What if then? Can I rationalize it as my soul wanting a tougher challenge?

I've always been optimistic given my situation. I have been listening to Abraham and Bashar for the past 5, 6 years. And sticking to its fundamentals especially when they suggests that life has no built in meaning. and about how we don't know much when we're at our physical level mind. Better to just take action on whatever that most excites you at the moment. Let the higher mind roll. Though I have been taking less and less action throughout the years -- most the things I've taken action on did not turn out to be a "good" outcome... I know it's not essential for everything to be "good" in order to learn but what worries me is nor could most my actions extend to a positive scenario. my sole purpose for the past 7, 8 years is to transform myself. Hence I came across first NLP, EFT, then these materials. there is a degree of grieve and regret because I haven't been able to achieve much, not even close. But at the same time I look past them and treat/look at them as lessons and experiences.

It's rational again to review on what I've done so I can avoid making the same mistakes. I must've done something "wrong"? My personality is analyzing paralyzing but at the same thing a bit ADD.

And now it just took another turn to the worse. Because I wasn't doing so well in the previous city I was in I had to pack up and return to my family until I can get back on my feet. Now I am 2 months in, wasn't able to find a job (I am a high school dropout), wasn't able to meet people (no drivers license, don't know anyone except for my family). notice how (these are all limited beliefs but at the same time real life situations) I talked with my family about my situation and needs perhaps they could introduce me to a few friends and keep an eye out for any possible opportunities. But they will not try to understand where I am coming from. Basically "we are not able to help"

So I am on my own. I am fine if things work out (at least for a bit for christs sake) but it really isn't. Being stuck at home and having no place to go is driving me insane not to mention all the things I need to do to kick off start.. "do the next available thing that you are capable of doing that gives you the most joy", for me? At this current situation would be taking a walk to a park. I am really lost. I cant give in now but at the same time no place that allow me to go or simply start over

Staying here like this will only drive me more depressed. I'd rather be in jail for 2 months at least there will be more drama and action involved. now I feel like I am just wasting my time having no experience on anything. Going back isn't really an option either since I cant support myself. I want an option #3 too. If there's just some way I can start and support myself... I cant see any and now I just occupy my day time with mindless YouTube and tv so I am tired enough to sleep at night. I let my past go already but what gives me headache is my future. the reason of this post is about my future.

I dont know how others would take this. I don't know how I am still taking this either. given my personality

And it's funny because I knew I probably couldn't start a new life so "ideally" before coming here but I couldn't imagine it to be so bad. I was really looking forward to enjoy some time spent together with my family talking and having meals but even that isn't possible. They all have their own "stuff" going on. And when together they are unwilling to communicate. I also have a younger sister who doesn't want to go out with me not because I am ugly or anything (I have to say here I am fairly good looking) but its because I'm almost 10 years older and shes a just turned 18 who finds Dane Cook funny. So all I've been talking about is my family. because they're the last thing I could turn to. Or so I thought. Good thing is there's still roof over my head.

Is this a hard knock to the head lesson to me I can only rely on myself? or is it what my soul wants to experience through in this lifetime... I really don't know anymore...

asked 13 Aug '11, 04:42

david%20w's gravatar image

david w

edited 13 Aug '11, 06:56

ursixx's gravatar image


One thing I've noticed with people who've studied these "Law of Attraction" type subjects for a while is that sometimes they manufacture these situations in their own life on purpose. I even find myself doing this to myself sometimes.

But I don't mean that in any kind of "negative" or "bad" way.

I've noticed it's a different thing going on than with someone who might, through ignorance of the Laws, have created a situation they think they didn't want.

You see, our broader, higher selves, as I'm sure you know by now, crave experience. Whether that experience is "bad" or "good" is irrelevant because those subjective labels are human-made and can change on a whim.

From the perspective of our broader, higher selves...all experience is good.

To explain this idea a little more clearly (hopefully), consider the analogy of learning to play a sport, say, someone learning to play tennis.

During the first few years of the game, they're going to keep making "mistakes" (as judged by better players) and they might at times feel they will never master the game.

tennis player

But there will eventually come a time, given enough interest, experience and knowledge, where playing the game becomes effortless and easy, and they start finding themselves getting bored with playing with their usual tennis buddies, who they now easily beat.

The player now wants more of a challenge.

So they might then start playing in a local or regional league and, again, at first, it's a challenge for them until they hone their skills further and eventually that level of playing the game gets too easy too.

Again, it becomes boring.

They want more of a challenge now - they want more experience. And so they might start taking part at national level...

And so, on and on it goes, playing the game at increasingly challenging levels...but it never feels like a challenge until they move to the new level because they acclimatize to each new "challenging" level.

Note carefully here that there are NO externally-imposed lessons to learn or things to fix. They play the game at more challenging levels because it is more FUN to play there

The increased sense of fun though is only perceived if you keep realigning with The Vortex - in other words, you view your life through the perspective of the new you that has expanded to play the game at the more challenging levels.

Once you do find that alignment, you'll enjoy that increased fun also.

So what does all this mean to you in your situation?

It means don't try to fix your problems or look for solutions until you have realigned with the Vortex. Until you have reached that state of alignment, if only briefly, you won't feel the fun of the situation - probably quite the opposite.

So the solution to every "problem" is always..

Vortex First, Any Way You Can, Then Everything Else

i.e. make that habitual Vortex alignment your only primary goal in each day.

And only when you are there, start examining your physical circumstances and situations. You'll then have a very different view of them (the fun view). And what you now perceive as a dead-end will just appear to you to be the equivalent of playing a more exciting game against a more challenging tennis player :)

Hope all that gives you something to think about.


answered 13 Aug '11, 10:21

Stingray's gravatar image


edited 13 Aug '11, 11:00

Very good, practical answer!

(13 Aug '11, 10:27) Maria 3

that is phenomenal Stingray. thank you. I read through your references and thanks for always taking the time to help all others here seeking help. I am sure doing this lets you dive right into the vortex :) I will do 15 mins of meditation to clear out my head in the morning, followed by seeing this as a fun challenges based world. I'll start with this, as long as it takes. oh and thats is a wacky photo :O

(14 Aug '11, 08:48) david w

You're welcome, David (and Maria). And, yes, that's quite perceptive of you to notice. Writing answers that are of value to others is one of my "Any Way You Can" Vortex alignment tricks :) Consistent, morning meditation is an excellent way to begin.

(14 Aug '11, 15:57) Stingray
showing 2 of 3 show 1 more comments

Hey David and welcome to IQ! To start with your title question
"What if the situation doesn't allow change?"
Only you can allow change the "situation" This situation is created by you.You give power/energy to it it is yours it is in your mind. You have listened to Abraham and Bashar. You might want to listen again. Not just the YouTube clips but the A-H books are great materials to listen to on your walks. and The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment by Eckhart Tolle. Is a great listen many times over!
You state many things in you question that you do have the power to change, no drivers license,no High School diploma.These are easily gotten and you seem like a smart person. You have time on you hands.Go for it! Attaining these 2 things would be an improvement also an opportunity to socialize with others.

Be truly grateful for your family, for their house,for yourself having to hands and feet that work.What would your life be without these things?

"When you are grateful, fear disappears and abundance appears.” ~Anthony Robbins

A quote from A-H that might help give you some perspective

The Eternal Laws of the Universe steadily hold the promise of expansion and joy. Understanding the Laws will reawaken within you the knowledge of your purpose and your own personal power as you remember how to access the power of the Universe that creates worlds.

If this time-space reality has within it the ability to inspire a desire within you, it is absolute that this time-space reality has the ability to yield you a full and satisfying manifestation of that same desire. It is Law.

--- Abraham
Excerpted from the book "Money and the Law of Attraction: Learning to Attract Health, Wealth and Happiness" # 24



answered 13 Aug '11, 07:36

ursixx's gravatar image


thanks. I know there are things in me that needed change. one of the reason I changed a living place was so that I will change as well. since the surroundings are different. did I change moving here? not how I expected but indeed yes. that could be a sign for me to move elsewhere with new gained knowledge and determination. it's only that the "situation", the financial doesnt allow me to go elsewhere at this point.

the power of Now is a great book. it taught me to stop the civil wars going on in my head. and just enjoy and do the now.

and yes you are dead on. what I need most is to social

(13 Aug '11, 08:07) david w

It's your limited belief doesn't allow you. Try volunteering.Give with expectation and you will receive undeniably.

(13 Aug '11, 09:10) ursixx

Any situation allows for change! There is literally no situation you could possibly be in that doesn't have room for change, even if is only your mental state that changes.

Many of the most successful people in the world did not finish school, so that is really no out for you. All you need is determination and ideas, and I am sure you are possessed of both.

But this is good news for you David, because you get to mold your new life however you like.

Write down all that you want to accomplish and how you want your ideal life to be. Write it all down, just like it really could happen, even if it seems impossible or far fetched. Describe your ideal day. Your ideal week. Your ideal year. A new car, and new apartment, job and so forth. Just writing it down alone, will help you to feel better and give you some direction. You will already be way ahead of most people, who just drift around reacting all the time to what happens to them, rather than making things happen for themselves or doing any planning.

Next write down all the steps it would take to reach each thing you wanted, even the little steps. Even the tiny ones! Check them off as you do them. You'll be moving forward towards what you want, you'll be putting things in motion, and you'll gain strength and confidence as you go along. You'll feel enthusiasm, and it will just keep getting easier. I promise. Before you know it, you'll see incredible progress, and the ball will be rolling. Don’t do anything that isn’t in line with your values and new goals. As you check off each of the steps, visualize doing the next one, and that will help too. It’s easier to do what you are already prepared for.

You really can live life on your own terms. I am not trying to lecture you, but to help, since you say that you don’t know how to start. It is totally possible to get from where you are to where you want to be. Just get started. It will be fun!


answered 13 Aug '11, 19:18

LeeAnn%201's gravatar image

LeeAnn 1

I guess I assumed the previous situation was a dead end. but if that wasnt and this here isnt. its legit to say its hope everywhere.

(14 Aug '11, 09:01) david w

"Good thing is there's still roof over my head."This is a good place to start. Be thankfull every day for everything you do have. Don't focus on what you don't have (except to set goals). Next, is there a public transportation system where you are? A bus, lightrail, train, trolly that goes around town? Is there a community college? Take the bus to the college and get your adult's deploma or GED. Sign up for financial aid and get a two year degree. They have counselors there to help you decide on a major and minor and set goals for your education. There are tests you can take (there is a question here on IQ with a link to one) that will tell you what kinds of carreers you might enjoy.

If there is not any public transportation, call the college and see if there are any carpools you could join. If there is not a college where you are, look for an online college. Meanwhile, get your driver's licence.

Meanwhile, use the EFT that you have learned, to eliminate the limiting beliefs and fears, etc... that you have or that come up as you go along.

While you are attending classes at the college, you will be meeting many people. So have faith, and expect that you will find a new friend in class. Decide what you are looking for in a friend. Don't expect anyone to be perfect, but you might as well help define what you want to attract. I mean things like, for me, I would want a friend who doesn't drink. When I moved into my apt. 14 years ago, I had made a list of things I was looking for and this apt. fit the list. So make your list.

Same thing with your carreer, figure out what you want to do, and start dreaming it up while you are going to college. Picture yourself doing what you want to do and being successful and happy at it. Start creating your future instead of worrying about it. Any time negative thoughts pop up that don't serve you, cast them out and replace them with positive thoughts. Like if, "I can't do this," pops into your head, say, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (Or something similar) If it is something that needs to be addressed, then address it and let it go.

It is not the responsibility of your family to make you happy, it is yours. It is your choice to be happy in whatsoever situation you find yourself. This is your chance to create the life of your dreams, so dream big and enjoy life.


answered 13 Aug '11, 13:49

Fairy%20Princess's gravatar image

Fairy Princess

edited 13 Aug '11, 13:54

thanks. that is all very practical advice. for now I cannot stay with my family for several reasons. I'll go back and make the best out of it and yes indeed I never really look at govt aids. I may or may not go back to school but securing a job comes first.

(14 Aug '11, 08:56) david w

Stop feeling sorry for yourself, and use will power, and self determination to get what you desire in life. You have to keep in mind that you are responsible for your success, and failure in life, so if plan A did not work for you, start your plan of action all over again, and go to plan B, and continue this exercise until you achieve your goal, and you have created the wealth you desire in life.

Good Luck, and use your personal power to create, and manifest your desire!


answered 13 Aug '11, 06:16

Inactive%20User's gravatar image

Inactive User ♦♦

thanks. I'll keep doing what needs to be done. harder and more reckless.

(13 Aug '11, 07:54) david w

The answer is in the question my friend...the first rule that i apply to my life is "i assume full responsibility for everything that happens in my life"...the most powerful law in the universe, the law of attraction, states that we are like magnets, we attract into our lives whatever we choose to think about, bring our attention to, and feel, whether we do this consciously or unconsciously.

So to answer your question...we can't change the situation but we can always change ourselves.


answered 13 Aug '11, 06:16

blubird%20two's gravatar image

blubird two

I do assume full responsibility. I understand the LoA and keep close monitor on how things make me feel. when I am in the moment nothing bothers me. whenever I go out and sit down in a nice place I cannot think of "problems". although what I intended was to sort out my mind in a nice calm place haha.. still. the fact remains and the situation is here. I've been changing throughout the years But this time it's a dead end.

(13 Aug '11, 07:52) david w

@david w Nice thing about dead ends is there is lots of room to turn around and drive out. ;) So turn around and go find the highway of you life and have fun on the journey

(13 Aug '11, 09:02) ursixx

thanks I'll keep that in mind~

(14 Aug '11, 08:56) david w

@david w:I would just like to encourage you to look at both end of the stick, and to say to yourself there is no dead end for me only challenges, that I will have to overcome, and overcome I will, because I know how to create, and manifest my desires. Read the Book “Positive Thinking” by Norman Vincent Peale, it will help you to clear up any misconception you may have, and it is a good read!

(16 Aug '11, 02:14) Inactive User ♦♦
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