i appreciate this environment where i can share things and get responses and advice from people who i know truly care. im greatful to everyone who makes out time to read and offer advice to others that seek it. thanks. I have something i want to share and i also need help.

with careful observation for my thoughts, i have found out that i truly always expect things to go wrong, even though i try to think right but my belief system has long been fashioned to expect the negative. i could attribute this mental attitude to how my home used to be when i was growing up, i lived in an abusive home, my mother was greatly abused by my dad and sometimes we kids, i always lived in fear and at a point i was suicidal. i guess all these made me have this belief, even though i have been a christain and i profess positive things somehow i dont make as much progress as i desire.

for instance, i have had 3 good godly men who were really in love with me leave me even though i am pretty and i am always willing to adjust to their desires, they still go. somehow something will happen and they will leave. i am in another relationship now and i dont want it messed up. These past few days i have battled with thoughts of my man liking another person or leaving me like others. it has really been a battle. i dont want these kind of experience again.

I have written down some statements of belief and i keep saying them to myself because i need to change my entire belief system so that there is no more resistance to my desires.

I guess i am on the right track but i welcome suggestions, advice and words of encouragement.

Thank you so much.

asked 27 May '10, 07:26

Sunshine's gravatar image


edited 27 May '10, 07:59

Barry%20Allen's gravatar image

Barry Allen ♦♦


If you click on the tag in the top corner of this page titled beliefs, you'll see a number of questions that will help you with belief changing.

What I would like to say in response to this question, however, is that perhaps you are being a little hard on yourself.

Everything that has happened to you in your life up to now has brought you to a point where you are questioning your fundamental beliefs and assumptions about the world you live in - otherwise you wouldn't be on this website.

You are looking at the world in a very different way to that which the majority of people view it. And you're beginning to get some sense of the power you have over your own life.

You're waking up!

Now is that really such a bad thing? :)

Something else to bear in mind is that whenever something you don't like happens to you, you have (in that exact moment) created vibrationally the thing you do like even more powerfully.

In other words, the more poverty you experience, the more wealth you have created vibrationally for yourself.

The more sickness you experience, the more health you have created vibrationally for yourself.

The more bad relationships you experience, the more joyful relationships you have created vibrationally for yourself.

Yes, you may not be experiencing that health, wealth and joyful relationships in this exact moment but what is happening to you is that you are creating a greater potential for those things to come to you more easily.

alt text

As you stretch a piece of elastic further and further, it will eventually reach the point when it will just slide off your fingers and snap immediately and easily back into place. In other words, through living alot of unwanted things in your life, you have set yourself up for some amazing manifestations.

All you have to do is relax and lighten up a bit and allow those desires to snap into your reality.

And one of the best ways to allow that snap is just to be kinder to yourself. Find reasons that you can be happy right now even if you don't have everything you want, or everyone doesn't behave the way you want.

Don't beat yourself up because everything in your life isn't perfect, or hasn't been perfect.

Guess what? Your life will never be perfect...because life was not meant to be perfect...perfection implies there is nothing more that can be improved upon...and that implies the end of desire...and life is all about desire.

But the interesting thing about life is that the more you decide you'll give up being hard on yourself for not having what you want, the more easily you'll get what you want.

Rather than trying so hard to change your belief system, just find reasons to be thankful for the good things that you have already and, before you know it, you'll have plenty more good things snapping into place.


answered 27 May '10, 21:35

Stingray's gravatar image


edited 27 May '10, 21:46

Thanks Stingray, i thought about it sometimes too, that maybe i was too hard on me and too eager to see things change. so i will just relax, give thanks and enjoy the ride.

(28 May '10, 13:24) Sunshine

Exactly! When you relax you create room for allowing and the manifestation! All the best! Great comment Stingray!! Love it!!

(10 Aug '10, 16:42) figure8shape

@Stingray- Yes..."Give up being hard on yourself for not having what you want", that line is so cool it's gotta wear shades.

(11 Jul '12, 09:07) Nikulas

"Turn Up Your Love-Even If You Don't Get What You Want" KEN KEYES :)

(11 Jul '12, 09:26) Satori
showing 2 of 4 show 2 more comments

Just like you appreciated and said thanks to those folks here on InwardQuest. Do the same with your relationships. Give thanks and gratitude of those things you like about your relationship and also express it with your partner. I do recommend doing those things that make you happy and not always adjusting to their desires. Yes, do those things that make you happy, but be more independant also. It's ok.

I tell my girlfriend all the time how thankful I am for meeting her and that she is wonderful, amazing, supportive, and the best. Sounds corny, but I'm happy.


answered 27 May '10, 22:14

RPuls's gravatar image


Love yourself,know that you are perfect as you are.when you are happy with your self it is easier to be happy with others.


answered 28 May '10, 07:30

ursixx's gravatar image


Click here to create a free account

If you are seeing this message then the Inward Quest system has noticed that your web browser is behaving in an unusual way and is now blocking your active participation in this site for security reasons. As a result, among other things, you may find that you are unable to answer any questions or leave any comments. Unusual browser behavior is often caused by add-ons (ad-blocking, privacy etc) that interfere with the operation of our website. If you have installed these kinds of add-ons, we suggest you disable them for this website



Asked: 27 May '10, 07:26

Seen: 2,245 times

Last updated: 11 Jul '12, 09:26

Follow this question

By Email:

Once you sign in you will be able to subscribe for any updates here



Answers and Comments

Markdown Basics

  • *italic* or _italic_
  • **bold** or __bold__
  • link:[text](http://url.com/ "title")
  • image?![alt text](/path/img.jpg "title")
  • numbered list: 1. Foo 2. Bar
  • to add a line break simply add two spaces to where you would like the new line to be.
  • basic HTML tags are also supported

Related Questions