Certain relationships in life help us grow and thereby succeed in life, help us achieve what we desire and overall help us move ahead in life. They actually empower us and I call them empowering relationships.

Now, all of the empowering relationships are not necessarily good. Some might indirectly empower us and some might do it directly. And, some relationships are so unpleasant and though they play a big role in molding you to a good and useful shape. For example, my relationship with my father. It is not at all like a normal father-daughter relationship and had really damaged my emotional self which is almost done repairing. But I thank God for this because, only due to this in my life, I have taken major decisions of coming out of my comfort zone and achieving lots of things that otherwise I would not have been able to achieve in such a short time.

I am sure many of the inwardquesters have experienced this.

I realized this relationship was actually making me stronger after 14 years. Is there any other method to know if the relationship is actually good for you? Is there a feeling associated that can be identified or is there some way we can find out and save ourselves from either removing ourselves from the relationship or staying unhappy for a longer amount of time?

asked 22 Mar '12, 05:12

Perfection's gravatar image


Everything has a purpose and is in a way empowering to you. If you allow that which you are focused on serve its purpose to you, it will enrich you and help you grow. And upon allowing the purpose of that thing to ourselves, the purpose of that thing immediately changes.

However if it feels like that thing is causing you pain. It is because you resist its purpose to be served to you. And in a way you resist being your true self.


answered 22 Mar '12, 05:31

CalonLan's gravatar image


Dear Perfection, All relationships will make us grow but unfortunately some of them can cause us physical, emotional, psychological or spiritual pain.

Human beings are born with free choice in life at least the adults are. It is up to all of us to choose when we have had enough. It is fine to say that problems and hardships will make one stronger but problems and hardships can also leave us physicaly, mentaly and emotionaly weaker.

The choice is yours to decide yes this relatioship might not be perfect but it makes me stronger or this is a poisenous reltionship and is destroying me. If it is destroying you than do something about it and distance yourself from that person.

The following are not good relationships. If someone habitualy puts you down and makes you feel small and useless and worthless. Or any and all physical violence or mental cruelty. Distance yourself from such persons and don't associate at all with the violent ones.

I'm all for spiritual growth but when you realize enough is enough that is also growig by empowering yourself.


answered 25 Mar '12, 17:25

Paulina%201's gravatar image

Paulina 1

a relationship shouldn't be empowering. it is u that must be powerful 1st and then all relationships will beneficial. I just did a vid on this where I talk and no channeling evolved.

TReb channeling - Rob talks about Relationships. (loving urself)


hope it helps,

love n light



answered 14 Aug '12, 21:08

TReb%20Bor%20yit-NE's gravatar image

TReb Bor yit-NE


"We must first be powerful, than all relationships will be beneficial" Great point!!

(14 Aug '12, 22:06) LapisLazuli

@LapisLazuli ty very much. It is somthing that is a must or u wont be able to sustain a relationship. It all is an inside job

(14 Aug '12, 22:20) TReb Bor yit-NE

@Treb, relationship as anything, I believe, should be of an evolutionary nature. Not stagnant or something to merely sustain. For stagnation turns into despair.

And while I agree that one must be powerful within in order to have powerful relationship, we can't probably never answer which came first - egg or chicken? I mean, do we first learn to be powerful inside and then use it for outside, or do we use empowering relationship to grow strong within? ;)

(15 Aug '12, 05:03) CalonLan

@CalonLan i think u are absolutely right. That's why we connect with other people. Because we need to have the self love practiced. With ur question, it is a combination of the both. I don't think we can learn with only one. It almost has to be both, dont it? very wise my freind, very great idea. thank u :-)

(15 Aug '12, 07:46) TReb Bor yit-NE
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