I am fairly new to meditation and have had times when I have meditated that I find tears streaming down my face, and I can't find a reason why that makes sense, apart from one possible one. To get to it I have to go right back to my childhood:
I used to sing in the school choir, and loved singing Christmas carols. I also had a very religious Godmother who made us go to church once a week, though she went every day. One day when I was 11 I observed some behavior by some parishoners at the church I attended that made me see the hypocrisy of many people who go to church. They had not even left the premises before they started their malicious gossiping about someone ahead of them. As an impressionable child I was horrified and decided that I couldn't go to church anymore if it meant so little, and that I would find my own way.
I love Christmas, and since then there have been many times over the years thatI have started singing Christmas carols and got choked up, so I couldn't give my voice to them fully. When I have tried to find an answer inside myself as to why I got so choked, and why I have had tears running down myself when I have been meditating sometimes, the only answer that I can think of is that it is something to do with some feeling of loss or separation from God, or maybe even relief to be rejoining. I can't find a satisfactory answer though.
Has anyone else experienced this? Does anyone have any ideas as to what is behind it?
This goes very deep and is a very hard thing for me to share, but I really want to see if I can resolve it.
asked 09 Oct '09, 20:34
Barry Allen ♦♦
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Rebecca, singing and meditation are very powerful emotional triggers because they tap into the deepest matters of the heart and mind, or may I say soul. They are, in a real sense, cathartic mechanisms that release the emotions that are attached to significant issues in our lives. I think you've already hit the nail on the head with the background of your question. You've experienced both loss and disillusionment. As an impressionable girl of eleven, who should have been able to look up to adults (especially religious adults) as role models, they showed you the harsh reality of the human condition. We are imperfect. We make mistakes. We do not always treat others as we should. But as life went on, you learned through your own mistakes, faux paus, and deliberate meanness, that you are still essentially a good person inside, despite all of the negatives.
The tears, I believe, are a cleansing for you. An acceptance of people's faults as a part of human nature, but a recognition that we can love them anyway. And I do believe there is a deeper issue you have touched upon--the separation from God. If the human soul was meant to have union and communion with God, if we have experienced any of that "belongingness", then any separation by our choice is bound to impact us emotionally. Your efforts through meditation and the memories and feelings that are stirred by Christmas carols and other songs, have the effect of restoring something that was lost.
I know that in my personal life, I am most deeply impacted by scenarios in movies or on television that portray reconciliation betweeen separated family members and loved ones; and yes, it sometimes makes me cry like a baby.
answered 14 Oct '09, 08:01
In spite of my separation from the an organized church it didn't stop me from looking for answers through my life. I always instinctively thanked God when good things happened, and shared my luck with others in some way. However, I also learnt from my parents at an equally early age that we are all we know we have . Other things I heard myself say were that it's no good looking over our shoulders at the past, or planning too much for the future, as NOW is all we know we have and we should make the most of it.
(14 Oct '09, 14:52) Rebecca
It is not easy to turn a deaf ear to people saying how bad things are and instead to look within and to create my own truth, especially when I have been sucked into adding to their opinion and, apparently, creating more of the same for myself! I know I have created amazing things when I have focused on them, but I need to find something big to get my teeth into again! I'm working on it .... all of it.
(14 Oct '09, 15:02) Rebecca
Though I came to the conclusion that God was within us, I didn't find it easy to understand that God was also around us. It is only in the last couple of years that I came to understand about God being all around us and as close as our skin, by discovering Quantum Physics of all things. I am still trying to understand 'thinking matter' as it has been described, and have questions because I am, at heart, a logical person and like to understand how things work, but I also can accept the concept without them and believe.
(14 Oct '09, 15:07) Rebecca
It is getting to the place of knowing unconditionally that I am working to. And, by the way, thank you for your answer which felt the closest to the truth of the matter.
(14 Oct '09, 15:08) Rebecca
Just as I finished writing the above and truly in keeping with the path being put before my feet as I walk .... the doorbell rang and some books I ordered from Amazon just arrived. Abraham Hicks The Vortex and John Randolph Price's The Abundance book. I opened the latter at page 28 and it was a message straight to the heart!
(14 Oct '09, 15:29) Rebecca
I'd love to "chat" now since you're clearly online now, but I have to leave for a while. I'll probably catch up with everything later tonight. Glad things are going well for you, Rebecca.
(14 Oct '09, 15:33) John
"This day ... I cease believing in visible money as my supply and my support and I view the world of effect as it truly is ... simply an outpouring of my former beliefs. I believed in the power of money, therefore I surrendered my God-given power and authority to an objective belief. I believed in the possibility of lack, thus causing a separation in consciousness from the Source of my supply. I believed in mortal man and carnal conditions and through this faith gave man and conditions power over me. I believed in the mortal illusion created by the collective consciousness of error thoughts..
(14 Oct '09, 15:33) Rebecca
.. (quote continued) and in doing so, I have limited the Unlimited. No More! This day I renounce my so-called humanhood and claim my divine inheritance as a Be-ing of God. This day I acknowledge God and only God as my substance, my supply and and my support."
(14 Oct '09, 15:36) Rebecca
I can't express how strongly that message reached me at exactly the right moment. It's part of the 40 day prosperity plan in the tiny book.Yes, John it would be nice to chat, but I also have to go for now. Is there a place for people to chat here? Apart from this public arena?
(14 Oct '09, 15:39) Rebecca
Wow, Rebecca, that's good stuff! You should put that into an answer to one of the questions, like "Is the mind unlimited?" Oh, I just logged on and saw we are tied 466 to 466 (not that I'm counting). So I took a screen shot (for evidence) and now I can retire happily (yeah right). Seriously, thank you for letting me catch up. :-) It really doesn't matter...really. I'm just enjoying this so much and I'm benefiting so much from all the questions, answers and comments and links. I really am content with this journey. Thanks for all your insightful remarks!
(14 Oct '09, 19:54) John
I'm not aware of a place to chat, but this will suffice, I guess. Take care.
(14 Oct '09, 19:56) John
After what I read today I really don't care about who is in front! :>)
I can't recommenm this small book by John Randolph Price highly enough. I had to kill some time and read about half of it and found the whole thing spoke to me straight to the heart. Amongst other things it includes information that makes me understand my strong reservations about most organized religions, and mentions the Gnostics, whose writings were influenced by the teachings of Jesus, emphsasising the one-ness of God and man, the divinity of each individual and the creative power of each soul to rise above limitation.
(14 Oct '09, 20:55) Rebecca
It would appear that my rejection of the accepted mainstream church teachings and my seeking of knowledge and the way I have been is because I have been trying to connect with the spirit of those teachings - literally and metaphorically. Today that chink in the doorway to understanding crashed open like it had been kicked in. For all that the path before this led me here, and I still embrace what I found, this encapsulates those teachings in a very direct way while explaining some of the historical background, and charting when independant thinking was first attacked in ...
(14 Oct '09, 21:01) Rebecca
... AD 180 by Irenaeus, Bishop of Lyons, who believed that a spiritual consciousness and a personal union with God would undermine the authority of the priests. He persecuted the Gnostics and then made lists of accepted books that would fit his fixed dogma (sound familiar?). "The shift in mind-direction from within to without had begun, and the innate power of the individual was gradually given to an outer structure and a lower authority. When Emperoro Theodosius made Christianity the sole and official religion of the State in 395, the Institution assumed complete control over individual ...
(14 Oct '09, 21:06) Rebecca
(Quotes above ended)This little book of only 80 small pages is a real power-house of information, and I recommend it to all. I don't know if Psi-tech has it? The Abundance Book by John Randolph Price
(14 Oct '09, 21:30) Rebecca
I don't know...haven't checked. I'm glad you're finding it so illuminating. Have you added it to the question about what books have most influenced you? I think you should.
(15 Oct '09, 07:09) John
The book doesn't appear to be available at PsiTek.
(16 Oct '09, 05:40) John
@John - clear and to the point, thanks "big" brother ... :)
(12 Jan '12, 00:45) blubird two
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When be begin to go within to seek answers, past experiences that have been buried or even forgotten come to the surface. The re-surfacing of these past events are triggered by our longing for answers. When we can't figure out a way to deal with our emotions during stressful events our subconscious steps in to protect us.
Your subconscious kept these events hidden from you until you were ready to deal with your unprocessed emotions. Now that you are searching for answers to questions you have about your life, your subconscious feels that it is time to process the emotions and that it is safe to reveal what was once buried.
Continue meditating through the tears, re-live all of the events that come to mind... Only this time remain conscious of all the emotions that are going on inside of you... Do not allow your subconscious to change the subject (re-bury the emotions)... Don't be surprised if other emotions pop up. Re-living these events may trigger other things from your past that have been buried as well.
After you're done, you'll feel like a weight has been lifted from your shoulders.
Remember life is a journey, you may not get it all out the first or the second or third time for that matter... Persistence pays...
You're well on your way to a better you!
answered 09 Oct '09, 23:29
Thank you Shonta. Yes I continued meditating through the tears, and no events came to mind at all, just the tears. I don't know if they are tears of relief or sorrow, or joy. But I can sing carols again! :>)
(10 Oct '09, 00:39) Rebecca
Rebecca, I cry a lot during meditation as well, and music also makes me cry, (stirring me deeply inside) so we have that in common. I like Shonta's answer, and it helped me understand. Best wishes....
(10 Oct '09, 00:55) LeeAnn 1
Thank you! Best wishes to you too :>)
(10 Oct '09, 01:14) Rebecca
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Rebecca your body has the answer like your mind does. I heard of an lady her name is Janet Cook and she is on you tube. She practices The Rubebfeld Synnery Method. Her e-mail is email@example.com and her web site is www.body.bodywhispere1.com
She says our body holds all of our history in our cells and that we have to listen to our body and hear what it is saying to us. She is very good. She has an office and maybe going to see her will really help you it is worth a try. She is real nice too and it took her years to be able to do her work in her office. If I have typed something wrong and you can't get her let me know. Hope this helps.
answered 10 Oct '09, 08:11
When it comes to music I can be a 'cry baby'. There is a lady online that has a method for curing people that involves recording the patient's voice an sending back a cd with sounds to readjust the person.
Like you, I love Christmas carols. It is music that unites hearts and brings joy to mine.
answered 11 Oct '09, 17:06
rebecca your heart is in the right place but it is not solve with your mind and it is still bugging you. all that is true it might not have meant alot to those hypocrites but it meant alot to you. and you still are trying to find the way to god. i would suggest that you meditate and solve those veils of the mind. be still and calm and know that i am. experience and enjoy.
answered 11 Jan '12, 16:29
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Thank you for your courage to share something that is very personal and hurtful for you. I think you have the answers already in your own thoughtful considerations. I'll add my own answer below. Peace!