This question stems partly from a conflict I had with another IQ member. I was very uncomfortable with the whole comment made about what I wrote, and I realized that what I had written had nothing to do with making Peace. So I deserved what I received- which was more controversy.

I spent my childhood trying to keep the Peace in my family. My Dad had a drinking problem while I was young, and it often fell to me (being Daddy's girl) to calm his rages, to get him to sleep, to keep him from beating my Mom or my sisters. I grew up craving Peace, and I finally have found it within my relationship with Wade. This is the first Peace I have known.

I used to sit for hours in closets, in the dark, away from everyone, trying to soothe myself. The pain was awful, and when I get myself in trouble due my temper, it makes me very mad. I hate, hate, hate that I want Peace and yet get mad and lose my temper.

I sometimes stay away from IQ because I dislike being sucked into controversy (even if I bring it onto myself). I wish IQ was a bit more calm, and that the people here did not always jump all over each other.

I leave you with a painting I did of one of my alters. It explains how I felt as a child, and how I feel when I am not at Peace. I have posted it here before, so I apologize to those who have already seen it.

alt text


Jai ♥

asked 06 Nov '13, 05:04

Jaianniah's gravatar image


edited 06 Nov '13, 05:07


A good question.. Everyone, no matter how they see reality or what they think of themselves, should try to consciously improve how they contribute to being a positive influence to everyone they touch, and consciously minimize anything negative they can cause. I hope to see a lot of good answers to this, I think we all could learn from them.

Short answer.. Peace within, peace without. All (you especially) have great potential to help others but we must help ourselves first. "Be the change..."

(06 Nov '13, 05:09) Snow

@Snow- When I first joined IQ, I saw a great potential to make peace, and also to learn more about it. Unfortunately, I wonder if people realize how things have changed here- It sometimes seems that everyone wants the last word on everything. Thank you for the quote. 'Tis truth. Love, Jai ♥

(06 Nov '13, 05:31) Jaianniah

If your observations are true, then it means these people have an opportunity to grow and develop as individuals who we can safely assume have an interest in spirituality due to their presence here. Maybe even if they don't know the full extent themselves.

It also gives you an excellent opportunity to refine your peacemaking skills within yourself. Become a master at remaining at peace even when you see this, or worse. Maybe they're here as a lesson for your sake in your own peace. :) ^_^y

(06 Nov '13, 05:56) Snow

regular meditation can bring equanimity in your emotions -even though this sounds cliche they say Silence is the answer. many times if you think your emotions are getting out of hand resist writing something judgmental. You even writing in the comment that "It sometimes seems that everyone wants the last word on everything" is a judgement. Its ok to write that if your energy is cool about it coz its true sometimes. But since you are regretting later and its bringing resistive feelings in u.

(06 Nov '13, 13:51) abrahamloa

@jaianniah if you know your weak point work on them and make them become your strength. how you will ask? simply by learning from your past experience applying the truth in the present and making your future a lot better. why put wall to take them down in the future? if the wall as no purpose why even put it up? why do people put up wall? is it not for protection in or out? but when it is not needed why put a wall to create more division and problem in or out? you know better then that!

(07 Nov '13, 14:31) white tiger

@jaianniah if one does not know him self he is not at peace with him self he is lost in the darkness and is looking outside for something to make him whole and at peace with him self. he find something that work for a little while it takes is awareness away from is trouble, but the problem is not solve and when he notice the problem still there he goes look again outside for something to make him whole. often he will try the same thing that he did before in greater excess going in to extremes-

(07 Nov '13, 23:46) white tiger

brings more problems. even some one that is at peace in this world will see other people not at peace that will come to trouble is peace. at least the one that know himself knows that it is only temporary he can try to help the person find peace or if he knows that there is nothing to do just move away to the desert where there is no one to call you no name or give you no pain.

(07 Nov '13, 23:55) white tiger

is it not what jesus did? yes you will have to face your demon that darkness and the poison that torment you in the cup. what will save you a good heart and the truth nothing else. when you start to see the light that you are and learn from it you are born of water. when the water and the spirit becomes one you are born of spirit and with out fear you can enter the last narrow door and go to the kingdom of the peace makers and the pure of heart.

(08 Nov '13, 00:03) white tiger

@jaianniah great question.

(12 Nov '13, 16:55) Manny

@white tiger Great song & idea - desert can be symbolic of many places.

(12 Nov '13, 17:30) ele
showing 0 of 11 show 11 more comments

"Peace" is the very fabric of the Universe. It exists in every moment in every thing. So, why make Peace a goal when it is always available to you ? Live your life and just become aware of that ever-present Peace whenever you want to feel it.

Also, you seem to have a strong attachment to your "past" which isn't serving you.

Ask yourself this question: "If I let go of my "past" right now who would get hurt?

The answer: No-one would. :)

"If I let go of my past who would benefit from it?"

The answer: You would and everyone around You :)

How can I ensure that I am a Peace-maker?

It's futile to try and physically create the conditions for peace if your not already feeling it first.

Find ways to feel peace within you first and then that peace must reflect back to you in your physical reality. Be aware that the obstacles within you to you maintaining that peaceful vibration will also reflect back to you.



answered 06 Nov '13, 05:35

Satori's gravatar image


edited 07 Nov '13, 05:22

Explain peace in relation to meteors bombarding planets, stars exploding and imploding, black holes sucking in whole planetary systems...But maybe in death one finds peace after all.

(06 Nov '13, 09:47) CalonLan

calonlan, perhaps balance is descriptive. the harmony of a design from the top down instead of from he bottom up

(06 Nov '13, 22:11) fred

Peace is a state of being as is abundance. It's always there - it always has been. If you want peace - be peace. . There is scientific evidence to back up this feeling of calm & harmony just as the physical action of smiling has an effect on your mood & this can be documented. Great answer and great questions to ask oneself. Thanks @Satori

(07 Nov '13, 23:38) ele

@Ele-Nicely said and your welcome:)

(08 Nov '13, 09:03) Satori

Thanks @Satori ... that was nice to hear this morning. It's going to be a good day - hope yours is as well & have a great weekend.

(08 Nov '13, 10:04) ele

@Satori - This is an excellent answer, thank you for sharing. You have brought up a question I have asked myself recently, when I bumped into an old hurt that has been holding me back a few weeks ago. It was so painful, and so frightening to me, that it stuck out like a sore thumb in my life now... Well, once I bumped into it, it did anyway - I apparently had it very carefully hidden from myself. Anyway, now that it came up and I stopped and took a look at it, I did ask myself....

(22 Nov '13, 20:16) Grace

... what would it hurt if I let go of this? I was amazed at how hard it was to let go. My mind kept shying away... So that got me going, I'm a bulldog about this stuff now - I won't just tuck it away to fester again, not anymore. I stare it down till it can't hurt me anymore. I meditated on it, remembered that I am absolutely safe, and that my natural condition is peace and well-being....

(22 Nov '13, 20:21) Grace

... It was like standing on the edge of a cliff with a very strong hand rail. Nothing to fear! Just enjoy the view! That led to perfect peace, and the whole subject is bringing up a giggle in my throat now; no big deal. :)

(22 Nov '13, 20:22) Grace
showing 2 of 8 show 6 more comments

to be a peace makers it is simple get to know yourself clean the inside of the cup and love your neighbor as your self.

if you know your self you can know other, but if you do not know yourself how can you know other?

look at the Pharisees they considered them self righteous and where praising them self trying to look good on the outside but on the inside they where full of darkness poison and dead bones.

they said we would not make the error of our for father and where judging them to praise them self and see what they did, did they not do the same?

Did they properly split that pieces of wood and lift that stone?

was it not said to be better then the Pharisees?

follow the word, and the word is truth, I testify and swear by the kingdom of the peacemakers and the pure of heart that I am telling you the truth.

Let there be light, be the light that you can be, experience and enjoy.


answered 06 Nov '13, 23:24

white%20tiger's gravatar image

white tiger

edited 06 Nov '13, 23:38


I applaud your passion..

(08 Nov '13, 00:13) ele

@ele thanks for the comment, I am only telling the truth.

(12 Nov '13, 15:18) white tiger

@whitetiger I like that your messages and your passion for the truth can be felt thru the written words. I, myself am trying to know myself and to clean the inside of the cup and I am also certain when I do my eyes will be able to see the Kingdom. Thank you

(12 Nov '13, 16:51) Manny

@Manny seek you first the kingdom of God. Very truly I tell you, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless they are born of water and the Spirit.

(13 Nov '13, 00:27) white tiger
showing 2 of 4 show 2 more comments

If you had not experienced the conflict, you would not have desired peace more intensely, so, in essence, it has been a positive thing. Disagreeing with other people's opinions is not a bad thing, because if we only surround ourselves with people who only think EXACTLY as we do, we may as well just be alone. The reflection on the contrast between what we desire and what is happening now is how we clarify what we truly desire, and we can use the contrast to show us the path to achieving our desire. You desire Peace, BE PEACE.

That doesn't mean being a doormat for others, either. You may have a better answer, and you don't have to agree with everyone. Look at the examples of great peacemakers throughout history, such as Gandhi and Martin Luther King, to name two. Neither of them shied away from controversy, nor did they agree with the status quo, but nevertheless, did not deviate from their goal. We can see how they changed the world!

Forgive yourself, make peace with yourself, and LOVE yourself. Love is all there is. That's the path to peace.


answered 07 Nov '13, 18:54

Beach%20Baby's gravatar image

Beach Baby

edited 07 Nov '13, 19:05


This question is synchronous with an experience I had yesterday. I was bored and looking for something to get me out of the house, and I came across an event that resonated with me. A group was holding a group meditation for world peace, and I was immediately drawn to it. I attended, and I am still riding on the positivity of that meditation. I felt my consciousness shift.

(07 Nov '13, 19:14) Beach Baby

This is good answer too.

(07 Nov '13, 23:34) ele

Thoughts of peace, particularly in the middle of chaos, take great energy. People who can ignore the physical evidence of wars and purposely think thoughts of peace will triumph -- but in your terminology the word meek has come to mean spineless, inadequate, lacking energy.

Source: The Nature of Personal Reality (A Seth Book)


answered 07 Nov '13, 18:54

T%20A's gravatar image


edited 10 Nov '13, 18:25

By being at peace with yourself first.

It may sound paradoxical, but that peace cannot be dependent on anything outside of yourself. So when you say that you were the peacemaker in your family, what that means is that you were always trying to keep the peace, at the expense of your own internal peace.

But the only way that you can change anyone else is to be a model for that which you want others to follow, and hope that they choose to follow your example because it is attractive to them. Alas, many people will still choose the conflict, because that is what they want. And that is their choice; you have to leave that choice with them.

Nice painting.


answered 12 Nov '13, 18:04

Vesuvius's gravatar image


@Vesuvius, I agreed with you about being the model of peace and to leave upto people to decide if they want live in peace or live in conflict.

(12 Nov '13, 18:42) Manny

There are many great answers here I voted for but here is mine.

Being in karate and knowing there is no first strike in karate I decided to see if this could extend to life. In other words in life there is no first strike. This meaning that any attack or lashing out is in self defense, no matter who does even the bully.

The person lashing out is in pain, worry or fear. Something more than you is bothering her/him.

This person is trying to stop feeling pain, even if it means getting into fist-fights to drown out the pain, depression, anger, confusion, feelings of worthlessness, feelings of inadequacy. So when someone puts me down yes it hurts but that person putting me down is hurting and that makes me have compassion for him/her. This compassion makes me react in a peaceful way.


answered 07 Nov '13, 23:01

Wade%20Casaldi's gravatar image

Wade Casaldi

edited 07 Nov '13, 23:15

"If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other." ~ Mother Teresa

(08 Nov '13, 05:27) ele

@ele, I read the quote and became instantly tired of this togetherness propaganda. lol..

and I mean it, it's always something like that we have forgotten, we are lost, looking for our way home, we belong to each other... As if all we are is in a sense wrong and our life's quest is to fix it.

If I didn't know better, I'd think everyone concerned with these fantasy concepts is being delusional and doing drugs. Apropos, where does this idea of belonging to each other come from anyway?...

(08 Nov '13, 05:43) CalonLan

...I don't wanna belong to each other with some moron, or a thief or fanatic helper like Mother Teresa.Just because I'm of a certain species does mean to me that I belong with them.

It's the same hashtag like importance of family. On one side people blinding proclaim how family is above all hello there Italian mafia... on the other hand I don't see how that can be in a family full of beating, hatred, discouragement and anger.

To me my family is no more than bunch of strangers I happen to...

(08 Nov '13, 05:49) CalonLan

...know by their names and have some information about. I don't see how being born within a certain circle of people make you bound to that circle. The idea of togetherness sickens me, especially since there is no relevant reason for it, but mere imaginary value, somebody once thought would be cool to have, it is based upon.

(08 Nov '13, 05:52) CalonLan

I wouldn't really say, "I own anyone or anyone owns me." The only exception would be God, since I accepted salvation and my being a son of God.

To be possessive of people leads to people being unhappy. I think of the movie Fatal Attraction as my point.

(08 Nov '13, 09:45) Wade Casaldi

@Wade I highly doubt Mother Teresa meant owned. There is more than one definition of the word belong. I can't presume to speak for her & you're free to interpret a quote as you do poetry or a bible verse. My guess is she meant "to be part of something else" & you can decide for yourself what that 'something else' is or "to be part of" such as the human race or 'cosmos' or fill in the blank _ ?

(08 Nov '13, 10:02) ele

@Cal "As if all we are is in a sense wrong and our life's quest is to fix it." Oh dear, I certainly didn't mean to imply that. Why fix what ain't broken? We are all perfect, just as we are. I agree with most of your other comments. If you exclude spouse & children from the word family, I agree. For the most part, my friends are my real family. My parents are people I love because of who they are & not because we are related. As for your other question, I'll have to get back to you on that.

(08 Nov '13, 10:12) ele

@Wade ... or we came from stardust & we will return to stardust to once again become the bright shiny stars we are 'today' ... Have a great day! @Cal You have a fantastic fun filled weekend too - you deserve it - treat yourself to something nice.

(08 Nov '13, 10:22) ele

What you put out is what you get back.
Physical reality is actually a mirror: Your physical reality is just a reflection of what you most strongly believe to be true. And like a mirror, physical reality will not change unless you change first (change what you most strongly believe).

~ Bashar

(08 Nov '13, 20:20) Beach Baby

@Beach Baby "I'm looking at the man in the mirror. If you want to make the world a better place, then take a look at yourself and make a change." - Micheal Jackson

I think from that song he pretty much was in agreement with Bashar there.

(08 Nov '13, 21:47) Wade Casaldi
showing 2 of 10 show 8 more comments
Click here to create a free account

If you are seeing this message then the Inward Quest system has noticed that your web browser is behaving in an unusual way and is now blocking your active participation in this site for security reasons. As a result, among other things, you may find that you are unable to answer any questions or leave any comments. Unusual browser behavior is often caused by add-ons (ad-blocking, privacy etc) that interfere with the operation of our website. If you have installed these kinds of add-ons, we suggest you disable them for this website

Related Questions