To make a long story short, I used to travel a lot for my job and it finally ended when I left one position for another. Until recently, I was traveling very infrequently and I work out of my house with this new position. Being at home is great because I have time to meditate, exercise in the morning before work and cook healthy meals for myself and my family while being efficient at my job. I also make time during the day for self contemplation; and taking this time has allowed me to become more self-assured. I am able to establish a routine for the first time in my adult life and I love it!

Now, there has been a financial setback with the company I work for, and I'm back on the road travelling weekly while my employer finds more contracts. In fact I'm writing this from my hotel room. Frankly, I really feel like I've moved beyond doing this; but I don't know why I put myself back in this position. I have such a great routine when I'm at home and I really have put the time I have at home to good use for myself, my employer and my family.

I truly feel that I can do more with my life when I'm not in such a disruptive situation, and unfortunately, I'm really dwelling on the negative which I know is not something I should do. I keep looking for the lesson in all of this but just end up with my stomach in knots. In a nutshell, this situation has really been a blow to my confidence.

So the question is this: How does one focus on the "want" when in a situation that makes one feel so off kilter? I’ve used Stingray's focus blocks and I love how they work in certain situations. I tried a focus block with this situation and it didn't ring true, so I used journaling to express my wants and expectations. It's a comfort when I re-read what I've wrote, but when most of my time is spent traveling or preparing to travel (i.e. doing that which is not are calling) I have a hard time maintaining a high vibrational state.

Bonus question: I really feel like I have made progress spiritually over the last year but why did I put myself back in this situation?

asked 16 Feb '11, 20:43

Salvagetherapy's gravatar image



I think the thing that often "goes wrong" for people who understand they create their own reality is that they tend to blame themselves whenever their current reality is not how they want it to be.

We tend to beat ourselves up for anything in our lives that doesn't measure up to what we expected. We tend to castigate and punish ourselves because we feel we should be doing better. It's understandable because you understand you are doing it to yourself and now you are furious with yourself for doing it to yourself :)

So the first step in getting back on your vibrational feet again is...acceptance of your current situation.

Acceptance doesn't mean you have to like where you are, or be prepared to be where you currently are forever more. Acceptance just means you are going to let go of any blame you attach to yourself for the situation you are in.

You are where you are right now and that's that. It doesn't matter how you got here, because how you got here has no power over you right now. Only NOW matters.

Genuine acceptance frees you up to be open to something changing even if it is not physically visible yet. Denial, frustration, anger etc. just hold you firmly where you are.

I would say the next thing to do would be to not try to change your situation when you are particularly feeling bad or depressed about it. Give yourself a break and just give up trying so hard for a while.

Yes, you could try tackling your current circumstances "head-on" using Focus Blocks or similar methods but if you are feeling that bad and these methods are still fairly new to you then you may be better off just waiting until the vibrational tide turns and you are feeling better again. See How do you raise your vibrational level when you’re ill? for more information on the idea of timing your vibrational work.

Now the next stage in my view is the crucial one for getting yourself back on your feet again...(and this idea comes from Bashar)...

Whenever you are attempting to deliberately change your circumstances, there will be a test.

If you "pass" the test, your circumstances will change. If you "fail" the test, you are probably still going to carry on manifesting where you are.

Now I don't mean test here in the sense of someone else or something else testing your worthiness or willingness to change - there is nothing and no-one "out there" judging you or punishing you. It is an impersonal, non-judgemental vibrational test.

To explain this idea of the test, let's look at an example.

alt text

Let's say I want to change my relationship with someone. And let's say that currently we always fight and argue every time we meet. So I now do some vibrational work using my favorite method and then, sooner or later, the test will come.

What will happen with the test is that the person who I have a bad relationship with will still behave in the same way with me that they always have in some may be to a much lesser extent than "normal" because of the vibrational work that has been done but it will still be enough to generate the possibility of the old vibrational reaction within you resurfacing.

Now if you have genuinely shifted your vibration into a better place, you will "pass" the will remain unaffected by the remnants of old behavior they offer you and the endlessly re-creating vibrational loop you were previously trapped in is now broken - and things will probably change dramatically.

On the other hand, you may not be stable enough within your current new vibration to deal with the "test" so it throws you back to where you previously were and now you are back embroiled in self-blame for where you now are again.

The "test" is what I was alluding to when I made the comment in this answer that "If you truly expected someone to behave in a certain way, you wouldn't even notice if they didn't!"

The "test" naturally comes about whenever you attempt a change in a habitual vibration and the way I always advocate dealing with it is to only do vibrational work for the fun of it and not to try to make things happen. That way you won't notice that external circumstances haven't changed yet, which causes your "old" vibration to re-dominate, and thereby make you "fail" the test.

Again I must repeat that this "test" that occurs is not imposed by some mysterious external force or entity.

You could instead think of it as the boundary that surrounds the habitual vibration you are currently in - once you break out of that boundary, you are free to move vibrationally and your physical circumstances will change rapidly to match your improved vibration.

Hope that gives you some food for thought.


This excellent video from Bashar deals with the ideas mentioned in this answer:


answered 17 Feb '11, 00:44

Stingray's gravatar image


edited 14 May '13, 12:41

I can relate to this answer very well, Stingray. One question though - you said there's a test whenever we deliberately try to change our circumstances. Does it mean that when we do vibrational work just for the fun of it, a "test" situation won't arise?

(17 Feb '11, 03:03) Pat W

@PatW - if you are doing the work for the fun of it, you won't notice or care whether there is a test or not so, from your experience, there is no test. In this case, just having fun becomes your ultimate aim, rather than trying to change physical reality, and the paradox here is then that in genuinely not trying to change physical reality, physical reality becomes extremely responsive.

(17 Feb '11, 07:05) Stingray

Just for completeness of explanation, I should add that Bashar's methods tend to be more action-oriented than Abraham's and Bashar's recommendation for dealing with the test is, when faced with it, to act as if you are in the new vibration already rather than allow yourself to get caught up in the old one again. Personally, I find Abraham's approach of simply ignoring physical reality completely (and only using it as a desire-generator) more elegant and pleasing. But it's a matter of personal preference ultimately, I think

(17 Feb '11, 07:22) Stingray

OK, I get it now. :D Well, I haven't explored Bashar at all although it's mentioned quite a bit on this site. I think the advice on doing vibrational work for the fun of it is quite do-able, so I'll continue doing that. Thanks!

(17 Feb '11, 09:40) Pat W

Very interesting. And I can relate. I thought it was impossible to do vibrational work just for 'fun' but after some practice a lightening up :) I only do it when I feel like it and I do it mostly to enter the vortex. Thanks!

(17 Feb '11, 17:59) Chris 2

Thanks all for the answers and comments; they've been very helpful! My response was too long so I answered my own question below.

(18 Feb '11, 14:35) Salvagetherapy

hi five to @Stingray ...for sharing your deep thoughtful Rocks :)

(19 Jun '11, 18:47) streetsanto

@Stingray - I hadn't thought about this post in a long time when I "accidentally" came across it today. A few weeks ago, (right about the time you mentioned this might happen in your 30 Day Vortex Challenge) I received a letter regarding a situation that I want to change. It was so deliberately bleak, I had to laugh. Something like "Even though we believe in you, the chances really are extremely slim that you will ever succeed. But don't let that discourage you." Lol really??? ...

(04 Nov '14, 18:12) Grace

...I remembered the principle you wrote about here, if not the actual post, and set the letter aside as good news that I am shaking things up and off. Thanks again. These answers have very long-term benefits. :)

(04 Nov '14, 18:12) Grace
showing 2 of 9 show 7 more comments

Ok, I hear what you are saying and kind of get your feeling of frustration.The main thing is that you have already identified what it is you want.....more time at home, time for your own spiritual advencement and less stress. Now what you are looking for is more expansion on why you feel you have taken a step backwards.

This is an exercise that I have used in the past to get more clarity on my concious or unconcious choices. I would take a piece of paper and perhaps in your case write the words "Why do I find myself in this position". Write this question over and over again...quickly.... (accept that you may write it 100 times if not more) UNTIL suddenly something else starts to come through. Follow the thread through without question and you will eventually get one of those"Oh my God" moments when you uncover something deep within you that is causing the tempory block

Good luck


answered 16 Feb '11, 23:59

Susan%201's gravatar image

Susan 1


Interesting approach! thank you susan

(17 Feb '11, 13:34) daniele

Thanks for mentioning this because the very next paragraph that I quoted in Stingray’s response to my questions mentions a technique just like this. “The moment you become aware that you’re feeling a little shake or off base, ask yourself: What’s been bothering me? And keep at it until an answer comes out. It will.

(18 Feb '11, 14:28) Salvagetherapy

What I find is that when I have a situation that I am not happy with then I allow myself to feel bad and when I am having an experience that I like then I allow myself to feel good. But I now realize that I can feel good no matter what the situation is. This is a choice that we can make regardless of the circumstances and trust me I have been tested big time in this respect so I can relate. I am now making "feeling good" my daily choice. Sometimes I slip back into the feel bad thing but I dont allow myself to stay there.

To answer you directly I feel that if you absolutely cannot change the situation that you are in presently then don't punish yourself by feeling bad. Allow yourself to feel good. Think about your family and things you like doing at home when you are in your hotel room. If that does not help think about anything that will make you feel good. Take your favorite movie or books with you on your trips. Find something that will make you feel good until you can change the present situation.


answered 17 Feb '11, 22:51

Drham's gravatar image


To me, this is what it’s all about. If you learn to consciously switch from resonating at a lower frequency to a higher one you ultimately become a deliberate creator. It’s a lifelong endeavor but the payoff is a very fulfilling and rewarding life!

(18 Feb '11, 14:43) Salvagetherapy

I was reading on the plane and I came across a really good explanation of why I'm having trouble moving into a higher vibrational state and being at peace with myself regardless of the circumstances. I was reading through Excuse me, your life is waiting by Lynn Grabhorn and I came across this "We already know the only thing that messes up our experience is resistance to our own higher energies, but sometimes being in those energies can cause things to happen that are not always too pleasant. Pulling in higher frequency is sort of like aiming a hose at a muddy old sidewalk. The heavy stream of water squirts away the mud to reveal some nasty cracks in the walkway...Those cracks are our resistance, our inner critic, our old ideas of social rights and wrongs, or old low-frequency security blankets being laid bare by the higher frequencies. The greater our wanting is, the greater the energy we're pulling in, just as the more forceful the stream of water is, the more cracks will be uncovered. All of a sudden we feel rocky, vulnerable, exposed to the elements without protection as what has been hidden away for so long surfaces to struggle for survival. Ultimately what has been hidden will die away, but not without a fight. This can make for some rather bumpy emotional rides."

This paragraph really resonates with me and in my mind parallels the test that Basher speaks about in Stingray's response.

Also the one thing I've discovered since I've been traveling these last couple of weeks is that I really feel like I make progress in understanding myself since I'm alone and can think without interruption.


answered 18 Feb '11, 14:37

Salvagetherapy's gravatar image


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