Something strange is happening to me! As of two days ago I suddenly really needed a time out from everyone I know. I warned everyone as I didn't want people worrying or being annoyed if they didn't get a response to calls/texts/emails etc, and then I stayed in my flat (something that gives me enormous pleasure and comfort) and didn't talk to anyone for two days.
That's not so unusual for me, although in the past it has usually been connected with depression, but this time it's completely the opposite - I feel as though I need space and time out because I'm expanding - I have been reading and thinking and working things out for myself LOADS, meditating, listening to Abraham (because it makes me feel good); I'm even considering going and finding some sun and a beach for a week so I can just be with myself.
I honestly don't think there is anything sinister about any of this in terms of shutting myself away - I have also been out and about and talked to people I don't know - but I thought a couple of days would do it and now I am feeling that this could go on for a long time! (Which makes me feel both excited and guilty.)
I feel like I can't be around anyone who is important to me because I'm so easily swayed by their thoughts and comments and opinions at this early stage in working things out for myself. And I have a feeling that they will be too 'loud' for me (I am mostly sitting in silence whereas usually I'd have the radio on most of the day) and too negative.
I do find myself working very hard on replacing negative thoughts because of all the habits of thought I picked up while I was ill with depression (a long time) and I feel nervous about exposing myself all raw like this to others' albeit unintentional negativity.
Sorry this is rather long winded (and a bit personal I just realised!) but I was wondering if anyone else has been through something similar, and whether it lasted a long time, or what it might mean? What if I never want to 'go back'?! Any thoughts appreciated, thanks.:)
Oh, and PS. I have been doing the Getting Into The Vortex meditations for over two weeks now; could this have something to do with it? Even though I don't feel very Vortexy when I do them....
asked 29 Dec '10, 21:14
You are accelerating, raising your vibration and to a point that you're physical vehicle needs time to adjust to that frequency. It is both your mind, body and spirit that is trying to hold more and more of the Universal energy and that's why you need time alone. It is "normal" in this spiritual paradigm of thinking so be excited, be cheerful, be full of apprecieation and ready for some major changes that are coming and just breath it in, breath it in..
On a personal note -- I just watched a movie with my father called "August Rush". It's about a boy who has been taken away from his parents and is reunited after ten years with them.
Needless to say I cried like a little boy and I wasn't ashamed of it! I huged my father afterward and said that I loved him and that I'm thankful for everything he has ever done for me.
And so, what I'm experiencing right now is accumulating more and more experiences into my life, more and more energy is coming forth and to utilize it, to integrate all of it, I need times out. I just got so used to it and I've observed it in many spiritual teachers, that it's the natural way to go.
Life goes like this in my opinion - experience ->integrate-> experience-> integrate-> experience-> integrate.. and on and on and on..
We need time between experiences to really reflect on what has just happened, on how our capacity to hold the energy has increased, on how more patient, more loving, more understanding we are becoming..
And I believe this is what's happening to everybody. I really would like to appeal to everyone to start sharing your true life stories, TRUE experiences of your OWN spiritual journey with others.
First of all it will help you to really re-member and integrate experiences you haven't yet integrated and it will help others to relate to your story and to see that you're actually experiencing the same thing in a different way.
How do I know? Because I see more and more people that experience the same things as I do, but you know how I know that? Because I talk to them honestly about my own experiences and more often then not they are like "You know, I've had a very similar experience almost the same time you've had yours."
So the ball is starting to roll really fast right about now and it's time for everyone to "step there game up" right about now. But I don't even have to say that because you are and messages like this are the best indicator that YOU ARE NOT CRAZY and WHAT IS HAPPENING TO YOU IS REAL. There just couldn't be such a mass halucination, or could it?
Nevertheless, living life is now becoming so much more fucking exciting than ever before that you might be scared that you might wake up in a different dimension one day and be afraid to go to sleep.
I know I was after a week of opening my sexual and "feeling" channels about two weeks ago that I just went to my roommates room at 2 am in the morning because I felt like I might not wake up in this dimension the next morning. Every time I closed my eyes I felt spinning and like "falling in" the blackness of the darkness behind my eyelids.
But I got through it and now I'm integrating this experience into my daily life and it is awesome. My energy level has increased so drastically that now I'm able to have multiple orgasm without no problem, which wasn't the case three weeks ago.
So aqumarine, don't worry. There is a whole bunch of people like you having those experiences and all you need to do is follow your intuition and your excitement and, I believe, you will be fine.
It is the most excitig time to be living, EVER! I just can't get enough if it!!!
answered 29 Dec '10, 21:47
The term retreat has several related meanings, all of which have in common the notion of safety or temporarily removing oneself from one's usual environment in order to become immersed in a particular subject matter
sounds like you were able to take the time for yourself and thats important to "unplug" sometimes. Just to stand back and look around for 2 days is a wonderful thing.
answered 29 Dec '10, 22:36
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