I recently got offered a job which would solve all my problems once and for all. On face value it seems as if the Universe has presented the solution to all my financial problems and I should jump at it. However I find my self in a dilemma. I have been my own boss for almost 20 years now and I have figured out that my top most personal value is independence, if I take up this position will I be compromising my own value? Is this job offer actually the Universe presenting me with a solution or one more test to see if I can remain true to myself? I have a lost of mental blocks against working in a structured environment and reporting to someone else, so is this the Universe trying to get me out of my comfort zone for growth or is this fear my sub-conscious telling me not to go this route?

I am very confused and would appreciate if someone could help me identify how to go about taking a decision on this matter.

asked 07 Feb '12, 05:31

I%20Think%20Therefore%20I%20Am's gravatar image

I Think Therefore I Am

edited 07 Feb '12, 05:55

Barry%20Allen's gravatar image

Barry Allen ♦♦

Lots of valuable advice here. I'll just throw in a perspective that I don't see mentioned here explicitly...

Question: Which one to choose?

Answer: It doesn't matter :)

When I first heard this approach to decision-making from Abraham, I didn't find it particularly satisfying. And they even acknowledged it wouldn't sound particularly satisfying to physically-focused humans but, over the years, I've come to appreciate the wisdom of it.

You're never going to reach a place in your life where everything is "right" for you - because your life is constantly evolving.

You're never going to reach a place in your life where everything you want to get "done" in your life is done for you - because your life is constantly evolving.

So if you can never get it wrong, and you can never get it done, it's not about the "destination", it's about the "journey" and how much you are enjoying that eternal journey. You can make any choice the right choice if you decide to align with it because you can choose to make any thought in your life a dominant thought.

Making decisions is what causes life to flow through you. Desires are really just decisions. So from that perspective, every decision is a good decision.

It's only when you make no decision at all that you stifle your life-force, and therefore your "journey".

So my advice would be to choose either but once you've chosen it, deliberately align with the choice you have made and don't split your energies by trying to second-guess yourself afterwards. You can always choose something else later from that new stable vibrational place you have aligned with.

Think of it like a car satellite navigation system. If you come to a fork in the road, you can quite happily ignore the direction the SatNav is telling you to go and go in the opposite direction. I do this quite a lot with mine just for fun :) That's because you know that once you've seen what's down the road you selected, the navigation system will always guide you from there back to your next selection without judgement.

The SatNav simply doesn't care how you got where you currently are, it just guides you to the next location...it's the same for the Inner You...it really doesn't care how you got where you are either...it will just guide you to the next location...eternally.

It's not the decision that matters, it is the fact that you have made a decision that matters.


answered 08 Feb '12, 05:03

Stingray's gravatar image


@Stingray - knew you would give sound advice as always:-) You are right it is about the journey and accepting the job would take me on a whole new level of growth n experiences in my profession. I guess my unease was more my own resistance to embark on the journey - a kind of self-sabotage but I'm going to flow with what the Universe is sending my way and find new forks on my road.

(08 Feb '12, 05:50) I Think Therefore I Am

[…] if you follow your heart, your heart is connected directly to your higher self and soul. And your soul knows better than anyone, for you. It knows better than the wisest, or longest living entity in this universe. Because it IS you, it is part of you and it is what you need. So follow the heart and you will never be lead wrong.

This was a quote that was so profound from Treb, we used it in the opening cover for the book we did. "Benevolent Hybrid Reptilian Humans" by Jefferson Vascardi and Rob Gauthier.

here is the pic

alt text

Treb Bor yit-NE

love n light



answered 07 Feb '12, 14:18

TReb%20Bor%20yit-NE's gravatar image

TReb Bor yit-NE

edited 17 Sep '12, 21:20


I couldn't agree more - follow you heart!

(07 Feb '12, 14:38) ele

ty my friend, nice to meet u ele. love n light

(07 Feb '12, 14:53) TReb Bor yit-NE

@Treb Bor yit-NE

Hey - nice to meet you too - we think alike. I think you will like this quote by Gary Zukav which I also posted under Wades answer.

"You cannot find your soul with your mind, you must use your heart. You must know what you are feeling. If you don't know what you are feeling, you will create unconsciously."

"The soul of an individual; your soul and my soul, is that part of us that is immortal."

(08 Feb '12, 05:14) ele

Do what Rob said :)

(08 Feb '12, 05:15) AboveBelow

ty all of u, i am greatfull to meet those of u ihavnt before, this si a quote from my source, i am a channeler and this was somthing that stood out so profoundly ,, i put it as the introduction to teh book, it is my favoruite quote, one of my all time in fact of all material. love n light 2 u all

(08 Feb '12, 19:59) TReb Bor yit-NE

@ ele,,, ty very much , i do love the quote, ty and it is great to meet u 2

(13 Feb '12, 18:29) TReb Bor yit-NE
showing 2 of 6 show 4 more comments

In a situation like this I would take a little time and think about all the aspects of the different career paths. I would sit down first and make a list of positives and negatives regarding this new job offer. I would also do the same with the positives and negatives for the current work you do.

By doing this, you are narrowing down your likes and dislikes beforehand, instead of just making a snap decision that you may regret later down the road. It will be fairly easy to see which direction you are leaning towards by what you have written down. This easy process might give you a little guidance on which path to choose.

Now what I just mentioned is only small piece of the decision making puzzle. You and you alone have to follow your own instincts and go with what feels right to you. Accept as much advice as you possibly can, but let your emotions guide you into the direction that will benefit your life the most.

You mentioned your heart and mind leading you in different directions. Well which one has lead you down the right path most of the time? Think back to prior decisions that you have made and try to remember if you used your heart or your mind to make a decision and which one worked out the best for you.

We mention "how you feel" quite a bit on this website, but it really all comes down to just that. Sometimes it can just be to simple to accept in our brains. I personally like to go with how I feel as much as I can, and that usually involves following my heart. It just depends where your vibrational output and beliefs currently reside and what decision making process works best for you. This is where the negative and positive lists that I mentioned above come in. Whatever is in the positive list is what you feel good about and whatever is in the negative list feels not so great.

You could also ask your subconscious mind which career path is the best choice for you before you go to bed at night. If you put some focus on this and really have a desire to get an answer, you may have a particular dream or even get a moment of inspiration when you wake up in the morning. It is an easy technique for "letting go" because you are holding no resistance while you are asleep.

If you follow your instincts I believe you will be just fine. Good luck with whatever decision you feel inspired to make!


answered 07 Feb '12, 13:41

Cory's gravatar image


First, how did this make you feel when you first found out about this opportunity? What was your FIRST thought? Yes? NO? If you heard a yes or no, it was your gut instinct. It was your inner wisdom speaking to you & if you follow your intuition - it will be the RIGHT decision.

Like I stated earlier, I completely agree with Trey. Follow your heart. In addition to the reasons Trey stated - I think, NO, I KNOW it's possible to over analysis it & your mind has a way of talking you out of something your heart knows is best. If you don't believe me, go back & read your post.

Follow your passion, what will make you happiest? If your left brained - do breath work & activate your right hemisphere. Be still - Meditate.

Don't you think your business will become more profitable? The offer alone should make you feel even more confident. Success follows confidence. The other company obviously has faith in you as well as a very high regard for your work to offer you this opportunity. Imagine how many others want this too. Money is great; but being happy is even more important, to you and also to the ones who live with you. If you are happy, doing what you love; your vibes will attract abundance..............

BTW - you already have your answer, read your post again. Your answer is there - what did you say you value most? Stop thinking about it and follow your heart with NO regrets.. LOA


answered 08 Feb '12, 04:39

ele's gravatar image


do you prefer to be your own boss? does it work for you? when you are boss you depend on your client and employe so are you really independent? maybe that his the realisation that you need to make? that you stay your own boss or go work for someone else is only a choice in both case you are still dependent or does your ego blind you to this truth? we are all here making choice not only you all the choice we make affect other people and will affect each of us in different way make your choice in harmony with your mind and heart remove that little darkness in your ego that blind you to the truth. experience and enjoy.


answered 07 Feb '12, 16:12

white%20tiger's gravatar image

white tiger


Good perspective @White Tiger, my ego was blinding me.

(08 Feb '12, 05:53) I Think Therefore I Am

I'd get the job. What do you have to lose? If you don't like the job, just quit. You can go back to being your own boss. That's all Okay! We will never know what the universe wants until we actually take some action(Accepting or reject the job). So don't try to guess what the universe wants or have some high expectations because humans are just bad bad predictors. Maybe the reason why the universe gave you this job is so you can post here and hear our thoughts and not really about the job itself. Who knows? No one. Not until we're done that we understand what was really happening. Good luck!


answered 07 Feb '12, 17:17

Ali00's gravatar image


just another perfect unfolding. love and light.

(07 Feb '12, 17:50) Roy

@Ali00 you are right - what do I have to lose? I need to give it a try and if it doesn't work well I would be no worse off than I am already. Thanks.

(08 Feb '12, 05:52) I Think Therefore I Am

The heart should always be tempered by the mind. For example you just break up with someone and your heart is saying, "I hate him! I hate life! I am just going to jump in front of a train!" The mind is saying, "HEY THERE! Whoa hold on lets just calm down here a bit! There is no need to to get ourselves killed over him. He was jerk anyway why would you want him, there are better guys just waiting for you out there! Don't be so hasty, think before you act!"

If we do not control our emotions, we become a slave to our emotions. This was going to be my answer in full but Jai pointed out to me though that the mind as well needs the heart to temper it. For example doing something you hate that is making you miserable because it will pay the bills. Recent example is some drug sellers were busted in the front page for having a meth lab. The mind says this is a logical way to make good money quickly. The heart says, "No this is wrong we'll get into trouble and this hurts people, no don't do this." In that case the heart needs to be heard by the mind.

So both heart and mind need to be in balance before a decision is to be made.


answered 07 Feb '12, 15:58

Wade%20Casaldi's gravatar image

Wade Casaldi

edited 07 Feb '12, 16:02

@Wade Casaldi

No, No, No, Wade, my friend! You have it backwards. As for your example - my mind would be saying those things; but my heart would NEVER let me take my life. I understand to master Karate; you had to be in control of your emotions. For all other matters, NO - follow your heart. To quote Gary Zukav "You cannot find your soul with your mind, you must use your heart. You must know what you are feeling. If you don't know what you are feeling, you will create unconsciously."

(08 Feb '12, 04:55) ele

For the first paragraph I could have just as easily and more accurately stated emotion needs to be tempered with logic. The second paragraph logic needs to be tempered with emotion. Both need balance.

(08 Feb '12, 05:02) Wade Casaldi

@Wade Casaldi I agree. Socrates said 'a virtue is the median between two vices' just living from the emotional plane would make us impulsive and probably looney and living purely according to logic would give us paralysis of analysis. Both need to go hand in hand.

(08 Feb '12, 05:56) I Think Therefore I Am

@wade - yay, did it again - lol ! please read my comment again & see if you can find a different perspective. I was trying to make 2 points & evidently did not make myself clear on either one. Although I did not say it in my comment, I agree with the majority of your post. There is a need for balance & no, you can't allow emotions to rule your life.wade -

(09 Feb '12, 00:03) ele

life... continued... I would never encourage anyone to act on their emotions; especially negative ones like rage or anger. I did not mean to imply anyone should act on their emotions. Feelings & emotions are not the same. Please read my comment again.

(09 Feb '12, 00:04) ele

I didn't paste All the quote - there are 3 more lines " If you are unconscious of an aspect of yourself; if it operates outside your field of awareness, that aspect has power over you."

What can I say, I'm easily distracted anymore.

(09 Feb '12, 00:05) ele

Lol Ele yes I know about being distracted easily. I have adult ADD myself apparently. :-)

(13 Feb '12, 21:56) Wade Casaldi
showing 2 of 7 show 5 more comments

Life is too hard to enjoy; the things of the heart are too hard to enjoy when debts and worries are pressing upon one. I say take the job.

Although I liked my job through the years and had many good experiences, I would not say it was my "dream career". However, the nice income from that job allowed me to follow my heart in many other ways: travel, music, animals, material things, and it erased a lot of worry for me. I am so glad that I didn't hold out and wait for the "dream career" and for "perfection" because perhaps I would still be waiting, and much poorer in so many ways.

Best wishes!


answered 08 Feb '12, 18:00

LeeAnn%201's gravatar image

LeeAnn 1

The ego hates change. That is where your dilemma starts. Ego has created a structure that serves its need for comfort and safety. Now you are being presented with a change after all these years. So, your ego is pushing all of your fear and doubt buttons. This is normal. You are being presented with a chance to gain a better understanding of how your ego works, and how much influence it has in your reality. So, universe is giving you the opportunity to let go of ego fear, to let go of the rigid structure of the past years, and allow your joy to be expressed in a greater fashion. So, letting your heart have a greater influence on your decisions is the opportunity you are being presented with. Your heart brought this new job to you, now you need to let your heart make the decision of change, and not your ego.


answered 08 Feb '12, 19:32

Jesse's gravatar image


do you listen before you choose
or take time to see
brooding over the obtained data,
will you let intuition have a say

does it need to be
either or one hundred percent
will points of intersection do
yes, what do we choose


answered 08 Feb '12, 19:42

fred's gravatar image


well i would give myself a break for a bit and try to forget about this decision for a few hours and watch tv, get engrossed in something else and then when ur feeling a bit relaxed and detached, do a quick visualisation ( or you could do this for real in the morning after you wake up).

Sit quiet and visualise yourself waking up in the morning with no-one else in the house - they have all gone out; then see yourself going into the room where you go after you get dressed - eg computer room or breakfast room, wherever. You see 2 folded pieces of paper on a table. This is where the answer to your question lies and the answer is binding. One of these pieces of paper, has inside it the written words: ''you will take the job.'' The other piece of paper has the words: ''you will stay your own boss'' Imagine yourself being ordered by God (or whatever your personal God is) to pick up one of the papers and know that that is what you will be doing for the next 3 months. No question. You pick one up; look down at the paper and see what is written there. THEN FEEL WHAT YOU ARE FEELING IN YOUR GUT Is there a feeling of secret relief or disappointment coming from your gut/heart when you read what you will be doing? Be quick in trying to ascertain what your gut feels; because it will only take a few seconds for your mind to start whirring and coming up with all the other scenarios.

Like the others said, I'd go with what your heart wants; Even if you don't go with what your heart wants, be aware why you are over-riding it.. Nothing is for ever so don't feel whatever situation you make you are stuck in for ever... could just see how it goes.. If you feel you will regret not taking this job for years to come, then be aware of that... Say you don't really want this job, then maybe its not this one or nothing... something else may come along that is more a compromise of what u want, if you become more specific about the details...ask for exactly what you want and it might come up 4 u!


answered 13 Feb '12, 19:00

jodie's gravatar image


edited 13 Feb '12, 19:07

Perhaps my new question about "When in Doubt" will help a little...I hope!

It sounds like the Universe has issued you a personal challenge.

I faced this when I was raising my fur children, and had to be a stay-at-home Mom because my ex traveled Monday Through Friday out-of-town...

I calculated out every cost that a job would entail when we were faced with almost poverty-level living...Babysitters for four kids with a ten-year span in ages (including an infant); new work clothes; an extra car and car payment; fast food; everything....

It worked out that I would have made a profit of $.50 an hour, or $20.00 a week at best....I decided that I could cut that out of the budget, and stayed home with my kids.

I do not regret the decision, but my ex apparently secretly resented this. (But that is another story...boring.) I did not miss anything...first steps, first words, report cards, going to the library and checking out 40-50 books per week (not a typo)...I got to be there. It meant the world to me, as it turns out.

Now, they are all spread all over the country, and I am glad I had those years with them.

But I did doubt my decision many times...and just kept waiting for God to say, "Now!"

Hope all of this mumbo-jumbo helps even a little bit.




answered 13 Feb '12, 18:56

Jaianniah's gravatar image


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Asked: 07 Feb '12, 05:31

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Last updated: 17 Sep '12, 21:20

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