I understand that the dark or shadow side of 'reality' is neccessary and vital. In my desire to attune myself to 'all-that-is" i have invited understanding of the + and - sides of life.

recently, this has led me to witness the shadow side of myself and loved ones.

How do i go a about the task of 'being' more illuminated without examining the negative patterns and potentialities we hold in an effort to avoid them?

asked 10 Jan '11, 18:40

all2gethernow's gravatar image


edited 10 Jan '11, 18:51

Barry%20Allen's gravatar image

Barry Allen ♦♦


The dark side won't hurt you, the fear of it will.

(10 Jan '11, 20:01) The Traveller

It is not as much as necessary as it is hard to avoid stumbling upon it. When you break free from all the dogma within every "system" of "How to" and examine yourself without a script, you will see that it is impossible to be "good" like an angel without self-deception or bad like the devil without tormenting your own soul. And if you ask guidance from your higher self as to why so much conflict exists within you, the knowledge of the real nature of this place opens up. Most get scared and run back to church. But the church can't do for you what you must do on your own. That is to wake up.

(11 Jan '11, 03:03) The Traveller

Ask for you to be protected always and ask to be woken up to the truth of this reality. When that request is granted you will naturally awaken to both sides of the spirit. You will find evil where you least expected and likewise good in the most unusual places. Then you will be confused for everything you thought you could trust is mostly deception. And you will have no choice but to trust the voice within. For it will always "TRY" to keep you safe, IF you listen to it.

(11 Jan '11, 03:03) The Traveller

Thank you Traveler. Upon the fourth reading of your insightful comment, I conclude that it is most important to trust the voice within. Right? This site is a miracle!

(11 Jan '11, 03:40) all2gethernow

"the dark or shadow side", contains amongst other things personal memories and those parts of our character that we have not yet been able to express in a satisfactory constructive manner ... it's also known as the personal unconscious and can be explored in many ways ... analysis of resistances, conflicts, situations, dream interpretation, increased awareness ...

(05 Apr '15, 02:44) jaz

once you see the dark side it is no longer dark ... once you see clearly you become free to choose

(07 Apr '15, 01:38) jaz
showing 1 of 6 show 5 more comments

Don't try to avoid them and try to examine them! ALLOW All that is happening to BE happening the way it is, no matter if it's just 'in your head' or in physical reality around you.

The fact is that most people don't want to see the not-so-light part of life. They think if they don't see it it will go away.

I like a story about a monk who used to meditate for 20 years in solitude in a cave. After 20 years of meditation and achievieng what he thought 'enlightenment', he decided to go out in the 'real world'. So he went to the nearest town and upon first woman he saw he instantly had an erection.

The monk felt ashamed and disgusted with himself, feeling he had vasted all this time and returned to the cave, where he was all alone.

The thing is that when you are on a consciously choosen spiritual path you will not leave ANY stone unturned eventually, because the more 'shit' you consciously bring into your life, the more in-singhts you can have into those experiences and to finally know that it is all you and it has been you all along. At least that's how it is for me.

Right now I can't remember when I got really angry with someone. I mean, the feeling shows up from time to time but I really don't priject it anymore on the people who are the igniters of those feelings. I know that the way I feel is my responsibility and it is caused by a corrupt belief system - a belief system not alligned with my true, natural self.

And on the other hand that understanding makes me feel understanding and love for myself. I know that if it is their it was my choice to experience it in my life and now it's my choice if I finally want to let go of it, simply because it doesn't serve me anymore.

And the more I do it that way the easier it is to transmute those challenges into insights until a time I believe will come one day, when it will be so easy that I will just laugh exactly at the time the negative feeling or thought will come up, and change it instantly, inside my head. That will begin a new chapter in my life, but until that day comes I'm having all the time I can with the feelings of - sadness, anger, envy, unworthiness, lack of trust, being a victim, poverty issues and so on.

In fact I really, just like you, invite them into my life and I do it because the faster I do it the faster I will get over it and start playing the game with new skills and experiences. Also I believe that there is no escaping that and the more you try to supress this side of your nature the more it will haunt you and become a burden.

So, practically, what do I do when it happens? I try to stay centered and breathe, breathe, breathe.. I examine myself and say that it's ok and that I will never let myself hurt me, because I believe that no other being can hurt me but myself. And that helped me get through some really scary shit -- once I even was afraif to go asleep for I felt I would not wake up in this dimension.

But most of the time those are confrontations in my normal life with my family members and friends. I can see most of them changing and they sometimes need someone who have been where they are now, who have had let go old beliefs that they are still clinging on too and they want my help.

So I make myself available for them by being centered and understanding of what they are going through and that in my opinion is enough. They will change anyway but that is in my opinion the fastest and easiest way for all.


answered 10 Jan '11, 19:05

wildlife's gravatar image


Thanks for sharing wildlife :)

(10 Jan '11, 19:23) Michaela

"...it is all you and has been you all the time."

"I will never let myself hurt me"

"breathe, breathe, breathe.."

Ahhhhh :)

(11 Jan '11, 04:11) Hu Re

You used a key word yourself, and that is witness. Witness this shadow side but don't buy into it, by either analyzing it or trying to avoid it - it really only holds power if you give it. By merely watching it and feeling it without feeding it with thoughts or action, it will soon give up and retreat until eventually it will cease to come calling.

And know that, if it helps, it's okay to express it in a healthy manner through art, writing etc.


answered 10 Jan '11, 19:01

Michaela's gravatar image


Thanks Michela :)

(12 Jan '11, 16:29) all2gethernow

You're very welcome :)

(12 Jan '11, 17:53) Michaela

Turn on an local news at 6PM, at least in the US

Then you can see examples of how darkness can manifest itself, dig deeper and then look for the how and why.

Then learn from those unfortunate actions/situations.


answered 10 Jan '11, 19:33

Back2Basics's gravatar image


There is a saying: if you play with fire you will get burnt, but in the same token, if you know how to control the fire you can save the day! Knowledge is power, and it is how you use the power that you have will determine your fate in life; and as the saying goes a man will reap what he sows. The reality is we do have choices, so you get to choose how you can take control of the dark or light sides!


answered 11 Jan '11, 07:45

Inactive%20User's gravatar image

Inactive User ♦♦

yes everything as positive and negative in them look at the yin and yang symbole or at a white tiger! some people fight with them self inside and some just unite the opposite so those 2 energy work together in unity let the 2 side to there job and use your free will to make the right choice!the part of you with the more positive know more the positive and the part of you with the negative know more of the negative! even a good men as equal amount of negative energy in him it is the way that he use those energy that makes him a good men!


answered 22 Apr '11, 06:39

white%20tiger's gravatar image

white tiger

a fire can keep you worm or burn you it is how you use it that makes the difference

(22 Apr '11, 06:42) white tiger

who can defeat him self?

(22 Apr '11, 06:52) white tiger
Click here to create a free account

If you are seeing this message then the Inward Quest system has noticed that your web browser is behaving in an unusual way and is now blocking your active participation in this site for security reasons. As a result, among other things, you may find that you are unable to answer any questions or leave any comments. Unusual browser behavior is often caused by add-ons (ad-blocking, privacy etc) that interfere with the operation of our website. If you have installed these kinds of add-ons, we suggest you disable them for this website



Asked: 10 Jan '11, 18:40

Seen: 1,266 times

Last updated: 07 Apr '15, 01:38

Follow this question

By Email:

Once you sign in you will be able to subscribe for any updates here



Answers and Comments

Markdown Basics

  • *italic* or _italic_
  • **bold** or __bold__
  • link:[text](http://url.com/ "title")
  • image?![alt text](/path/img.jpg "title")
  • numbered list: 1. Foo 2. Bar
  • to add a line break simply add two spaces to where you would like the new line to be.
  • basic HTML tags are also supported