Have you reached a place, on the emotional guidance scale, or a level of peace within, that you have stopped, or overcome suffering? Considering that we probably mostly all agree that suffering is a matter of perception, then If so, 1. how did you get to this place? and 2. Does this mean that you have an absence of 'negative events' OR that you have chosen not to suffer even though your back is out or there is a flood, or whatever 'negative events' still occure, that you choose not to allow these events to cause you suffering? Thanks

asked 05 Aug '11, 14:29

Fairy%20Princess's gravatar image

Fairy Princess

In his book "The Road Less Travelled," M. Scott Peck has this to say about suffering:

Life is difficult.

This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths; the first of the "Four Noble Truths" which Buddha taught was "Life is Suffering."

It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know life is difficult, once we truly understand and accept it, then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.

I think that's where I'm at in my life. Instead of focusing on the obstacles, focusing on the ways to overcome them. This manifests in the simplest of things: I have a desk job where I spend long hours in a cubicle. This is hard on the body; I frequently have aches and pains everywhere. But they seldom bother me, and the remedy is exercise, so I know what I need to do.


answered 05 Aug '11, 15:45

Vesuvius's gravatar image


edited 31 Aug '11, 04:43

Thank you for your answer. I don't understand what you mean though. How do you know you have aches and pains everywhere if they seldom bother you? Do you mean bother as in you don't have negative feelings toward them or that they don't hurt, or you don't notice or feel them most of the time?

(05 Aug '11, 15:49) Fairy Princess

Do you mean bother as in you don't have negative feelings toward them or ... you don't notice or feel them most of the time? -- Yes.

(05 Aug '11, 16:07) Vesuvius

If all pain and ails are from emotions and thoughts, then how would it be from sitting at the desk in the cubicle? How do you know you have pain if you don't feel it? I am sorry, but I am confused.

(06 Aug '11, 01:35) Fairy Princess

Very good answer!

(12 Aug '11, 15:14) Maria 3
showing 2 of 4 show 2 more comments

All suffering is different and some days you might suffer phyisicaly and others emotionaly or spiritualy. Some days are a real bummer and you might suffer from more than one form and most of the time one form of suffering leads to another. What you have to relise is that even though there is plenty help out there for all types of suffering the choice must be yours to seek help or help yourself and to transcend the suffering. You have to want to get better and out of your suffering. Only you can make this choice for no one can do it for you. You will be suprised how many want to stop their suffering but dont do anything about it.

Accept the fact that you are suffering and than make the choice that you dont want to suffer anymore. Once the choice is made that you dont want to suffer any more do something about it. Tell someone about your problem for no one can help you unles they know that you have a problem. Seek help from a doctor or psychologist or an elder or an expert that is apropriate for your type of suffering but seeking for help is the best thing you can do. Once you have found help it will be much easier for now you have support and advice and someone to monitor your progres and leed you on till your suffering is over.

This is the way that I stopped my suffering and I hope it helps you too.


answered 06 Aug '11, 01:11

Paulina%201's gravatar image

Paulina 1

O course when you get advice from your doctor or whoever you should listen and follow their guidance.

(06 Aug '11, 01:14) Paulina 1

In life there are allways positive as well as negative events but one learns to accept certain things and avoid others what does happen though is that you become more peaceful by changing the way you react or dont react to certain situations.

(06 Aug '11, 01:19) Paulina 1

What is suffering? Wouldn't one change ones beliefs do the same as eliminating suffering? There is emotional,psychical and spiritual. If one choose not to believe that a situation causes "suffering" then wouldn't the suffering stop.
Mind over pain is possible. Many people have been "cured" from phobias and other psychological situations thus ending there suffering.
Much suffering that people observe is not happening now. So there is no suffering just the memory or the perceived fear/stress of future events. The flood will seceded and the back will heal. Believe that!


answered 05 Aug '11, 17:30

ursixx's gravatar image


Do you personally experience suffering? do you experience pain without suffering?

(05 Aug '11, 19:07) Fairy Princess

@Fairy Princess.. Just saw your comment today... made me think "suffering". When do I suffer? What is Suffering? How do I experience suffering ? Do I suffer? I have no chronic psychical pain..so there is no suffering there for me but I know people that do and have empathy for there pain and situation.I do get a semiannual migraine that kicks my butt . I have the realization that this will pass and it's more like enduring it than suffering. And the same could be said about emotional pain ...

(02 Jun '13, 04:16) ursixx

...I don''t have any real heavy personal trauma but I do empathy for those that do... so right now I can say I have not had any pain that I could not endure...

(02 Jun '13, 04:34) ursixx
showing 2 of 3 show 1 more comments

I feel this is a great time to remind that negative, gritty-feeling emotions are very good tools that pinpoint to an out of date or out of alignment belief system.

Occassionally from time to time, though it is very rare to me these days, I will have an overwhelment of considerably bad emotions, and whenever that happens, even though the experience is hell and I dont want to experience it, I am always using those moments as positive effects- feeling bad is great for me, because it points to me a belief system I can change so I can enjoy my life even more, and be even more happy, fun, exciting and sexy.

I'm not answering your question very well but thought this would be a good place to chip in my thoughts. In future I would get really specific with what the term "suffering" means, as it is often tossed around in many religions and metaphysical systems but I've no real understanding of what they're getting at.

So, paradoxical to not enjoying bad emotions, I love it when those experiences arise as it just means more growth, acceleration and evolving. I like to drive my red cars very fast and its purely a way I can keep the smile on my face beaming for longer.


answered 02 Jun '13, 04:48

Nikulas's gravatar image


Suffering has, and always will be, one of life's greatest conundrums. On the one hand, we all experience some suffering- whether of the mind, body, or spirit-on the other hand, we ask why our world was made this way...why God allows suffering...why some suffer more than others...and so on. I, personally, have been through a great ordeal in these last two months. I did suffer, sometimes so badly I wished for death.

I even asked a question about screwing up during this ordeal, and was supported and enlightened by the answers. I felt that my situation (being addicted to pain medication, and deciding to stop it all) led me into suffering, and now that I am popping out the other side, at least for now, I see the insights and growth in myself as a result of enduring the suffering, which was grueling and intense. In my insanity, I also quit smoking, too...a truer masochist you may never see again...LOL! (I figured if I was going to be miserable, I'd get it ALL over with at one time. I am glad I did.)

But have I overcome suffering? Have I found a way to always endure it, should I suffer through some other ordeal? Sorry, folks. One of the many insights I had through all of this was that suffering is very, very personal.

You discover You when you suffer. You find that every situation is unique in and of itself. I found my best comfort in reading through the online blogs of those who had gone before me in getting off Fentanyl, a very powerful pain med, and not the only one I was prescribed. I found out all the things I described in "My Great Screw-Up" post, and more. I am still not out of the woods. I have endured six headaches that rendered me blind for a time and were painful beyond all words; I had a seizure; I cried a lot about my decision and its consequences.

But have I overcome suffering? In this case, perhaps I have. But if you speak of the death of my Father five years ago, you would find that I am still suffering greatly from his sudden and unexpected death. That pain is altogether different and altogether handled in a "whole 'nother way", as we native nearly Wisconsonites like to say...

C.S. Lewis, a famous Christian writer, addresses this issue in his book, "The Problem of Pain". attacks this issue with his usual wisdom:

"Not many years ago when I was an atheist … ". There follows a compelling picture of a universe filled with futility and chance, darkness and cold, misery and suffering; a spectacle of civilizations passing away, of human race scientifically condemned to a final doom and of a universe bound to die. Thus, "either there is no spirit behind the universe, or else a spirit indifferent to good and evil, or else an evil spirit". On the other hand, "if the universe is so bad, or even half so bad, how on earth did human beings ever come to attribute it to the activity of a wise and good Creator? […] The spectacle of the universe as revealed by experience can never have been ground for religion: it must always have been something in spite of which religion, acquired from a different source, was held"

Suffering will always be with us, but so, too, will there be always the opportunities to learn about ourselves and our own courage in the bearing of the suffering. It is this demeanor that actually defines who we really are!

Blessings, Jaianniah

Quote from: http://www.catholiceducation.org/articles/apologetics/ap0032.html


answered 09 Aug '11, 09:45

Jaianniah's gravatar image


well when i was a child i would just make it go away. and my mother would ask me where did you cut your self or get that bruise? and i would say what cut or what bruise i do not remember. some pain i can still make go away some other are more hard to make go away and sometime they come back. but yes you can focus else where and forget the pain it does not have to affect you. some dentis or medical clinic use hypnotherapy at the place of medication. so yes if you are able to control your mind you can suffer alot less. as for negative event you can change them in positive one. why see only the bad in a negative event? example: you dig a hole in your ward and you find some big rock doing it. well someone could find it negative saying that is heavy it is more work. another could find it positive and say how nice i needed those big rock to do the front of the house or to build a small wall for my flower. experience and enjoy.


answered 31 Aug '11, 04:54

white%20tiger's gravatar image

white tiger

edited 31 Aug '11, 05:02

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