing" on it i.e. seeing this as an issue and start focussing on what you want: A supportive Inward Quest community.

Being a sensitive person myself, I can understand how you would be hurt. But remember, there are many many reasons you could receieve a down-vote.

1. The person is having a bad day and is just feeling negative (for any reason.)
2. Your tone wasn't properly conveyed....a common problem with written responses; they can be interpreted incorrectly very easily. (You can't see the person's face, their gestures or etc. Their meaning can be taken wrong)
3. The person doesn't want to hear what you have to say, and no matter what you wrote it would be wrong.
4. The person already has the correct response in their mind, and anything other than that will be a down-vote or considered incorrect.
5. The person is feeling mean or vindictive.
6. The person hits the wrong arrow and doesn't notice it. (as I once did)

I would not automatically assume ill intent, since some of the possible actions are not intended to be hurtful. And for the other possibilities, I would not care. I would chalk this up to "the other person's problem" and let it go. In the big scheme of things in this universe it is really nothing! "You are loved and all is well" ( from Abraham )

the simple answer is that some people do not understand or fathom you. and the more that you grow the more that you are set appart from other people. i tell you many will ear you but will not understand. it is not your fault. and many will judge you but if what they say is not in you then it is in them. do not judge or you will be judge with the same mesure. experience and enjoy.

Maybe it would help you if you would acknowledge that you don't have all the answers and that not everybody has to agree with what you believe to be true?

Maybe the feelings that you are akcnowledging while others disagree with you are YOUR feelings and that YOU are responsible for them.

If you think that acting "spiritual" makes you better than all the others that are still not seeking any higher truths, no matter if on this site or in your day-to-day life, than you might want to ask yourself why is that.

Taking a spiritual path, in my opinion, is for the purpose of freeing yourself from the need to impress or to be acknowledged by anyone as who you truly are. You just do it for you and noone else.

That's not about being selfish but about letting everyone choose their own way.

Just because you are an activ memeber on this forum doesn't give you any special rights to criticise others.

Sure, you can do it, you can talk about what you feel and why you feel this way, but it's your responsibility, as any other person, to realize that it is YOU that is causing all this mix-up in you.

If you want to blame others for how you feel, be my guest, but it's a dead end.

One spiritual teacher said once "If you're not pissing people off you're not doing a really good job."

What that means, in my opinion, is that by pissing others off we are letting them acknowledge and change things about themselves that they do not prefer instead of forcing anyone on the outside to change because YOU thing that's how it should be.

Or maybe not. Maybe you are right and I am wrong. Either way, hope this answer pisses someone off to the point they can downvote me :) That would be such an accomplishment!

If you really come across a Troll (7r0££) the best thing to do is follow rule14 (Do not argue with trolls - it means that they win.) and that's also good advice for the trolls that come from within too.
peace

What I have learned here is this very important thing and Jai you were very instrumental to this ah ha moment.

I am the only one responsible for my feelings.

I know that I have pushed your buttons on more than one occasion sometimes on purpose and sometimes not. And when when one of your comments gets to me I would be angry with you. Then I would also say something not nice or seem nice in the guise of being smart ass. As I go on I learned that it is all

ME. me me me me me me me me.

I am responsible for how I act and react and you were one of those gifts to me to learn this.

And for that I love you.

No I will not agree with some of your viewpoints but how I react to that is solely my responsibility.

Dear Jai,

Welcome to the human world. We are all of us sensitive at times and hurt when others deliberately disagree with us. It is what makes us human and even more it is what makes us special. We who care what others think of us are the ones that care the most to help others. Even when we think we have learned and gone beyond others judgement of us there will be days that we will regress at times and let hurt in.

We shouldnt take downvotes personaly for our answeres will not allways resonate with all whome we try to help. We can only do what we do best to the best of our ability and if our best is good than so be it and if not and we get a downvote than so be it too.

The positive in a downvote is to take it as a lesson learned for this will make us more sensitive to the needs of others. We will have more empathy for our fellow travelers on this journey of life and we will be able to give them what they need in a more humane way.

Love & Light

The knowlege of good and evil could be described as judging. Everything we see, hear, touch, taste, we judge it as either good or bad. When we can observe without judging, we can overcome. Jesus said to be offended for nothing. Don't let things bother you. It's your choice to label or not label good and bad. One of the things this means, is that we would have to give up caring what other people think about us. If we have past experiences that tell us that it matters, then we can do EFT to eliminate the emotional response. This is something I too am dealing with, not exactly, but similar. So, thank you for asking the question, so I can answer myself.

This does not mean to stop enjoying the beauty around us, that is not the good and bad I mean.

Here is a script for this one:

KCP: Even though I especially find it upsetting to be voted down just because I do not mince words and play games, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.

Even though I am feeling so hurt when my motive was to help, and nothing more, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.

Even though I am at a loss as to how to deal with some of our members, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.

ToH: I am at a loss as to how to deal with some of our members.

EB: I especially find it upsetting to be voted down just because I do not mince words and play games.

CoE: It just happened again today.

UE: Even Inward Quest has its share of problem children, I guess...

UN: But that down vote was given to me simply because I did not play games, nor would I go along with ignoring a situation that seemed to me to be a path to destruction or worse Why am I feeling so hurt when my motive was to help, and nothing more?

Chin: Vesuvius once recommended to me, "Don't feed the trolls!"

CB:Then why do we do it anyway? Why do we give points to obviously off-the-wall questions and answers?

UA: I feel so frustrated when people judge me

Wrists: I feel like they aren't really hearing what I am saying.

KCP: I feel so discouraged when people downvote me

ToH: If only they would hear/understand what I am saying.

EB: If other people would stop feeding the trolls, maybe they would go away

SoE: I only wish other people would see that this person is a troll

UE: Other people should not be so tollerant of trolls

UN: They shouldn't have so many points, they are a troll

Chin: Trolls don't deserve any points

CB: Trolls should just go away and let us be spiritual here

UA: This is a site for spiritual growth after all

Wrists: Not trolls

KCP: they should get the downvotes, not me

Take a deep breath, drink some water

then tap in your positive response to how you want to feel using I choose and stuff like the other one.

Include your words- of course, this is just my opinion

I took your words and I took some of my feelings about trolls and added that and then exagerated it for EFT. I hope you don't take it wrong. I will refer back to this next time I feel frustrated by what I feel to be a troll. Blessings

Why let the voting system stress you out? There are more important things in life, like helping others and sharing happiness with each other.

Notice carefully that when ppl make statements about others, they are talking about themselves. Read their comments and posts substituting the name of the person making the post for the person they are making remarks about. You can gain some great insights.

This is just one of the reasons I often say that I am writing here, but really talking with myself.

@Jaianniah

It seems to me that the Universe or Source likes to present us with situations in which we invest energy.

Source is an "Energy Hound!" It sees where we invest energy in the endless smorgesbord it presents and gives us more similar situitaions. If we invest energy and focus in what we consider "controversy" Source gives us more of those situations.

Source is divinely indifferent to what we consider "good" and "Bad". It just IS!

You just get back what you put out. It is that simple.

Perhaps this Law, is so simple that we overlook it?