I have read, over and over on this site, that we "create our own reality" and that we can "change our lives by thinking correctly". Then, you get hit by a drunk driver. Who would want that? Who would "ask" to be paralyzed for life? Can you blame a newborn for the holes in his heart lining that he was born with? This thinking is easy to describe, but does not explain when someone else destroys our spine.

For me, the people who are sick or injured, overweight or nervous, need our love and compassion, which asks of us to put ourselves in that person's place for a time. We are asked to develop this quality by all the Great Spiritual Leaders of the Past. What if Mother Theresa said to the poor and hungry, you are thinking incorrectly. So therefore, I will not help you; that would be enabling you. I would like to discuss this idea more closely.

Blessings, Jai

asked 11 Dec '09, 00:26

Jaianniah's gravatar image


edited 11 Dec '09, 01:43

Barry%20Allen's gravatar image

Barry Allen ♦♦

I have also struggled with this.

However, think about how many people you have heard stories about who had some kind of physical problem, who went on to become inspirational in some way, either by raising vast amounts of money to help others with the same problem, or by achieving great things in spite of their disability.

Can you think of a few of these people? Helen Keller comes to my mind immediately.

Some of these people would, if you could speak to them, would say to you: "If Jesus came to me and told me he could remove my disability tomorrow, I would tell him no. This disability is part of who I am. I am not afraid of it, and I have learned so much more about myself and my life than if I had not had this disability."

Could it be possible that some of these people chose their disability to experience life in a different way and learn from it?

Where is God's Perfection? The Story of Shaya

In Brooklyn, New York, Chush is a school that caters to learning disabled children. Some children remain in Chush for their entire school career, while others can be mainstreamed into conventional schools.

At a Chush fund-raising dinner, the father of a Chush child delivered a speech that would never be forgotten by all who attended.

After extolling the school and its dedicated staff, he cried out, "Where is the perfection in my son Shaya? Everything God does is done with perfection. But my child cannot understand things as other children do. My child cannot remember facts and figures as other children do. Where is God's perfection?"

The audience was shocked by the question, pained by the father's anguish, stilled by the piercing query.

" I believe," the father answered, "that when God brings a child like this into the world, the perfection that he seeks is in the way people react to this child."

He then told the following story about his son Shaya:

One afternoon Shaya and his father walked past a park where some boys Shaya knew were playing baseball.

Shaya asked, "Do you think they will let me play?"

Shaya's father knew that his son was not at all athletic and that most boys would not want him on their team. But Shaya's father understood that if his son was chosen to play it would give him a comfortable sense of belonging. Shaya's father approached one of the boys in the field and asked if Shaya could play. The boy looked around for guidance from his teammates. Getting none, he took matters into his own hands and said "We are losing by six runs and the game is in the eighth inning. I guess he can be on our team and we'll try to put him up to bat in the ninth inning."

Shaya's father was ecstatic as Shaya smiled broadly. Shaya was told to put on a glove and go out to play short center field.

In the bottom of the eighth inning, Shaya's team scored a few runs but was still behind by three. In the bottom of the ninth inning, Shaya's team scored again and now with two outs and the bases loaded with the potential winning run on base, Shaya was scheduled to be up. Would the team actually let Shaya bat at this juncture and give away their chance to win the game? Surprisingly, Shaya was given the bat.

Everyone knew that it was all but impossible because Shaya didn't even know how to hold the bat properly, let alone hit with it. However as Shaya stepped up to the plate, the pitcher moved a few steps to lob the ball in softly so Shaya should at least be able to make contact.

The first pitch came in and Shaya swung clumsily and missed. One of Shaya's teammates came up to Shaya and together the held the bat and faced the pitcher waiting for the next pitch. The pitcher again took a few steps forward to toss the ball softly toward Shaya. As the pitch came in, Shaya and his teammate swung at the bat and together they hit a slow ground ball to the pitcher.

The pitcher picked up the soft grounder and could easily have thrown the ball to the first baseman. Shaya would have been out and that would have ended the game. Instead, the pitcher took the ball and threw it on a high arc to right field, far beyond reach of the first baseman.

Everyone started yelling,"Shaya, run to first. Run to first." Never in his life had Shaya run to first. He scampered down the baseline wide-eyed and startled. By the time he reached first base, the right fielder had the ball. He could have thrown the ball to the second baseman who would tag out Shaya, who was still running. But the right fielder understood what the pitcher's intentions were, so he threw the ball high and far over the third baseman's head. Everyone yelled, "Run to second, run to second." Shaya ran towards second base as the runners ahead of him deliriously circled the bases towards home. As Shaya reached second base, the opposing short stop ran to him, turned him in the direction of third base and shouted, "Run to third." As Shaya rounded third, the boys from both teams ran behind him screaming, "Shaya run home."

Shaya ran home, stepped on home plate and all 18 boys lifted him on their shoulders and made him the hero, as he had just hit a "grand slam" and won the game for his team.

"That day," said the father softly with tears now rolling down his face, "those 18 boys reached their level of God's perfection.


answered 11 Dec '09, 00:45

Vesuvius's gravatar image


edited 19 Dec '09, 22:58

Thanks Vesuvius. I've heard this story before and it never fails to move me. Kids can really teach us adults at times :-)

(11 Dec '09, 02:52) Michaela

Thanks Vesuvius I hadn't heard the story before and it brought a waterfall of tears of joy down my face for both teams of boys cheering him on with the love of God and the joy of happiness that spread across his face within his heart. Thanks for the wonderful read of the kindness of others which is truly Gods work within us as we reach out and touch others during our daily lives.

(13 Feb '10, 12:52) flowingwater

As one of those who has stated in the past that we "create our own reality" etc, I would be interested to know where anyone on this site has stated that we should not show love and compassion to anyone?

I'm finding it difficult to see how the first and second statements in your question I cannot believe that people “Think” or “Want” to be sick or injured. Is not compassion part of the spiritual journey, too? are related. But obviously to you, they are related, so I guess there's a bit of a mismatch in my interpretation there. :)

Explaining why things happen to people seems a far cry from saying we should not help them if we encounter them. I spend (and have spent) a significant portion of my personal life helping people - mostly through inspiration and education regarding these reality creation ideas. Indeed, I used to work for a worldwide spiritual and mystical organization which had exactly that goal of re-empowering others by making this kind of knowledge available to humanity at large as freely as possible.

In some respects, this is just as much a valid activity as feeding the poor and hungry, because it gives people back the power to change their own lives without needing to rely on some perceived external authority...if they choose to apply the knowledge, that is.

I don't think anyone here is asking you to accept certain ideas or not. If you come across explanations that you disagree strongly with, then that is absolutely fine.

But maybe at some point in the future, it would be worth considering whether your clearly strong views regarding what you do and don't believe may be coloring your view of the knowledge that is sometimes presented on this website.

Regarding the first part of your question about whether people think or want to be sick and injured, I don't know many people (if any) who do want that consciously. But that doesn't mean they didn't attract those circumstances into their lives.

Helping others understand more clearly how that process of attraction happens is a worthwhile activity in my view.


answered 11 Dec '09, 01:17

Stingray's gravatar image


Thank you so much for your answer and clarifications. You have made me see what I needed to see for today...I am glad that I asked the question the way I did; perhaps others have the same misconceptions as I had or have. I decided that a discussion about this topic would be very enlightening...So far, it has.

Blessings, Jai

(11 Dec '09, 01:27) Jaianniah

I can't speak for jaianniah, but from my own point of view: Sometimes when people hear for the first time somebody say to them that they alone are responsible for where they are, the statement can appear to lack compassion. It sounds like, "It's your own damn fault, so dig your own self out."

(11 Dec '09, 02:37) Vesuvius

I,too,felt like that before but then comes the realization that if I created this or attracted it on a subconscious level then I also have the power to change it - how liberating!! I don't ever intend to come across with a lack of compassion but I know it's sometimes hard to pick up an intonation or feeling on a computer.

(11 Dec '09, 03:00) Michaela

I lived this "self responsibility" phenomenon. I spent much of my early life wanting to and trying to commit suicide. The reason "why?" is not important(too personal). I was stuck & couldn't see how my circumstance could change. I felt that God had given up on me. Then a miraculous event happened (looking back there were many), & I was guided to a book on how the "within" created the "without". For the first time I could give myself hope & I did. I self created a vision of "posibility" & held on till all the circumstances matched by vision. I'm alive because of this philosophy.

(11 Dec '09, 06:06) The Traveller

@Vesuvius: And yet tell those same people that they created it all after something wonderful has happened and they will be joyous about their own ability and power. :) Of course, they probably won't be interested in understanding how reality creation works during those happy times. ;)

(11 Dec '09, 07:02) Stingray

@Stingray - "In some respects, this is just as much a valid activity as feeding the poor and hungry..." To me, this is at the very least equal to feeding people. Teach us to fish! It's how countless people, like me, like our @Traveller here, are still... here. :) @Traveller, SO glad you decided to stay. Have I ever mentioned that to you? ;)

I do see how it can be misunderstood, though. My heart aches when I forget who and what I really am, and I want comfort. I need reminding. :)

(24 Mar '13, 16:26) Grace
showing 2 of 6 show 4 more comments

Consciously people do not "think" or "want" to be sick or injured. However, we are all made up of energy and unknowingly some people are vibrating on a frequency that does not resonate with the frequency of wellbeing. We do come here to experience contrast and diversity so maybe in that illness or injury there is a lesson that we can learn from or as Vesuvius said become a source of inspiration for others.

When we are in a place of optimal health or wellbeing we are in a much better position to help others or add to humanity as a whole. Our quest should always be to reach our own state of wellbeing and the love and compassion for others will follow naturally from there. For me personally, on this spiritual journey, empathy and compassion for others is a natural progression; as our hearts begin to open to the Source from which we came, they also open to the Oneness of all - I get that vibe from most people using this site, so please don't think that we are in anyway trying to make light of your injury or suggesting that you consciously asked for it. A year or two ago I would probably have agreed with you but I am now convinced that the root of every illness is first and foremost mental.

I hope and pray your pain eases soon. Be well.


answered 11 Dec '09, 01:29

Michaela's gravatar image


There seem to be some people who do like being sick on some level and enjoy the sympathy and attention, even if it is an unconscious thing with them. Some that dwell on and study about illnesses until their body creates the conditions they are constantly focusing on....the law of attraction. Probably most of us know someone like that.

But a child born with a defective heart did not ask for or deserve the disability. Someone hit by a drunk driver is the victim of the drunk driver's free will---the driver chose to get drunk and still drive his or her car, endangering others. Or a person gets sick from chemicals at work. He or she is a victim; it was not something they were seeking. Do you see what I am saying?

For most people an illness or injury was not asked for. It's not for us to say how a person came to their position; though, not for us to judge. We are morally obligated to try to help if they will accept it. These are just my opinions, of course!

This was a good question though and I will be interested to see what others have to say.


answered 20 Dec '09, 00:13

LeeAnn%201's gravatar image

LeeAnn 1

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