Here on our beautiful planet earth we human beings love to love but our love is mostly conditional. Why is that? What prevents us from loving compleatley and unconditionaly? Is it the matter we are clothed in? Is it the selfsatisfying ego? What would you say?

asked 10 Sep '11, 07:25

Paulina%201's gravatar image

Paulina 1

I’m not so sure that what you say is a fundamental truth. I guess it depends on what you focus upon in life and how you view reality. If you watch any and all mainstream news channels and you read most newspapers often then yes, that will be your impression of people within this reality.

However, there are at least an equal number of people doing positive things from the perspective of unconditional love; you just need to turn off your television and don’t read any and all mainstream news to see the evidence of their efforts ;)

Here’s an alternative news source Good News Network that you can choose to spend time reading, if news
is what you want...

If you look into to the idea of ying and yang you’ll see that positive and negative is contained within all things. As such, it’s always up to each individual to choose and decide what to focus upon, believe to be true and thus experience.

Getting to the root of the question, I’d say it’s because in this particular reality, for whatever reasons, many have forgotten who they really are at their source. Many parents and much of society believe in the idea of separation because that’s what they’ve been taught and now choose to blindly believe is the truth.

The idea of separation, by definition, means division and where there’s division there’s the potential for conflict. So that’s how society in general chooses to live and hence war and conflict becomes the natural order of life and of living; be it in the family home, at work, as a nation or in the international community as a whole. The negative ego is merely a by-product of our misunderstanding.

We’re born into a society that lives by this idea and our blind belief perpetuates and sustains it. You do this for me and I’ll love you. I’ll do this for you if you’ll love me. And we call this a loving relationship, but really it’s just a mutual exchange of needs that has very little to do with love. We crave for love, but we’ve made love conditional in terms of making love an idea that’s mutually beneficial to those indulging (taking part) in the idea of conditional love.

However, for unknown or perhaps un-remembered reasons, there comes a time in some people’s lives when they begin to question other people’s beliefs and understanding concerning life and living. They start becoming aware of the action of their mind and then they see the cyclic nature of their life and the perpetual conflict and never-ending wars everywhere. They begin to see the utter meaninglessness and pointlessness of it all and then they realize, oh, surely there must be more to life than this :)

And once they begin their inquiry into the true nature of reality, they begin to see and understand the idea of unity and the oneness of consciousness. And seeing that oneness is fundamental, the idea of separation and division as an absolute begin to fall by the wayside; while the idea of remembering who they are and what life is takes precedence in their lives.

Realizing that any label we apply, such as consciousness, unconditional love or source energy etcetera to What Is is not What Is, we understand that words are merely labels or signposts which are pointers towards What Is; but the label is not the thing itself. The thing itself will always remain nameless and thus is beyond all words and all labels.

Can you see how even the idea of unconditional love remains unconditional in terms of being beyond any label? Regardless, at this stage in our evolution we have to use words. So unconditional love is what we’re made of; it’s who we really are. All we have to do is know that and be that Peace


answered 11 Sep '11, 07:28

Eddie's gravatar image


Eddie Your answer is the one I think I resonate most with. It is beautiful and true and if one looks below the surface one finds we are all love. You and Jai both deserve merrit and I wish I could give both the green tick. Thanks for the Good News Network.

(11 Sep '11, 08:36) Paulina 1

possibly cultural norms;
being brought up in/with competition that stresses individual success,
with fears that others want and will take what we have,
and that this life and our entitlements to consumption is all that there is,
how does one reconcile turning the other cheek if you'll get run over?


answered 11 Sep '11, 00:17

fred's gravatar image


Good answer Fred. It is true in the world of today people feel that showing love is a weaknes.

(11 Sep '11, 08:12) Paulina 1

Human beings are capable of unconditional love, and sometimes do great things because they have loved unconditionally. Richard "Rick" Rescorla gave his life organizing the evacuation of his building on 9/11- saving about 2,000 lives- and yet he perished. You can read about him here.

I think, on the eve of the tenth anniversary of 9/11, it would be good to remember that human beings can and do love unconditionally. It would be a dishonor to every person who did something to help on 9/11- the firemen, the policemen, the ordinary people-even the press- to say that human beings only love conditionally.

I do not believe that I love my fiance "conditionally". I would take a bullet for him without a thought if called upon to do so. His needs have become mine. I love him as unconditionally as I am capable to the depths of me soul.

I am a Christian, and everyone on IQ knows that I am, and I try to live the way that Jesus would have me live. Am I perfect? No! But I try to express unconditional love everywhere I can.

Human beings do often love conditionally, mostly out of fear. But, just for today, I think it would be good to remember that many, many people risk their lives every day to save those of others. I am in the very center of the massive flooding going on in North central Pennsylvania, and I know many people who have lost a lot. One of these people is a karate instructor named Joanne. Her dojo, the building she owns where she teaches karate, is under two feet of water right now. It has been flooded before, and she has had to rebuild it. She is going to do so again. Why? Because she feels, and her many students and their families and her friends all feel, that she is making a difference in their lives because of her teaching. This is a great demonstration of unconditional love. It is going to cost her thousands of dollars to rebuild, and I know she still owes money from the last flood.

Please take a moment to honor all those people, past and present, who show unconditional love all the time. It is especially fitting to do so on this day, the eve of the tenth anniversary of 9/11. It would hurt me to write about "conditional" love on such a day as this.

To the memory of those who perished on 9/11, and those who died in the war that followed,


September 10, 2011 alt text

Image courtesy of gstatic


answered 11 Sep '11, 02:11

Jaianniah's gravatar image


Wow Jai this is a wopper of a beautiful answer and yes there are heroes in this world that give their lives for others. Today we shall remember and be forever thankful for those special heroes. There is no greater love a human can live than to give his very life for the safety of another.

(11 Sep '11, 08:22) Paulina 1

thats easy its because of ego and ignorance. in truth i tell you if you would love people as you love your self with no condition like you would also want to have it then you would be on the right path. is it not said :

Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”

37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’[a] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[b] 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.

experience and enjoy.


answered 10 Sep '11, 08:34

white%20tiger's gravatar image

white tiger

Love your answer White Tiger.

(10 Sep '11, 08:38) Paulina 1
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