I'm thinking about both physical and emotional pain. I am around people living with both kinds, in different areas of my life, and I see the two as basically the same thing. People seem to react in much the same way to both.

There are physical pains that I have seen people really struggle with, that to me seem a minor irritation, and vise versa. It's the same with emotional pain. A hurt caused by a harsh word means a momentary frown to some, a heavy heart and tears to others.

But why? We are all humans (presumably).... ;) We are all hardwired basically the same. How can it be that there is such a disparity in how we experience the same things? I want to understand, because I want to put myself on the happiest, healthiest path I can, and to be of assistance to others around me that I care about as well.

What I see is people struggling for validation, and that seems to have a lot to do with how well they live with or overcome pain. If a person feels their pain is misunderstood, dismissed, or not recognised as significant, they can sometimes seem to feel worse; sad, hopeless, or they may argue for the limitation, in order to feel that they matter, that they are significant, themselves.

Everyone wants to feel that they matter, yet I know better than to focus on the pain, and thereby perpetuate it. Maybe that's what it comes down to, for myself and for others - how to validate but not perpetuate! LOL! :)

I hope this is making sense. I'm struggling to find the right words. I want to understand how it is that we're all the same, but so different, so that I can honor it all, and see clearly.


asked 18 Apr '13, 00:05

Grace's gravatar image


edited 18 Apr '13, 00:08

Perception, as stated below, yes, but also some people are simply Different and do experience more intently. I have worked with special needs children/ individuals in the past and have one of my own. I can tell you that not everybody is hardwired the same way... there are some that can be super sensitive to feelings in general.

(18 Apr '13, 18:17) Dragonflybreeze
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The 9D Pleiadians have an insightful saying to do with pain that they like to repeat often...

Pain is Perception

Here's a link to an article with that quote.

So to answer your question...

Why do we all experience pain so differently?

...it must be because all our points of perception are so uniquely different. And intentionally so, because we are all unique aspects of the "Universal Consciousness" that is expressing itself in different forms in order to experience itself.

Our physical vehicles ("bodies") may all be hard-wired the same but like with the flow of road traffic, it's not about the cars but about the drivers :)

All pain derives from the perceived division between physical and non-physical self...it ultimately comes about from a thought that has been focused upon (even to the point of physical bodily manifestation of it) that the non-physical self refuses to resonate with, and we feel that habitual separation (or resistance) as "pain".

And there are an infinite numbers of ways for that separation to manifest.

It works similarly to the idea that you can be lost (geographically) in many different places, but you can only be in the place you really want to be in one way :)

I remember once listening to an interview with the songwriter of a major rock band explaining why his songs were so miserable. He explained that there were so many different ways to express unhappiness but really only one way to express happiness...it just gave him more material to write about if he wrote miserable songs :)


answered 18 Apr '13, 06:15

Stingray's gravatar image


edited 18 Apr '13, 06:22


@Stingray Morrissey by any chance?

(18 Apr '13, 06:46) Catherine

@Catherine - Long time ago, can't remember who it was unfortunately. I don't really follow Morrissey but he certainly has come across (in the past, at least) as a true master of the miserable songwriting art-form :) ...though, having said that, a friend of mine from long ago once wrote a song which Morrissey used, and he wasn't a miserable person at all...don't know if the song was :)

(18 Apr '13, 07:03) Stingray

thanks for the 9D pleiadians link :)

(18 Apr '13, 12:18) ru bis

@Stingray - Your definition of pain - I just love it. Have you shared that here before? I'm sure you have, I just couldn't see it until now. That is bouncing off all kinds of hidden and scary things inside me right now; I immediately related it to the physical pain I have had for the last handful of years.

Your link to the article where the quote "Pain is Perception" came from goes on to talk about how to accept where I am (always a little fuzzy for me)...

(18 Apr '13, 17:40) Grace

... by accepting that I co-created it, and ask what I can learn from what I have created and - most importantly - to accept that answer. As soon as I read that, I thought: "All this pain does allow me to stay within, which is exactly where I have always wanted to be." I have always judged that in me as "bad", and tried to remedy it. There's a lot more surfacing, but I won't bore you with it. Thank you so much....

(18 Apr '13, 17:40) Grace

.... As far as helping to understanding other people's pain, I guess it goes back to the fact that nobody does anything for no reason. There is always a payoff of some kind, for any behavior; that I do know. I don't see how I can be helpful to anyone who is getting what they need from the experience. Seems like this is one of those reasons why I need to but-out when someone is suffering, huh? :) ....

(18 Apr '13, 17:40) Grace

I don't think we like to admit it - that we co-create our pain. We want to feel it is happening to us, not through us, so that.... What? So that we can pity ourselves? But I wonder why? What do we get from feeling sorry for ourselves? ..... Just thinking out loud.... I don't understand that, and I know I've done it myself. Maybe I should post the question.

Thanks again, @Stingray, you have really helped. It is sooooo good to see you. :)

(18 Apr '13, 17:41) Grace

@Catherine - You made me think of Damien Rice. ;) Sweet sadness.

(18 Apr '13, 17:43) Grace

@ Stingray - I understand your point about the different points of perception. But I have noticed with myself, the way I experience pain over the years has changed with more life experience and through intentionally not willing to feel bad sometimes. How does someone's willingness and ability to change oneself fit in with your answer? Are we saying we can change within certain confines?

(19 Apr '13, 13:01) Pink Diamond

@Grace I listened to "O" non stop one Summer - absolute melancholy favourite went something like "cold, cold water surrounds me now and I can't let go of your hand ... Lord, can you hear me now ... I am lost".

(19 Apr '13, 13:17) Catherine
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I believe it has to be connected to expectancy provided by past experiences.

Something happens to my Jai and right away it must be serious, life or death situation.

For me no matter what happens to me I feel and know that it is a passing thing and I don't need some doctor or hospital!

Unfortunately this makes me worry about her every time she gets sick or hurt. This also makes her worry about me every time I get hurt or sick.


answered 18 Apr '13, 00:21

Wade%20Casaldi's gravatar image

Wade Casaldi

Worry is natural and sometimes necessary... If we never worried, we would be not much different from a heartless computer... only performing mundane, repetitive, unintellectual actions. It can of course weigh the variables in the situation and see if the worry is warranted or unwarranted. For example, if you are feeling worried about an individual getting knocked over on a surf board by a wave, but they are nowhere near the ocean... the fear would of course be unwarranted, under teh circumstance

(18 Apr '13, 18:24) Dragonflybreeze

@Wade - I see what you mean. I have a friend in the medical field who always thinks of the worst possible outcomes, because of being so accustomed to seeing the physical worst. That brings me back to LOA; that I will get what I think about. @Stingray's description above of pain being the manifestation of something your higher self refuses to resonate with - do you see that in what you and @Jai experience? I want to dig into this insight for my own self, it is ringing bells inside.

(19 Apr '13, 22:23) Grace

@Grace When I have a pain or physical problem I see it as a hindrance. It is some junk I have to deal with for now but all things change. Maybe I have to wait it out or beat it but I don't have time to worry about it. The worst that could happen is I could die, I'm ready for that, I'm saved so why worry?

(19 Apr '13, 23:04) Wade Casaldi

@Wade - That sounds like you are putting up very little resistance! :) It would follow, then, that you experience very little pain? Hmmmm. Thanks! I think you are a good, living example of what I aiming for. :D

(20 Apr '13, 00:35) Grace

... I'm thinking both @Jai and I would do well to quit caring so much about how our pains and illnesses affect the people and things we care about! Your description makes it sound like flicking away a pestering fly. Bah! Nothing but a temporary annoyance. I love it! Tell @Jai, would you, for me? and give her a big, wet kiss from me, and tell her I hope she's feeling much better. Migraine? What migraine? :) Bah!

(20 Apr '13, 00:36) Grace
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"My heart is in anguish within me; the terrors of death have fallen on me. Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me. I said, “Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest. I would flee far away and stay in the desert; I would hurry to my place of shelter, far from the tempest and storm.” Psalms 55:4-8

This is a psalm from David, servant of God. He used to be persecuted so much because other's wanted the throne of Israel, and even his own son tried to kill him for it. I like reading psalms because, besides the fact that it speaks righteously of God, the Ancients remind me that pain has always existed and God holds the head up of the afflicted. When I'm feeling depressed, I like to read of David's pain, I feel like he relates except his pain was monumentally bigger than mine and He endured because as he says "Cast your cares on the Lord and He will sustain you; He will never let the righteous be shaken. But You, God, will bring down the wicked into the pit of decay; the bloodthirsty and deceitful will not live out half their days. But as for me, I trust in You." Psalms 55:22-23 Take advantage of God's Loving Mercy while you still can bro.


answered 19 Apr '13, 23:11

Dodova1990's gravatar image


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