And not in the sense of a good circle. I feel like I am completely wasting my life and I'll soon reach a point at which I don't want to live anymore because I'll be backed into a corner due to age. I've relied on the Law to expand my options in life enough for me to not live in constant despair but I'm not seeing results and I am feeling more like a failure every day.

Some people may remember that my basic desire was to grow about 6 or 7 inches. I have not achieved even a centimeter of growth. On a daily basis I do OK but when I notice that another month has passed and I've had no progress at all, this hurts me. I can't see the finishing line, the light at the end of the tunnel. I'm asking for help again.

asked 28 May '13, 02:15

flowsurfer's gravatar image


edited 29 May '13, 03:59

Barry%20Allen's gravatar image

Barry Allen ♦♦

I don't know anything about your body type or stature or posture, so assuming perfection in all categories this may not apply to you.

Most people don't have perfectly straight spines, nor much separation in their vertebrae, etc. Stretching can elongate your body in a few ways, particularly in straightening up problem areas (often hips and lower back).

Focus more on flexibility less on strength, because strength can sometimes restrict this. Yoga is what I'd suggest. I've gotten taller, but ~

(29 May '13, 04:06) Snow

~ only because I had numerous problem areas where I could improve on. My hips weren't properly aligned upright, my lower back and core were strong but S shaped which made it harder for me to expand in this area, my neck was extremely hunched over and allowed much more reach when straightened out, etc.

Like I said, I don't know your situation and I don't want to give you false hope, but it's theoretically possible and I with or without growth I hope you find comfort with yourself some way.

(29 May '13, 04:08) Snow

I realize you are trying to be helpful but having a longer torso with the same-length legs would not help me.

(29 May '13, 17:12) flowsurfer

@flowsurfer - Snow made an excellent point & I agree - stretching. I'm a bit taller than I was when I was 20. People are surprised when I mention my height. They think I'm taller than I actually am. Lift weights (they don't have to be heavy) - it will change your appearance faster than anything - other than a smile, that is. Your posture will change & you'll feel more confident. I do. Do aerobic activates & get those healthy endorphin's flow -ing.

(04 Jun '13, 02:12) ele

@ele I'm not interested in being half an inch taller. I'm interested in being 6-7 inches taller.

(04 Jun '13, 02:56) flowsurfer
showing 0 of 5 show 5 more comments

Flowsurfer, your not going to like this much...sorry.

You need to make peace with where you are just now. Youve told me that the height thing is " non negotiable" youve also claimed that your not going to be happy until this is resolved.

Now we can all go round the houses on this one, we can assure you that in some parallel universe youll gain this height. But in your heart you know this will never happen, you do know this i believe. Of course you can still carry on doing everything you know how to do, you can get more opinions from people on this site. By all means keep giving it your best shot. But arnt you getting sick of this by now?

So my advice is to make a " peace pact" with the height thing, now i know youve said its non negotiable but frankly your living with this anyway, so you might as well make peace with this.

If you dont you will spend the rest of this reality struggling and fighting something that youll never overcome. This struggle will depleat and mis direct your energies and move you into a " life track" where frustration about your height will bother you more and more. You will find more and more reasons to feel the way you do.

And the result will be that you will continue going around in circles, which you do feel that your doing.

Something has to change, if it doesnt you will continue getting what your getting.

Your obsession with the height thing and your subsequent vibration is giving you more and more of what you dont want. Your holding yourself in this misery, and unfortunately do to the nature of this and other realities your moving yourself steadily into worse ones.

You have a choice here. You can choose to make this peace, or you can carry on as you are.

Your going to reach alignment with who you really are anyway. You can do this now , in this reality. Or you can end this reality and align in the next one.

Your choice.

Im not having a go at you Flowsurfer, i like you. Your cool.


answered 28 May '13, 02:57

Monty%20Riviera's gravatar image

Monty Riviera

I don't care about parallel universes. Yes, I am "sick of this". But I don't think you understand that I've already tried to "let go of this" only to realize there is no life worth living for me if I do. I'm told "You can do this!" and it makes me sick to think of living my life like that, because it's not the life I want. I feel zero excitement for everything. If I can't overcome this, there is nothing for me to live for. The reason I feel hurt is because I feel I'll never overcome this.

(28 May '13, 03:08) flowsurfer

It will kill me to give up. I won't bother to justify why.

(28 May '13, 03:09) flowsurfer

Then dont give up Flowsurfer! Carry on.

(28 May '13, 03:21) Monty Riviera

I'm having difficulty carrying on without seeing some sort of light at the end of the tunnel.

(28 May '13, 03:27) flowsurfer
showing 2 of 4 show 2 more comments

Hey flowsurfer. Feeling bad sucks, doesn't it :(

Pointing your finger at an outer physical object/manifestation and telling it off because it's not serving you, is silly.

I'll illustrate the important idea with imagined examples.

  • Growing taller = an excuse, you have allowed, to decide you will act and feel more confident in the world
  • Growing taller = an excuse, you have allowed, to decide that you will become the greatest vision you have of yourself
  • Growing taller = an excuse, you have allowed, to decide you feel worthy of whatever you want to feel worthy about
  • Growing taller = an excuse, you have allowed, to decide you will love yourself under every condition and through every experience

When you, flowsurfer, grow taller, you will obtain the liberty to alter some of your own belief systems about certain topics and ideas.

The gift is, you already have that liberty. Always have. Always will.

Just yesterday at my work I managed to get a script of one of my employees dealing with a customer.

Department of Belief System Changing

Employee: Next!


E: Hello today. Let's start with your name. Name?

C: Coolsurfer

E: Thankyou. I'll just look you up on the computer for your records...Ah, here you are. So, you put in a claim for 3 months ago that you would like to alter some beliefs?

C: Yes that's correct.

E: Yes, and if you could just tell me which beliefs you'd like to alter?

C: Ok, I'd like to have the belief that I can feel confident everywhere I go and that I can be happy and stand out more in a crowd at parties and similar events, and be a source of fun and pleasure.

E: Right, right. Ok, well, it says here on our database that we would be more than happy to alter those beliefs for you, of course, you were informed that in order for those beliefs to change you would have to increase in height by 3 feet.

C: Yes, that sounds fairly accurate.

E: So last time we measured you at 8ft 5. Do you have records for me that prove you have grown up to 11ft 5?

C: Yes, I have measurements here, certified and approved by myself. I wrote it down on some note paper to not forget, here it is...

E: Terrific! Ok, in that case, I'll just log in and change those beliefs for you right now.

C: Oh thankyou so much. You don't realise how much better my life is going to get now...


E: I hope you realise you didn't need to grow that tall for me to alter these things.

C: But you told me I had to grow another 3ft!!

E: Well that was only because you threatened us not to change your beliefs until you did that.

C:...Really? So I could have just asked you to change my beliefs even if I remained the same height?

E: Yep.

C: I'm pissed off now. How dare you forced me to grow that tall to do that! I could have saved so much mental effort!

E: Don't worry, we see this sort of shock from customers all the time. We're trained to deal with it.


answered 29 May '13, 10:05

Nikulas's gravatar image


I don't want to change a "belief", in the sense you are speaking, I want to change the "outer physical". Like a painter that wants to change a detail in his painting, I want to paint a life for myself. The inability to express that creativity tells me that there is something very dark about the nature of reality and I cannot simply dismiss that darkness. I am aware of it even if I pretend it's OK. Even if I decided I didn't care about height anymore. It's not about traditional self-confidence.

(29 May '13, 16:56) flowsurfer

It's about my fundamental relationship with the world. Am I the slave of circumstances? Am I essentially powerless? Am I toyed with by forces greater than me? Am I at the mercy of others? Or am I free? Am I really loved by God or am I just an animal in the jungle? Confidence without a metaphysical foundation is fake; even "regular" confidence is backed by a metaphysical foundation, that of materialism, you are confident because you can back up that confidence.

(29 May '13, 17:01) flowsurfer

A weak wolf trying to be alpha will be torn apart. If I cannot choose if I am weak or strong, if I cannot choose what kind of person I am, "confidence" is like putting make-up on a pig. It cannot hide the metaphysical insecurity in which I live. If I can choose, then even in weakness I am strong.

(29 May '13, 17:08) flowsurfer

@flowsurfer- Im a little lost with what you are trying to ask/tell me.

  • "fake" confidence is very possible, I feel people with it all the time. I used to be that- a "fake" confident guy, my outer actions were couragiously put on to show I was confident...I am a good actor, so unfortunantly that fake confidence didnt serve me. I still felt awkward and shy.

  • real confidence: Doesnt matter what you look like or what skills you have. You are accepting being you and dont care what others think.

(29 May '13, 22:04) Nikulas

@flowsurfer- Another point: I think you have missed the entire idea I was trying to convey.

There are agreed physical boundaries and limitations we collectivly subscribed to when we decided to incarnate on earth: the need for oxygen, gravity, the impossibility of not growing 4 hands and 8 legs. Whilst the rare exception of people can transcend these boundaries, the question is, is is relevant?

(29 May '13, 22:07) Nikulas

@flowsurfer- You're not happy with the height you are, or, you're unhappy with your inability to grow to the height you want. You're unsatisfied with the inability to 'apply LOA' and get what you want.

So, because you cannot do that, you think of yourself as less. You'll accept yourself and enjoy life conditionally. You won't have fun and life, love and experience life regardless.

I am more than happy to keep repeating this in different ways. Have fun now, accept and love yourself now.

(29 May '13, 22:13) Nikulas

Even if I somehow have agreed to this limitation, I no longer want to play under those rules. So either the rules change or I leave the game. I quite simply do not like this game. I hate living right now. It's not a matter of "just have fun", there is no way for me to have fun, I don't see anything fun about this game anymore and I only see it getting worse in the future if I accept the limitations of these rules.

(29 May '13, 22:46) flowsurfer

@flowsurfer- I appreciate your honesty and boldness.

What I have discovered is when I feel "life is just bad and I dont want to be in it"- the issue only draws down to one or two problems that you can clear up.

Write out a list of all the things bothering you in your life or things you have to do. Do some of those things; I guaruntee you whilst you may say you want to grow taller there are other things you feel are more important.

Also, just make an effort to have fun. Comedy?

(29 May '13, 22:52) Nikulas

So it is relevant. It may not be relevant to you but it is to me. Under the current parameters, the game of life holds zero appeal to me. I'd rather die than play it. I say this with the awareness that I'm afraid of death, both of the experience of going through death and of the possible finality in it, so it's not like I am eager to find a gun and pull the trigger. But those two pressures, of not wanting to live this life and not wanting to die keep me centered on wanting a different, new life.

(29 May '13, 22:53) flowsurfer

There are no easy fixes in my life Nikulas. There is no simple thing off a list I can do to make things better. I'm focused on height because it's a foundational thing. It allows me to build from the ground up the kind of life I want. Without it, whatever I do is just shuffling stuff around, nothing I do has any importance and will just reveal the problems in another area; it is a life devoid of love. I've never kissed a girl but going out and checking that off a list won't make me happy.

(29 May '13, 23:08) flowsurfer

This whole "list approach" irritates me a lot. What is bothering me in my life is not a thing, it's the big picture. I don't even know if the big picture has any hope anymore. It's increasingly difficult for me to even imagine how the big picture could change in a positive way. I think I may be broken beyond repair. What good could possibly come to me at this point in my life? I need to believe that the law can rescue me otherwise I'll just give up completely.

(29 May '13, 23:19) flowsurfer

I thought my life was going to be better than this. I never thought I would turn out into such a loser. This is not how my life was supposed to go.

(29 May '13, 23:29) flowsurfer

@flowsurfer- So you want a girlfriend? Is this really want this draws down to?

"It allows me to build from the ground up the kind of life I want." Are you able to tell me, with full conviction, that your passion cannot be embarked on until you grow taller? Are you seriously unable to not start that passion now, even a tiny bit, until you are your dream height? Is this all about becoming the worlds tallest basketball player?

(30 May '13, 00:57) Nikulas

No, this is not what this draws down to. Yes, I am able to tell you with full conviction that my passion cannot be embarked on until I grow taller; you may believe I am wrong in that conviction but nothing anyone has said to me so far has shown me how, they just reinforce it by showing me nobody has thought of anything that I haven't, or sees anything that I don't. No, this is not about becoming the world's tallest anything; above 6'2 height starts becoming a problem.

(30 May '13, 01:59) flowsurfer
showing 2 of 14 show 12 more comments


I read here on IQ accept yourself completely as you are. When you're in peace with your current situation, then only you can change it. If you're worried about your height, don't be worried accept yourself as you are, love yourself unconditionally. Regarding modelling.., why don't you rethink about it? Maybe.., God might want you to try for some other great profession which suits you better.., who knows, maybe.., you may excel in something else.

Regarding dating, however God has made you, it will always serve its purpose. don't try to change it..., the girl whosoever will fall for you .., obviously if her love for you's true.., she'll love you for your beautiful heart not just for outer beauty/height.

I hope i've helped you anyway..

love, light n blessings ur wayy

supergirl :))


answered 29 May '13, 05:06

supergirl's gravatar image


edited 29 May '13, 13:13

ru%20bis's gravatar image

ru bis

@flowsurfer: I was commenting on your comment "And what belief/emotion would I erase/dissolve?" And no I am not suggesting change in what you want.
I got a mental image of an airplane in a downward spiral
alt text
Your at the controls but the autopilot is on (your autopilot is all the I can't ,I will never, cannot, doesn't....) Your not incapacitated! Grab the stick, turn off the auto pilot. Work on pulling the plane up (changing your negative beliefs) Now you say "A belief is just an expectation and it's conditioned by experience and reason." Well guess what those past expectations and experiences.They are not going to get you out of this spin. And your reason is why you are trying to talk to the control tower to get help NOW .Get a feel for the plane now see what happens when you listen to the instructions.Your expectations will change because you are in control. As well as the experience.
I have a lot of admiration for you flowsurfer. It takes a real big man to to question your life and not give up. It might take you awhile to get you plane up to cruising altitude and there will probably some turbulence along the way, but there is always someone in the control tower to help you out.You might need to adjust the radio now and then to get a clear and understandable response .But the answer will come! They will get you safe on the ground.You will turn this around


answered 30 May '13, 06:47

ursixx's gravatar image


(31 May '13, 02:36) ursixx

examine were to effectively
slow down the wheel to fix
where energy is wasting

you begin to effect the
circle to change with the
energy saved from above


answered 29 May '13, 21:40

fred's gravatar image


I seem to recognize the downward spiral from which you are talking. And the more you try to think and come up with ideas, you are simply choosing reinforcing thoughts. As Abraham would say, get into the Vortex first. First of all, I would recommend Stop All Judgement Right Now. Own your feelings, integrate them, feel them in your body, don't think about them. Don't think, feel.

Bashar would say that when it's finally ok that you don't grow taller, then you'll grow taller. But he would also say that creation follows the path of least resistance: I think you can attract all that unconsciously being taller represents for you before getting taller Why? because of mass conciousness, and the path of least resistance.

Ask yourself (I know you are tired of hearing this stuff, so do it when you are relaxed)

  • What would I have to believe is true in order for me to feel this way about not being able to use LoA to grow taller?

What would I have to believe is true in order for me to feel this way about being short?

What would be the worst possible scenario if I don't grow 3 inches taller?

Ask yourself those questions, when you are relaxed, and you'll be surprised of the answers you give yourself.

As you stay in that downward spiral, as you stay out of the vortex, you are wasting your energy, you constantly deplet your sugar from your brain and you are able to think less and less clearly, you then sleep more to try to get the rest you need. The first thing you must do then, is stop the judgement, make it your first priority, stop all judgment, do not care.

Go to the movies, do something different, rent a bunch of movies and eat some ice cream. Whatever makes it for you.

I wish I am of help with this, but I'm afraid of going on because from my experience I know that when one is in this state, one simply don't want to hear it, one is only looking for reinforcing ideas.

Feel free to ask and refute any of this, I'll be checking.


answered 30 May '13, 03:03

Notgonnatellyou's gravatar image


Do you seriously think I haven't gone through cycles of doing just that? It hasn't helped. It actually makes it worse because I feel I am wasting my life.

(30 May '13, 03:10) flowsurfer

If I can't use the law for this, I can't trust the law to deliver on anything that really matters to me, which means the law is simply not real. And you know, I wish I could use the law to turn back time but I can deal with not being able to do that if I can, from where I am now, build the life I want, the life I should have lived. But the degree of miraculousness necessary to do that is increasing, not decreasing. There is nothing of value to me in life if the law isn't true.

(30 May '13, 03:22) flowsurfer

@flowsurfer Do you have a belief that it says that it's difficult to find and change your beliefs?

(30 May '13, 03:23) Notgonnatellyou

@flowsurfer, And just know there's nothing to waste, your path is your path, and every single bit of it you are learning from. You don't need to go anywhere, everything is happening right here and right now.

(30 May '13, 03:26) Notgonnatellyou

I don't have a belief that says it's difficult to find and change my beliefs.

(30 May '13, 03:31) flowsurfer

But I also don't believe beliefs are changed by simple choice. A belief is just an expectation and it's conditioned by experience and reason. So I guess sure, it's "difficult" to change my beliefs.

(30 May '13, 03:35) flowsurfer

@flowsufer "A belief is just an expectation and it's conditioned by experience and reason." That also is a belief. Its normal that you have it, but it can be changed. It takes choice. If you don't want to believe that anymore, simple choose not to. Change it for something like "I now believe that I can conciously change any belief whenever I want to" If it serves you, I will share that I've been into the deepest of depression, when you can't even sleep anymore! When you spend all your time in..

(30 May '13, 03:42) Notgonnatellyou

(cont) bed and don't get any rest. And I've come out of it without antidepressants. Because I chose to not to use them anymore. And when it all started to get better was when I simply said one night "I can't take it anymore, this time is for real, please help, whoever is listening please help" So I would recommend to you to do this: When you are ready to go fall asleep, breath consciously for 3 minutes, doesn't have to bee deep, just do it consciously with your mouth, then ...

(30 May '13, 03:46) Notgonnatellyou

(cont) ask your guide for guidance, or whoever is listening, say that you surrender, however you want to phrase it, something like "I surrender now, I ask my guide for help and guidance and I will receive it in my dream state". Then put your left hand on your heart and calmly but boldly state "This is my heart, I surrender" and mean it, do it over and over until you fall asleep. Feel the warmth and tingling sensation where your hand makes contact with your skin or shirt. Keep repeating ...

(30 May '13, 03:49) Notgonnatellyou

"this is my heart, I surrender now" over and over and feeling it. In your dream state you will receive guidance, doesn't matter if you remember or not when you wake up, I guarantee you that if you mean it, if you surrender, things will begin to change. Please do this.

(30 May '13, 03:52) Notgonnatellyou

That's not a belief, it's the definition of the word "belief". I have gone through a phase where I genuinely trusted God and felt loved and safe. My experience and reason eroded that belief into what it is now; I can no longer simply place myself in that feeling because I remember the results and I don't want to repeat that cycle. What does "I surrender" mean? Because I'm not sure "surrender" is something I am interested in.

(30 May '13, 03:56) flowsurfer

@flowsurfer I never believed in God, and when I surrendered and asked for help I did not expect anyone to answer, I was just utterly in despair. I still don't believe in the God portrayed in religions. By saying you surrender and meaning it, you will surrender to your higher self, to your heart. You most importantly will start to get rid of resistance and let the vital energy to flow. You are fighting with yourself right now, align with your higher self, your total self.

(30 May '13, 04:04) Notgonnatellyou

@I'm off to bed, please do it, you'll see.

(30 May '13, 04:04) Notgonnatellyou

I feel God doesn't hear me. That my thoughts just echo around in my head and that's it. That's why I sometimes feel the need to come here and voice them externally. I feel God has abandoned me. I don't know where to turn to.

(30 May '13, 04:06) flowsurfer
showing 2 of 14 show 12 more comments

Hello. In my experience and others more wise then me, everything and i emphasise the word nothing but a BELIEF..something that you THINK and, automatically, consider that it is TRUE to such high degree that you do not want to live anymore, in your case (the best example is the lover who looses his partner and think his/her life is over...wich is not...after a while :) )..

The real problem is not the "height" itself but what is "TELLING" you this problem.The real problem is the STORY that is created in your mind, about you having that hight..and from there a continuous STORY as a result...

Please, pay attention to your thoughts, emotions, feelings, imaginations about this height problem. Trust me, you will be surprised..but please be sincere with not deny or "run" from what you will "see" in your mind about this problem.It will be, maybe, things like : "I am not a real young man/man, I am not gonna have a succesful sexual life, I am not loved because of my height, etc..." feel me :) ? Now, 2 things are needed in order to succeed in every aspect of life :

1) First: cleanse (erase) the subconscious programming of your mind (that is beliefs,emotional roots, traumas, imaginations..) that ,as a whole issue, is giving you this problem.

2) Second: Now you can work with "manifesting tools" to achieve what you want: techniques that will bring in your life what you want to achieve.

Of course, i think that you need to be realistic to yourself and to "sense" if your wish is a fantasy or it is something workable. Anyway this "fine line" between fantasy and "realistic sense" it will be more and more clear once you begin the process of cleansing your "bad" subconscious programs. You know : "Like above, as below.."

Actually, it is better to do both aspects ( 1) and 2) ) in parallel. You will observe (being totally honest with yourself) what you really believe and not believe and act accordingly...

About the cleansing of the negative subconscious programming i would recommand you BeSetFreeFast (BSFF) : here is a short introduction with the creator of this absolutely extraordinary (in my experience) therapy :

And here is the official site :

The beauty of BSFF is that you do not fight your just, like a science man, act and erase all the bad stuff from your subconscious mind.You do not need to concentrate, just give a command to your subconscious mind and it will execute it for you...the same way it maintained and created all the beliefs and "problems" along your whole life (the subconscious mind "accepted" all that you, without realizing, gave your permission to be, for example: "If i cry and show my emotion all the people will laugh and a real man/boy doesn't do this"...

of course, this is just the interpretation you "accepted", it is not the "truth"...actually, there is no truth, just what you accept (aware or not) in your mind). And you will, rapidly, feel better and more calm and your mind will be more clear...and you will gain deeper insights about what is "really" going on in your mind, at a deeper level, and continue to cleanse as long as it is necessary. By the way, please understand, that most important thing is this : how do you want to live your life ? If the answer is "good" then treat yourself (with therapies) with this understanding: i am making my life better every day !

..and questions like: how long it will take for this ? will become irrelevant...and you will always find the power to authentically take care of yourself...

I am too, as most people, in the "search" for my "good" life, for my "good" being..we all have ups and downs, problems and achievements...(the problem with our succeses is that we do not appreciate them because of the other problems that are not solved yet and "suck" us into them :) ...)

All the best !


@flowsurfer Please belive me : You just told me your STORY ! Yes, this is the story of you, the personality who you are because you, frankly, believe all that..(beliefs,emotional roots,conclusions,etc...). And ALL this story is treatable with BSFF(i mention it because i practice it and i know how it works..).

Just make the effort to learn it- you do not need to believe that it works...because it works anyway... (or other therapy that cleanse the subconscious mind) because what you are now is the result of your past (all you accepted as being true,real..without even realizing it).

And the reason you are not succesful in something, is because you HAVE blockages in your subconscious. These are by the thousands but, luckily, they all depend on some CORE aspects like : Self-Image, Self-Trust,The Acceptance of your life(not the problems theirselves, but the life it has been given to you), Allowing yourself to be the way you are (in order to eliminate self-judgement, self-sabotaging and to create a clear understanding of what, actually, is going on at a deeper level in you so from there to create your own freedom of being yourself...more and more free and clear :) )...

And this translates to CONFLICT- so, here you have the explanation WHY you did not have a matter what problem is..Conflict means SUSTAINING two OPPOSITE beliefs in the same time ! Example: you want your height BUT, without realizing, you tell yourself that you do not DESERVE good things in your life or you are of no good or you are un unlucky person,etc....How could you, then, possibly have succes..that is for everything you still did not accomplish..this is true for me too...and for absolutely everybody...

and this is why the movie "The Secret" is just half true and, actually, in my opinion, it did more wrong (mix the truth with a lie...) then right to people :) - plus the emphasis on the money not on the Well-Being (well-being is to have money, none the less )..because on planetary level mankind learned about Law of Attraction...but give to an "insane" man a gun..)...When you begin to cleanse a problem that is in your awareness you will, most likely, see that has deeper roots and you will be surprised to uncover things you just could not "see" before because of your "surface" perception of the problem.


answered 28 May '13, 16:17

holla's gravatar image


edited 29 May '13, 03:45

Barry%20Allen's gravatar image

Barry Allen ♦♦

Not being able to grow taller is a sign of powerlessness. Being shorter than my ideal therefore is a symbol and constant reminder of powerlessness. Lack of power is lack of freedom which is lack of God's love, which means I am fundamentally alone and unsafe in the world. I'm told to focus on money, and lack of it is certainly a problem, but I cannot buy most of the things I value.

(28 May '13, 16:28) flowsurfer

I feel bad because I feel restrained from creating/choosing to live as I want and I feel inferior because others have what I want. That's really all this is. The problem cannot be solved by me making up a story about how it's OK that I'm not taller. The problem is not the height by itself but my lack of control over it. On the short term, I can convince myself that I do have control; then a couple of months pass and nothing has changed and it becomes difficult to convince myself again.

(28 May '13, 16:30) flowsurfer

It's not that I don't have "beliefs" like "height is an attribute of masculinity and being shorter than average makes me less masculine and as a result less sexually attractive". I do. But they are not the problem and I don't even care to change such beliefs. For one I don't think it's a false belief but more important, that itself doesn't make me feel that bad. If I smell bad, that doesn't make me suicidal because I can just shower; even if I don't shower, I know I can so it doesn't hurt.

(28 May '13, 16:43) flowsurfer

It's important to note that the height is not an isolated desire. It is a requirement to pursue a real career in modeling -> this is necessary for me to earn a living -> this is necessary for me to afford to do things like going out, getting a driver's license or dating. I could date without having any money, in theory, but it would require me to either lie, tell the person I'm trying to achieve something that would be seen as absurd, or assume the identity of a complete bum. All bad choices.

(28 May '13, 17:00) flowsurfer

@flowsurfer I edited my answer.Please read it ! ..all bad choices..all good choices..all you need to do/be is be free of "good/bad choices" thinking... Treat yourself with a cleansing therapy,do not "fight" or torture yourself anymore..and tell me then what's what:)All right! ps-i am a Gemini,my instinct is to analyze to death something..i learned to cut this down simply treating myself...and boom!..the peace of mind comes..answers,at least i "loose" the negative "load"..and keep healing :)

(28 May '13, 17:37) holla

@holla, please ensure you leave blank lines between your paragraphs. It makes it easier for others to read what you have written. I've reformatted your answer for you

(29 May '13, 04:10) Barry Allen ♦♦

@holla- can u pls explain hw to use BSFF?

(29 May '13, 04:57) supergirl

Is BSFF Faster EFT with a cue word replacing the tapping? It does seem very similar.

(29 May '13, 12:16) Monty Riviera

@Barry Allen Thank you !

@ supergirl @Monty Riviera

Yes, BSFF is the upgraded version of EFT. You use a cue word to give a command to your subconscious mind to erase/dissolve a belief/emotion and this is by far faster and deeper then EFT. Dr. Larry Nims used EFT too, then he realized that the meridians/energetic channels are also controlled by the subconscious he addresed directly the "controller" of all that is going on within a man ( and a woman :) ) Please see the clips above!

(29 May '13, 12:36) holla

Thanks holla, im doing a fair amount of EFT at the mo, i like it and will look into the Nims thing too.

(29 May '13, 13:13) Monty Riviera

And what belief/emotion would I erase/dissolve?

(29 May '13, 16:43) flowsurfer

@flowsurfer I would say the belief that is limiting you and drives a lot your questions..Is that your not perfect as you are now. "I'm not perfect" "I will never be perfect" ...Think of all of your beliefs and troubles stem from those 2 short phrases

(29 May '13, 17:52) ursixx

@ursixx Don't you understand what you're saying? I feel pain (or sometimes simply lack pleasure) because I cannot express my creativity, I cannot shape my life. You're saying that the solution is to not care about shaping my life, then I won't feel pain. But it's not the pain that I'm trying to "escape" from, it's the powerlessness.

(29 May '13, 18:40) flowsurfer

@ursixx You are telling me to fake happiness by changing "what I want" to be "what I already have", that way there is no conflict and there is the illusion of freedom, of love; if I need an illusion it's because the real thing doesn't exist, it implies I can't change "what I have" to be "what I want". I'm being lead around in a leash and have to go where my master takes me instead of being free to go in the direction I want.

(29 May '13, 18:45) flowsurfer

I'm beginning to feel the futility of asking for help here because there is little respect for my desires. They are seen as illegitimate, something that needs to be fixed, a sign of psychological deficiency. It's like a slave that shares his desire to be free and frustration with his condition as a slave and is seen as suffering from drapetomania. If you don't know how to help me, I get it, I don't really know either, can't blame you. But I don't judge myself for wanting what I want.

(29 May '13, 19:17) flowsurfer
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I'm curious what will being taller bring to you? Lets say you are now 6 to 7 inches taller whats your plan? what would you do with your life. Whats something you love to do?

Its possible in future there will be some technologies that might increase height. Even now there might be some technologies too, i am not sure that you can research. So fundamentally nothing is impossible in that sense. There are people who wear slightly higher heels even men to gain some height too. i have in the past worn occasionally something that adds 2 inches. You can design some shoe to add 3 inches to 3 and 1/2 inches and if you customize the shoe you can get away with easily 3 inches looking natural.

Now as someone mentioned if you already have not worked out a lot and done yoga, then you can consider that to make your posture much more erect, that could give you 1/2 to 1 inch.

There are also fashion designers who can get you clothes that will make you look taller. Example horizontal stripes usually makes you look fatter and vertical stripes makes you thinner. So i am sure fashion designers know how to make you look taller. Also some hair style changes and maybe hat etc can add another dimension too.

If you add all these up you could have a clear 4-5 inches or more extra height quite easily.


answered 29 May '13, 19:30

abrahamloa's gravatar image


other things that can also happen are: i moved to america and my height now was shorter for this country since avge height here is more. So in the same way if you move to some country where avge height is much lower then suddenly you will be perceived much taller for example. These things can happen too.

(29 May '13, 19:41) abrahamloa

You need to also remember that there are lot of real tall people who dont live their lives to fullest and live in worries, and there are lot of shorter people who live life to the fullest, they are millionaires enjoy life like crazy etc. So being tall does not get you too much as you may think.

(29 May '13, 19:42) abrahamloa

i just found this on google too. "According to ABC News, a "growing" number of men are going through painful cosmetic surgery involving limb-lengthening procedures to improve upon their self-image. Dr. Dror Paley, an orthopaedic surgeon at the Paley Institute at St. Mary's Medical Center in West Palm Beach, Fla., has performed 650 leg-lengthening surgeries in the past few years, ABC News reports."

(29 May '13, 19:45) abrahamloa

I'll give you the simple and easy answer: modeling. It is not the full answer but that is my "plan". I cannot pursue a modeling career by wearing high heels and vertical stripes.

(29 May '13, 19:46) flowsurfer

yes i agree. How about becoming an actor? I know its not modeling and alters your plan a bit but when you become famous actor you can be on all the front cover magazines wearing the best clothes and you will be sought by paparazzis to be in the magazines. you will still be raved by millions.

(29 May '13, 19:50) abrahamloa

you can also then come up with your own freaking company to run modelling shows where height would not be issue... because in all honest it should not have been in the first place...

(29 May '13, 19:51) abrahamloa

I know about Limb Lengthening. If five years ago I had the money to do it, I would have done it because even though there are problems, I felt there was enough time to finish the work and enjoy the results of it. I no longer feel I have that kind of time to invest. Regardless, I don't have the money and don't see any significant money coming to me anytime soon.

(29 May '13, 19:52) flowsurfer
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Asked: 28 May '13, 02:15

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Last updated: 05 Jun '13, 04:35

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