That is the question. I know exactly what I want. I have made a list of all the attributes I would like. I have a therapist who subscribes to the teachings of Abraham and Esther Hicks. And I see her in a women's group.

I have listened to Abraham Hicks youtube pieces on 30 days to get into the vortex. This is something I would like to do. There are many things that have happened in the past that shook me to the core and threw off my balance and my confidence in myself. My therapist has called it trauma. She says I have been betrayed, traumatized, and the world does not feel safe.

She has said everyone is minimizing what has happened. I know I am not giving the details. I don't feel like reliving that. I feel like I am at a point where I am moving beyond all of that. And have closed it off with a makeshift but sturdy wall. I know I have a lot to offer someone. I am doing the outward things to manifest- placing an online ad, and I have met people. And it has built my confidence.

I really pushed myself by "feeling the fear and doing it anyway". But I'd like to get to the point of trusting... and expecting and having calm assurance about the whole process. Thank you to all who are reading.

asked 06 Dec '15, 10:28

mirima's gravatar image


edited 06 Dec '15, 10:55

IQ%20Moderator's gravatar image

IQ Moderator ♦♦

Greetings mirima,

Good for you for healing yourself and sharing your journey with others.

Realize that the only thing you can do, really, to find your soulmate is to keep walking your path and working on yourself. I would take the list of attributes you've created and begin doing as much as I could to become that individual myself.

Often times, we want something outside of ourselves to do something we don't want to do or are afraid to do. But become the individual you want to spend the rest of your life with and the individual you've been searching for is you. Until you can be okay being with yourself, without the soulmate, you can't attract that individual you're so desperately seeking. Who you will attract is someone who is needy and will create a co-dependent relationship with you.

I would say continue doing what you're doing and trust that you will find your soulmate. But pushing to find that individual will only stress you out and, unfortunately, result in missing that one moment when the two of you miss each other at the Starbucks, at the store, etc. because you're too busy looking at your list of attributes. When you've done the work to have those attributes in yourself, it'll be easy to recognize them in others.

I hope this helps!



answered 07 Dec '15, 17:27

Luke%20Wonders's gravatar image

Luke Wonders

Like attracts like.

Continue each day with being your happier self and your partner will arrive.


answered 07 Dec '15, 19:27

Taszanian's gravatar image


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Asked: 06 Dec '15, 10:28

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Last updated: 07 Dec '15, 19:27

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