This question relates to: What role does chance and being-in-the-wrong-place-at-the-wrong-time play into the LOA?

This is really interesting and confusing. Where I understand and believe that we do attract every experience - good or bad - I get confused because I believe we grow spiritually only through experiences, our own and others.

That's where I get confused - when you suffer - heartbreak after heartbreak is it because you deeply want a soulmate (LOA) therefore in order for the universe to provide this to you, you had to experience suffering in order to recognise a soulmate or prepare you for your soulmate.

Yet if we believe we have a devine self there would be no suffering but to get to the devine state - we have to first experience suffering and learn about LOA.

Do we attract our own death or do we have a time to die? - for instance before we were born we choose when and how we die, or when we have done what we came here to do?

If that were the case then it would come back to LOA for our deaths.

asked 30 Jan '12, 10:58

alsorts's gravatar image


converted to question 30 Jan '12, 11:34

Barry%20Allen's gravatar image

Barry Allen ♦♦

@alsorts, I've converted your "answer" into a new question otherwise others may not see it

(30 Jan '12, 11:39) Barry Allen ♦♦

thank you for your answers blu, stingray and lapis. Funny because I asked the question yesterday and today happened across a webinar sent to my email that I wasn't interested in viewing but did anyway and it touched on this subject. So it is starting to make sense to me, such as suffering is one's reaction and I can choose to react differently - mind state. For instance accept whats happened then say! and move on.

(31 Jan '12, 10:45) alsorts
showing 1 of 2 show 1 more comments

Abraham say that all death is suicide...meaning that you vibrationally choose when you want to die.

Of course, not everyone (yet) is aware of what they are vibrationally choosing because many deem their emotions (the vibrational feedback mechanism) are not important to them. That means that deaths to them can seem to be random and unexpected - though none ever are.

There's more information on these ideas in: Does the way in which a person dies reflect their level of "spiritual attainment' ?

Regarding the other point in the body of your question, as LapisLazuli says, you never need to suffer. It's entirely your choice if that's the way you want to live your life.

The keynote principle underlying our physical realities is that of expansion. We are always becoming more whether we want to or not. So standing still in life is never an option because the standing-still place is effectively going backwards if everything else is moving forwards.

So one could argue that the amount of suffering you choose to endure is related to the amount by which you wish to try to "stand still" in a world of eternal motion.

So there's really two approaches to life.

One approach is to stand still, make yourself suffer a lot and then eventually go with it (because you really have no choice but to "go with it" in the long run). The other approach is to just keep gently re-aligning with the new expanded place that your life naturally brings you into.

Which approach is right for you?

Well, it depends on how much drama you like in your life :)

There's more information regarding these different approaches to living in: How to increase density of desire for some thing to manifest it easily ?


answered 31 Jan '12, 07:33

Stingray's gravatar image


edited 31 Jan '12, 07:35

@Stingray - I remembered you mentioned you went to visit Abraham at least two or three times. Would you mind sharing with us which particular and exact workshops/cruises were those ?

(01 Feb '12, 01:59) kakaboo

@kakaboo - I've been to see them live 3 times. The only time I've been in the "hot seat" to ask questions was Syracuse, NY, 29 Sep 2004

(01 Feb '12, 07:02) Stingray

@Stingray - originally I thought you wouldn't answer this question because you might be afraid of others hearing your voice..(considering that you took such lengths to mask your voice in the focus blocks video)..haha (face is not possible cause dont think AH did video recording at that time yet) so thanks!

(01 Feb '12, 09:20) kakaboo

@kakaboo - The seminars in those days were virtually a full day in length and the weekly CDs were only an hour-long selection of them. My questions were not selected to be on the weekly CD so you still won't be hearing my voice :)

(01 Feb '12, 09:52) Stingray

oh.. no wonder.. that breaks my heart :-D

(01 Feb '12, 20:41) kakaboo

@Stingray - I was just thinking about this the other day and this is one thing I don't get about the Law of Attraction - logically speaking wouldn't I be able to attract this into my life? since I am not asserting you in any way as you have already done the thing..

(03 Feb '12, 11:45) kakaboo

@kakaboo - I'm guessing you are talking about my session with Abraham, rather than the question of death :) Sure, you could attract it but, to do so, you would have to align with the belief that it was possible to do so regardless of what your rational, logical mind says about whether it is possible or not.

(03 Feb '12, 12:00) Stingray

@kakaboo - It's interesting how our rational minds work by filling in "gaps" that are not really there and thereby setting us up to believe in truths that are not really true. I only said my questions were not selected to be on the weekly CD. Yet across the room from me, there is a bookshelf with an Abraham-Hicks CD on it...and I'm on that CD ;)

(03 Feb '12, 12:10) Stingray

@Stingray - haha you're right, you were on the CD, I already heard it (although you dont sound like a person from a Muslim background[just remember you mentioned about this a few times on this site]).. so after that I was actually wondering would I actually be able to find a DVD version of it even though they(AH) didnt take video recordings at that time and so I asked the question to see what might your response be :)

(03 Feb '12, 12:14) kakaboo

@kakaboo - Well done, if you tracked it down. I'm not sure how you expect people from Muslim backgrounds to sound :)

(03 Feb '12, 12:25) Stingray

Maybe it is just that I am too used to the Malay accent in my country (Singapore) that I sometimes forget people who are not Malays might have a Muslim background too ..haha

(03 Feb '12, 12:40) kakaboo
showing 2 of 11 show 9 more comments

But see... you never have to suffer. The way you feel in any given moment is completely up to you. A not-so-ideal situation can happen to you, but you can choose to be happy regardless. That is how you break the cycle of heartbreak after heartbreak. "Circumstances don't matter, only state of being matters." -Bashar


answered 30 Jan '12, 11:18

LapisLazuli's gravatar image


yeah I get that, I guess i'm thinking that LOA is maybe not just materialistic stuff but perhaps that spiritual growth stuff. I mean I guess most people want to use LOA to get more money, have big house or car, find mr or mrs right, but the LOA must be also perhaps about growth and that must have to include some struggles and suffering. When we get to a higher state we understand we don't need to struggle.

(30 Jan '12, 11:36) alsorts

lapislazuli, there is such a thing as unmerited suffering. as the atoms within you are affected by your choices, so are we by family, organizational, planetary, solar, universal and cosmic karma

(01 Feb '12, 06:54) fred

I'm not sure what you mean... I know there are situations that are hard to overcome, but every situation I've ever been in, if I put my mind to it, I could have felt great regardless. I don't believe its always easy but I believe its possible to feel anything in any circumstance, which would make suffering, ultimately, a choice.

(01 Feb '12, 10:37) LapisLazuli
showing 2 of 3 show 1 more comments

it is not chance, but
the way you lived
both now and before
you set your own stage

do i still look outside
to get recognition
and hasten tissue decomposition
or can my mind stop that


answered 31 Jan '12, 21:24

fred's gravatar image


you have free will and are responsible of it if you want to do something that will kill you then it might kill you. if you decide to die you will die. its all about choice. yes when you decide it is the time. but nature can play a role in that also. there is many factor affecting your choice. experience and enjoy.


answered 31 Jan '12, 23:24

white%20tiger's gravatar image

white tiger

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