I have been able to experience some dramatic positive changes in my behavior. Have been thinking about how this may have come about. Would like to begin on a few basics that seem to fit in with ideas of Source and Self.
I accept the idea that I can not change another person's behavior, to mold it into something that pleases me. I have difficulty in changing MY own behavior into something that pleases me. Why do I do things that turn out dis-useful to me? Say the wrong things? Hurt myself or others? Can I really examine my self, my motives, my actions with my conscious mind?
Even if I get to the basics of why I may be doing some behavior, can I change it? Does cognitive therapy really work? I really do not think so. Do I care about "why" more than changing behavior into more useful loving directions?
I have only a fingernail grip about what goes on inside my computer (or inside myself), but I know I can run a utility that will clean and fix my computer's problems. How about a utility that will clean my problems?
Maybe I have one and here is how it works. As a businessman I like to see my inner as an office building filled with people doing different jobs; the trillions of conscious cells within me, each doing something good for me.
I begin with the postulate that all these cell-people are working for my benefit. They have my best in mind. But, maybe they have limited options(?)
When I was a child, my mother told me not to go out in the rain without and umbrella or I would catch cold. I know my mother loved me and wanted me to be comfortable, but her method of insuring this was to tell me I would get sick otherwise. I tried to change her presentation, to not say I would get sick, but to say that I would be more comfortable. You can imagine how far I got with that! She stuck with her limited options. Maybe we all tend to do this unless prompted in the right way.
So lets say there is this part of you that, for its own very good reasons, makes you think negative thoughts. And you say to that part, "stop making me think negative thoughts!" I think that part would resist as my mother resisted. However, in order for it to keep you safe, it makes me think negative thoughts. It just needs some more options, some more tools to help you get the goodies.
I tried to have a talk with my insides, but met resistance. I wanted to know how the digestive process really worked. I got a clear answer saying, "Not gonna tell you! Remember when you decided to control your heart beat and got it down so low that I had a hard time maintaining the rest of your body? You want to know how the digestive process works so you can meddle with that, eat two dozen cream filled donuts and have them whizz through without making you fat or sick. It could be done, but it would triple my load. So I ain't saying nuthin!"
Hmm, doesn't trust me. I understand. I can be an inventive meddler. The part that made me inappropriately angry won't even tell me why it does it, just that it thinks it is necessary for my overall health and well-being. Maybe it is trying to protect me from bad people? I don't - can't -- really know. But it wants me to be happy.
Who does it trust? The other cell-people? My Source? Universal mind Source? Well, let's put that concept to work. Here is what I have been doing when I recognize a behavior that I find irrational and disuseful, like Road Rage. I once had that badly! Someone cuts me off in traffic? They are going to get a Lesson with a capital "L"! That I put my family, my wife, myself in danger did not matter at that time. Yeah, I went nuts and no amount of inner talk could change my responses!
So I had a different kind of talk with mySelf. I know that my inner parts know how to work together. Somehow, some of them were programmed by my parents, by my environment, by my teachers with limited options.
I ran this utility.
That is it.
An amazing thing happened, I quit road rage, like I never had it. Like I have been mellow on the road all the time. No effort. Default options have changed at a deep inner level. I don't really notice when people cut me off, though, for a while my wife cringed, fearing my reaction was going to be violent.
The violence I once felt is gone. It seems like a surreal day-dream that I ever felt this way.
As far as the "why" goes, it is really unimportant, but can be dug up if desired. I worked with a woman once who was very much over weight. Diets were useless. Will power ineffectual. We ran this utility and she began losing weight, it came off slowly, she ate what she wanted, but found her eating habits had changed. She no longer craved the fat-producing foods. She experienced no feelings of sacrifice. The weight melted away until she achieved her target weight and she maintained it there. No effort.
She came back with a burning question, wanted to know WHY? We put her into a deep trance and what ultimately emerged was that a part of her, was afraid she would be unable to resist seduction attempts from men outside her marriage, and that this could destroy her marriage, so it kept her fat and unattractive. That part found better ways of stopping potential suitors. It still did its job, but in the best way to make her happy and healthy. She did not need to be fat anymore.
I do not suggest this is an underlying reason people gain or lose weight. Each person is different.
Will this utility work for anyone? Don't know. Works for me. I am posting this as Wikki Community because I am not really asking a question. Like to have your feedback.
I would like to address a few points of your post. And please note, I have wrote my comments on your ideas the moment I read them. I didn't read the whole article first, because due to its length I was a bit afraid of not being able to go back in the same depth of thought that I could exercise while holding each thought in my mind at the moment it was provoked and expanded. Upon finishing reading your post, I realized that you have addressed some of your questions in your own way. But here it goes anyway.
Can I really examine my self, my motives, my actions with my conscious mind?
Do I care about "why" more than changing behavior into more useful loving directions?
How about a utility that will clean my problems?
The part that made me inappropriately angry won't even tell me why it does it, just that it thinks it is necessary for my overall health and well-being. Maybe it is trying to protect me from bad people? I don't - can't -- really know. But it wants me to be happy.
We are consistently inundated with sensory input. Our subconscious filters out about 95% of this as being unnecessary. The filters are our default belief patterns. These belief patterns were programmed into us by ourselves, mentors, environment, etc. Some have little logic behind them, but they can be very powerful. Mostly these patterns were not designed by the conscious mind and they can make you feel good (useful) or feel bad (disuseful).
I found that, for me, and this is the only perspective I can have, my subconscious is not easily changed by my conscious mind. In fact it seems that my subconscious mind throws up smokescreens when I try to apply logic in regard to changing it.
I can force myself into different behaviors, but this does not have long lasting change. The conscious mind is a flighty thing compared to the subconscious. Always running hither and thither while the subconscious mind proceeds in silent solemn dignity. How long would I last if my subconscious immediately responded to every whim I have? If I had to make conscious the things my subconscious mind does automatically, Breathing, heartbeat, etc.
And do I care "why" I react in certain ways? No. I just want outcomes, happy outcomes. For me, "why" is irrelevant and I am not getting a straight answer from my subconscious anyhow!
A recent example is that I found a person very abrasive. Really rubbed me the wrong way. Got under my skin and I became angry, unreasonably angry, but, I felt it was justifiable anger. I felt I was RIGHT! All my logic pointed to the absolute fact, in my mind, that I was absolutely correct in my assessment. Use them as a mirror to work on myself? Are you freaking kidding me! I was right! They were wrong! A lot of stuff entered my mind about how to prove them wrong and myself right!
Then I realized I was going around with a tight solar plexus. Good indication to me that I was not happy! So I decided to ignore them. I even found software that would allow me to block seeing their name or comments on the site I was otherwise enjoying. An "Ignore Button."
But I was still feeling pinched off from my Source. Not only feeling pinched off, but a lot of other things in my life that usually worked very well, were not working well. Karma? Retribution? Mistakes that I normally would not make? Consequences.
I believe it was that I was not well connected to my Source, my Inspiration, my Guide, my God and my happiness. Me screwing up me! No one else! I am the Cause and Continuation.
So I ran myself through the above process. The next morning I woke up and decided to remove the blocking software and have another look at this person. *There had been a miraculous change in him!! He was making lots of sense! Good, eloquent, intelligent, meaningful remarks! Hot damn, he had made all the changes I wanted, overnight!
I searched his previous posts. I found abrasive nastiness! Sure! But It came from me! FROM ME! I began editing my posts.
Do I really give a rat's ass about WHY I felt negative before? Big, fat NO! Do I know WHY I felt badly before? Another big, fat NO! In fact asking that question tended to bring up some nasty past stuff. Solar plexus crunch, oops, ouchies!
He did not change. I did. My perceptions, my responses, my beliefs, my filters changed. I made a partner with my subconscious mind ("Max"), let Max find some other options and use them when Max feels it is best to do so and the patterns changed!
I don't know what happened. I really, really don't care! Did I hold it up to Truth? Seek? Knock? Experience? I DID hold it up to Joy, and I experienced a change. Do I now like everything he says, not everything, but most of it and when I don't like something, I have a look inside myself.
I am not saying this process outlined above will work for everyone, nor that everyone should use it. In the beginning I had little belief it could do anything. Did not make a lot of conscious mind sense, but it has worked for me.
Often I don't feel it the next morning. Usually I am just cruising along and enjoying life and I have a momentary thought that I used to react in less functional ways.
My wife has begun to believe that Road Rage is no longer and factor, but it took her a while to embed that belief. For a while, she cringed when someone cut me off, fearing that I was just holding it in with pressure building inside me. I felt a mild amusement as though I was experiencing a deja vu dreamlike state. No adverse reactions to Road Rage anymore, at all.
What happened inside me, I don't care, but when that solar plexus begins to tighten I am going to stop and run the process!
answered 01 Apr '12, 10:56
Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground." http://bible.cc/genesis/1-26.htm
and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. http://bible.cc/colossians/3-10.htm
you have free will and can make all the change that you need. be the light that you can be. experience and enjoy.
answered 14 Mar '12, 07:52
Let me give an example of conscious and subconscious mind interplay. As part of a demonstration of hyphosis, I asked a young woman to take part in an experiment on "Cognitive Recognition."
I hypnotized her in front of an audience. In a deep trance I gave the command that when she saw me touch my face with my hand, she would unbutton the top button of her blouse. When I put my hand in my lap, she would re-button it. She was to consciously forget the command.
Brought her out and began talking with her about other subjects. As I touched my face, she unbuttoned the top button, then as I lowered my hand she re-buttoned. We did this seveal times until I drew her attention to her actions. She stated that she was not aware that she was doing this.
We continued talk and she continued her actions, but there was some tension. The audience was chuckling, which added to her frustration. I asked again. She stated there was a draft and she was cold, then the draft stopped and she was alright. The audience began to laugh.
I stilled them and asked again. She became angry and told me that she was really feeling sick and to quit bothering her! I told her about the command and the buttons. She was a good sport about it. I gave her a few minutes while we talked and then touched my face, her hand rose about halfway and she consciously stopped it. We did this several times more and each time her hand rose in varying degrees before she stopped it.
My point was that when she did not understand the situation, the stimulus and response command, her conscious mind tried to find a correspondence, but she only offered conscious mind excuses.
Even when I told her the story, she continued to have a subconscious mind response, however with some effort, she was able to control it. But she still responded until I took her back into trance and removed the command.
I don't feel comfortable in dealing with dis-useful response pattern by using hypnosis. It can work, but I like a more personally interactive method in which the person uses their inner processes to make changes that they find beneficial is more effective in the long run.
Though I like certain therapy processes and appreciate the good therapists do, I am also aware of the biases therapists can bring to the table. They sometimes feel the client needs to change in ways the therapist feels appropriate. I want the person, in concert with their parts to find their own solutions and I believe we have a natural tendency toward joyful answers.
I find that there are deep seated responses and belief systems in the psyche and that some of these we do not find useful, and these patterns are extremely difficult to reach with the conscious mind.
I did a lot of work with returning Vietnam vets. These young men and women, many of them in their teens, had developed deep seated problems. Phobic response patterns. Traditional therapeutic methods either worked very slowly or not at all.
Though my studies and research are still in the infancy stage, I think that a way of connecting Source, conscious and subconscious can result in dramatic positive change.
answered 14 Mar '12, 11:44
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