And you are not sure in what way to do it?

I only feel genuinely good when I clear my head of "distractions", so to speak, and feel like I am empowered, focused on what I want and not just on what feels good at the moment. Changing my focus feels icky. An example would be, if I am bothered by being too fat, I can't get relief unless I am focused on changing that in a way that feels productive. Until I get that relief by controlling what I eat and exercising, everything has a background feeling of tension, anxiety, like you left home and have this feeling that you left the gas on or the door unlocked. Once that relief is generated, the current situation (in the example, being fat) loses its emotional charge because I know it is on the way out.

I guess another way to put it would be, unless I am certain that I am on the right track to getting what I want, I can't relax. In the above fat loss example, I trust that controlling my diet is all I really have to do and so it feels good to control my diet because it gives me relief. But what about when I don't really have any idea what to do even after extensive research and therefore don't know how to generate that genuine sense of relief by getting my hands "in the clay" (like height increase)? Now people say I have to relax because that is the right track but then I am stuck in a catch 22.

I like being in control. That is just my personality. It is why I was addicted to games and still today sometimes take refuge in them. I have been able to achieve things that way. Most of the time when I just "relaxed", things didn't go very well. I hate failing and not being able to tell myself "This was the problem, this is how to fix it", it builds a sense of frustration and helplessness. I like being able to pinpoint why I didn't achieve a certain result and what needs to be different. I also like to overkill, to do more than is actually necessary just so I don't run the risk of failure, at least in certain areas. Now sometimes in life it is fun to not be in control, to try and do high-risk maneuvers full of uncertainty, to just play the game and see what happens but other times it's not fun at all.

So how do I get over all the airy vagueness of this "law of attraction" and feel the relief of certainty and clarity?

asked 22 Feb '13, 19:51

flowsurfer's gravatar image


I've been thinking about the issue you have with controlling things Flowsurfer and this turned up this morning , a Source/HigherSelf perspective ........

"Your concepts of past and future are totally made up. They’re an illusion created by the limitations of your perception. These limitations are not actually real in our reality and therefore neither are the ideas of past or future.

You see, in our reality, we experience Timelessness. All past memories exist now and all future possibilities exist now, just in other dimensions. It’s not somewhere mysterious “out there,” but quite literally right here!

In the same way that you know that’s what’s going on to your left and what’s going on to your right, and that all it takes to find out is to turn your head and look, we can just as easily turn our heads and look into the past or into the future and see all of it right now in this very moment.

It’s a piece of cake for you tell someone to your left what’s going on above you, what’s happening in another dimension. For us it’s just as easy to tell someone in the “present” what we see in the “past” or tell someone in the “present” what we see in the “future.”

In fact, if you’re open to listening, I’d be glad to guide you towards the most harmonious future because I can already see it now. I am you. I am the part of you that exists in another dimension, but you feel cut off from me because you can’t perceive me with your five physical senses. I am you. You call me your higher self. I am like an additional set of eyes that can see in other dimensions.

I would LOVE to guide you towards harmony and well-being because I am you. In fact, that is my role. You can trust me. I have no reason to guide you towards suffering because I am you. We are not separate. I am simply the aspect of you which has a “better view.” I can see every future possibility throughout all time. I’ve got a fantastic view from up here and I’d be glad to help share my view with you to help you orchestrate your life.

alt text

I know what you want because I am you. I know what is in your highest good because I have a great view from up here. Your will is my will. There is only one will. I will guide you towards experiencing Love, Joy, and Well-being in your physical world because your joy is my joy. I am you.

Listen to what I have to say, allow yourself to be guided by my voice, and watch how your life seemingly magically, or what you would call synchronistically starts to fall into place. You will experience yourself in a state of flow as I line up events and circumstances perfectly at just the right time.

The only way I can communicate with you is to communicate to you through your non-physical sixth sense. You call this sense your intuition or inner voiceless voice.

Have you ever felt deja vu? Have you ever felt psychic? Clairvoyant? Had an intuitive hunch? That’s actually me telling you something from another dimension. That knowingness is literally you looking out through time and communicating to yourself through the language of feeling that ABC may happen if you take this path or to look out for XYZ. It’s just a result of being able to perceive additional dimensions. There’s nothing spooky or magical about it.

All you need to do from your limited physical plane is to quit trying so hard to control things. I can do all the heavy lifting for you and find an effortless way to make things happen. The pathway of least resistance is very clear to me. All your suffering is due to ignorance, not in an insulting way, but simply because you can’t see how to best act in the world in order to make things happen the way you wish. You are misperceiving the way things actually are. If you’ll let go and trust me, I will guide you to the highest states of joy imaginable.

Trust me. I am you. I love you."


answered 23 Feb '13, 22:49

Starlight's gravatar image


@Starlight On one level, that answer makes me feel good. On another, I have this uneasy feeling of not having that "inner voiceless voice" to guide me, of not being able to "hear" it. Which leaves me just as confused as before. If I assume this to be true, how do I develop the "skill" of listening to my intuition? Because right now the only way I find any relief from confusion and the sense of being adrift is to at least try to make sense of things and try to "control the flow".

(23 Feb '13, 23:35) flowsurfer

@Starlight I want to "trust my higher self", I am very much interested in that. I don't like having so many puzzles to solve and would happily turn that over to a higher perspective. But I don't feel any sort of guidance when I try to, I just feel adrift.

(23 Feb '13, 23:53) flowsurfer

I understand where your coming from , none of us just woke up one morning and it was all switched on , it's all part of the learning curve , by no means have I got it all down pat , some days are better than others and I forget that my higherself has infinite longrange binocculars .Think of it this way , would there be any point in going on a train trip to see a the scenery , if you already knew what it looked like , there's no adventure in that.

(24 Feb '13, 00:38) Starlight

I drove from 1 side of Australia to the other & return 8,080 klms on my own in a tiny car, GF's freaking out,coming up with all the what if's, even men friends didn't think I would follow through given I'd always had a husband who did long distance driving , but I "trusted myself " went with the flow each day and had a beautifull uneventfull trip , people were so lovely,helpfull, discounts here and there , the right accomm's turning up etc , so much easier when we let go of the how and when :-)

(24 Feb '13, 00:48) Starlight
showing 2 of 4 show 2 more comments

You are a light in a water,clay. that hand is the extension of the clay. Do you not like the experience that you are having right now?Why because you think that clay is not the right clay? Because someone some where decided that your clay need to be taller?Who made him judge of that?If you agree with him and is discremination,then yes you will be not happy and stay in that state of self pity of your own accord.You have free will change that situation change path if it is something out of your control,then your path might be somewhere else,seek and you shall find.Maybe doing to much is what is causing your failiure in the first place,stop going in to extremes it does not serve you and make you worry for nothing. You have free will and of that you have control,as for other people free will they have that control not you. each one is responsible of is own free will.You want to get out of that catch 22?Seek and find your balence your inner peace, if i would ask you one question right now where do you see your balence and inner peace at? Can you focus and imagine it clearly in truth?


answered 22 Feb '13, 21:53

white%20tiger's gravatar image

white tiger

"Why because you think that clay is not the right clay?" - Because I think the experience is not the right experience; I do not enjoy it. I am the one that decided how tall I want to be. I only mention the opinion of others regarding height because I respect other people's free will and recognize that in order to engage in trade with them, I have to give them what they are willing to pay for, not what I happen to have available. Why do you insist in judging me for wanting what I want?

(22 Feb '13, 22:27) flowsurfer

I find balance and inner peace in what I have described as what I want. It is not simply something that "excites me", it is not what you might describe as an ego-driven desire, it inspires a feeling of "home", of love, of peace. It feels like something completely natural and meant to be and every attempt I make to turn to something else due to doubt that it can be real makes me feel unnatural and shallow.

(22 Feb '13, 22:31) flowsurfer

@white tiger I am not sure you understand that the reason I speak of wanting to be a model and resist just "getting a job" is because the requirements to be a model do not clash with who I want to be while the requirements to work at a random job do. I didn't decide "I want to be a model" and then learned I had to be six feet tall. I decided who I wanted to be in every sense, including but not limited to height, then realized from there that modeling would be the ideal career for me to follow.

(22 Feb '13, 22:41) flowsurfer

@white tiger So just stop with all your judgement, it doesn't affect me. There is nothing you can say that will ever move me even an inch from what I want. If you want to help me achieve what I want (not what you think I should want), help, otherwise just please don't bother me.

(22 Feb '13, 22:48) flowsurfer

@flowsurfer re doubt

Re getting that job you REALLY want

It's important you listen to the very end , Esther delivers an eye opener . Good Luck.... I know you can achieve your dream :-)

(22 Feb '13, 23:40) Starlight

@flowsurfer you should listen to your self.Because you do not understand neighter me nor your self.I did not judge you but told you only the truth but you are not ready to handle the truth.the fact that you do not understand me does not surprise me,But the fact that you do not know your self and do not even listen to your self of your own free will tell me all i need to know,since the beguinning i have tried to help you,But you prefer to see me as judging you and you do not want me to bother you

(23 Feb '13, 03:09) white tiger

-so i will not bother helping you anny more if that is what you want.It is your free will after all.

(23 Feb '13, 03:11) white tiger

@Starlight - love the videos, thanks

(23 Feb '13, 04:07) ru bis

Most Welcome @ru bis :-)

(23 Feb '13, 22:39) Starlight
showing 1 of 9 show 8 more comments
Click here to create a free account

If you are seeing this message then the Inward Quest system has noticed that your web browser is behaving in an unusual way and is now blocking your active participation in this site for security reasons. As a result, among other things, you may find that you are unable to answer any questions or leave any comments. Unusual browser behavior is often caused by add-ons (ad-blocking, privacy etc) that interfere with the operation of our website. If you have installed these kinds of add-ons, we suggest you disable them for this website

Related Questions