I used to be a calm,sweet and lovely person,hope i still am..:).

Being like this people have stereotyped me as "a person who is satisfied with life even if something bad happens" and lately bad things which I don't want/like is happening a lot,at the same time small small good things keep happening as well,but when we gauge bad over good,right now bad wins.

So when something bad happens to someone,people will cite me as an example "see how she is dealing with her fate,yours is not that bad,so relax" and even some of my so called friends have said these things to my face itself.

God! how I detest that,they call themselves as my friends and be so insensitive.

I want to stop feeling like this,it makes me feel envious,i will always end up in self pity-the old story why nothing good ever happen to me inspite of being such a good person?

Then I will start musing over the fact that I am not that good...may be i m a bad person.....

Can someone help me,what am i doing wrong that is stopping me from getting what I want?

Hope you got what I am trying to put across

Thanks in advance,


asked 03 Nov '10, 10:11

Bliss's gravatar image


edited 03 Nov '10, 10:28

Barry%20Allen's gravatar image

Barry Allen ♦♦

I think the crux of your problem lies in this sentence - "I want to stop feeling like this, it makes me feel envious, I will always end up in self pity-the old story why nothing good ever happens to me in spite of being such a good person."

Self pity has a very negative, addictive type energy attached to it. When we get caught uo in that energy it is very easy to spiral downward and believe all those stories that are going around in our head. The more we feel sorry for ourself the more momentum those thoughts gather, attracting other similar thoughts until there is quite the drama going on in our mind. And remember what we think we will begin to attract, so the Universe brings us situations and people to confirm those stories in our head.

The good news is that those stories can be changed and we have the power to do that.By changing our thoughts we change our mind and as a result our physical reality begins to change accordingly.

Maybe begin by discarding the "used to be" in your first sentence and replace it with a definitive "I Am". At some level this is what you believe so it should be an easy belief to install - " I Am a calm, sweet and lovely person and good things are happening to me", affirm this consistently.

When you feel yourself slipping into self pity mode, try to catch it as early as possible and realize that you can change that story. It will probably take some time and quite a bit of consistent effort but don't give up, no matter what appears to be happening on the surface,know that underneath ( within your mind) things are changing and your physical world will have to change in accordance with this.


answered 03 Nov '10, 14:00

Michaela's gravatar image


Thanks Michaela.....I also want to stop being envious and stop comparing myself to others.....what do you suggest I do for that?..:)

(04 Nov '10, 07:14) Bliss

When we feel 'envious' of another, it is usually because we fear that there is a 'lack' or 'not enough' for us. The best way to surpass this is when you notice the envy within yourself, instead make a conscious effort to wish the other person well. By consistently doing this you will begin to shift your perspective and start to realize that there is 'more than enough' for everyone and really nothing to be envious about. If it is character traits in others you envy, make the effort instead to let that person know how much you admire them and remember those same traits are within yourself,

(04 Nov '10, 11:20) Michaela

you just have to work at cultivating them. By admiring as opposed to being envious, you will eventually have that shift within and begin to emulate what you do admire.

(04 Nov '10, 11:22) Michaela
showing 2 of 3 show 1 more comments

Bliss dear, there is a lot that is happening nowadays. Basically, when you accumulate more light, which is what you've been doing throughout your life, darkness is dislodged. It isn't you, all those bad things and feelings. They are coming to the surface because they are going bye bye. What you need to do is let them go. Don't hold on to any of it. And stick to the course of love and light. Do forgive yourself and your friends, it will soon pass.

Blessings, namaste


answered 03 Nov '10, 11:03

daniele's gravatar image


Thanks Daniele..but how do I know that I am letting them go,how can I be sure that I am not holding onto any of it..:)

(03 Nov '10, 11:52) Bliss

Quite simply set your mind on looking at the positive aspects of it all instead of dwelling on the negative.

(03 Nov '10, 14:28) daniele

Ya i have been doing that but again something more bad will happen...then i will just get fed up and watch TV or do something else that will let me run away from all this....lately i m not even keeping touch with all my friends as they will start on advising me....and i don't really like that nowadays....and i brace myself at these times coz these advices are hurting me...making me think i m a failure which I know I m not..:)

(04 Nov '10, 07:21) Bliss

It is ok to escape for sometime by watching tv and avoiding your friends. You are as though in a cocoon now and need the time to sail through this. Trust all is well and will be well. You are simply evolving and things will work themselves out.

(04 Nov '10, 08:01) daniele

@ Bliss, I am in a similar situation right now and I almost felt like I was reading my own thoughts here.. thanks for asking this question and thanks to all those who have answered.. :)

(04 Nov '10, 15:23) AVBhat 1
showing 2 of 5 show 3 more comments

bad things happen to good people, its just the devil tryna bring u down, keep fighting and doing right it will pass when he sees that his trickery won't turn u to the bad side, don't take any drugs that's what he wants u to be on drugs and medication u don't need those all u need is to stay clean keep eating and work hard to keep a check coming in, an the devil works threw people so try not to keep yourself around a lot of people because he can use them to get to u. Ull be fine just stay to yourself


answered 20 Feb '13, 16:03

itzmeawj's gravatar image


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