I have frequent nightmares, and have had them ever since I was raped in 2007.
I have a rape counselor, and I have gone through their award-winning program for victims of sexual assault.
Yet, I still have nightmares.
I am now terrified of being alone at night, and wake frequently.
My dreams are typical anxiety dreams; I am usually being chased by a frightening person who has a gun, and he gets closer and closer, until I wake up.
I also have dreams of intense frustration: I dream that I am injured and near death. My mother happens to be giving a party. I go to my mother, and show her my cut-off arm or whatever injury I have suffered in the dream. She tells me to go away; I am disrupting her party. I wander from person to person, and they all ignore me. I cry in my sleep; When I wake up, my pillow is soaked with tears.
I have a psychiatrist who is trying two different medications to calm my sleeping mind, but I have this feeling that this is something that goes really deep.
What do you think? Should I seek counseling for the dreams? Or should I try to ride this out?
asked 07 Jan '10, 10:31
My last gf I was with about year ago was raped as well. Multiples times. My mother also was too, but my past gf took the cake of some of the most Stephen King ### I have ever heard.
It was really tough because she would have the same things you would describe. She couldn't sleep every other night and would toss and turn and sometimes just wake up crying. It was pretty horrible to witness. I wanted nothing more in the world, but to help her and make it go all away.
Part of what made it so bad with what she went through at the time was that no one believed her and no one did anything about it. Not even the cops. I recognized that part just the same with you with how your consciousness was projecting the dream from your true feelings.
You being seriously injured with the arm cut off and the people that mattered and were close to you ignoring you IS a pretty obvious translation of your consciousness replaying that out again, but with different props.
I know this was a post from a really long time ago, but I figured I would still add in my input anywho. I strongly feel that it is important that you or even someone else who had this same type of experience reading this realize that you never deserved this, and that it is not your fault that it happened. That is step one. You will constantly go back to those memories and re-experience them if you cannot get past that first step.
You do not need to wait for those people involved in the incident to come back and apologize or have yourself understand the whole story of why they did or why it happened the way it did. Their apologies and explanation are typically not the missing pieces of yourself that you assume you would get back from them and fill in those voids they made within you is what I have witnessed.
I'd also like to add in,
This is hard for me to word, but pretending we took a time machine back to a year ago of the girl I am talking about in this story,
Even though it was a harsh and horrible set of experiences, I could still see that there were parts of her that actually believed some of the horrible ways they made her feel about her herself were possibly true deep down at times. I feel that this is where the nightmares come in and actually play out how she truly felt about herself, even though she didn't realize it about herself.
So basically what I am trying to say with all of this, is a part of you still doesn't feel your worth it, your loved, your undeserving of this tragedy, you were telling the truth. A part of you actually still buys into the b u ll #### of what they made you feel about yourself, WHICH IS TOTALLY AND ABSOLUTELY NOT TRUE EVER EVER!!! REMEMBER THAT!! PLEASE!!!!
I wouldn't presume that I am qualified to answer this. But I would never tell anyone that it's inappropriate to find help if they think they need it.
I would suggest that you try to find someone who specializes in Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.
I answered this here about TFT, EFT and TAT for trauma. I do believe one of the things you can do is accept that it is okay to feel this way, you have a right to feel this way, so don't fight that but accept that. Don't say for example I should be over this by now, like there is something wrong with you, say I have a right to feel this way, I accept that I feel this way, it is okay if I feel this way, this is natural to feel this way.
This acceptance is a first step to recovery.
answered 08 Jan '10, 20:18
"What do you think? Should I seek counseling for the dreams? Or should I try to ride this out?"
Dreams are non-physical, they are astral space..
Here I'm going to tell you a SECRET..
You may not want to hear it.. but I'm going to be straight with you..
YOU ARE CREATING YOUR MISERY IN LIFE..
Let me give you a example.. your a baby.. and someone took your lollypop away.. that's your entire RAPE SPIEL in a nutshell.. your so busy crying for your lollypop.. you really can't live your life, or have fun, or love yourself or even let go.
So I have to tell you baby.. stop crying over spilled milk. Let go of this experience, love yourself.. and if you continue to have problems. Go heal in any form you can listen to beethoven (this is a bashar permission slip to heal) http://youtu.be/9AjFN4uD3h4 see a professional healer, practice healing tools and techniques there are billions.. and if you do all that baby.. you will be done with spilled milk.. and a NEW sucker will manifest in your hand.. and love joy can then flood your life because you've taken your attention off your owie/your pour me
And then the love can come in.. it's my suggestion.. "misery is optional" you don't have to choose or create that is your choice creator god :)
Also I want to be clear.. "a counselor" can be a excuse/permission slip to heal but there are easier cheaper and even sometimes LESS painful methods :)
My dear @Jaianniah. I just noticed this post for the first time! So sorry. Yes, if you can, seek counseling. I know that you want to improve, to get this off your mind. I have never had anything like this happen to me so I can only barely imagine what you must have gone through and are still going through.
But I do believe in therapy, especially group.
I have not really interacted with you before, but @Dollar Bill speaks highly of you. You and he have a mutual friend, BW. He knows some of your heartaches.
Know that we care and are praying for peace for both you and Wade.
answered 26 Nov '13, 17:49
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