I realize now that I have low self-esteem and it permeates every aspect of my life. which is probably why even when I think I've cleaned up a limiting belief after a while either it pops up again or I find myself having developed another one which is just as destructive as the previous one - if not more. Looking back I can see how I have sabotaged myself in various areas of my life from social to financial so that the general graph of my life has gone from really high to really low. I know that unless I can find a way to raise my self esteem in general nothing else will work.

Does any one have ideas on how to raise self esteem when it is the overriding problem? By-the-way self affirmations have not worked for me so far because I really do not believe myself when I say them - that's how deep rooted this problem is. All ideas will be welcome.

PS: There is a similar question on self-esteem on IQ but it deals only with a certain aspect of it - the answer I'm looking for is more all encompassing. So IQ plz don't [close] this question.

asked 14 Aug '12, 17:06

I%20Think%20Therefore%20I%20Am's gravatar image

I Think Therefore I Am
5.2k432105

@I Think Therefore I Am- Feel free to download this paraliminal .Its called the Self-Esteem Supercharger.It has 4 tracks to it which play as one recording

Track 1 http://db.tt/d50O1cbA

Track 2 http://db.tt/CCZvKwQl

Track 3 http://db.tt/GCvKzheg

Track 4 http://db.tt/sy6sbjVU

(14 Aug '12, 17:51) Satori

@I Think Therefore I Am- It really helped me a while back.You should start to see positive changes within a week if you listen to it everyday with headphones.You can read about them here. 

http://www.inwardquest.com/questions/1939/how-do-paraliminals-work-and-have-they-improved-anything-in-your-life

(14 Aug '12, 17:54) Satori
1

@I Think Therefore I Am - Here is a method for using Self-Esteem Supercharger effectively: http://www.inwardquest.com/questions/12540#48659

(14 Aug '12, 21:12) Stingray
1

@Satori Thanks for sharing!

(15 Aug '12, 03:37) ursixx
1

@Satori Thanks for sharing these I have downloaded them n I'm going to start listening to them today.

(15 Aug '12, 07:09) I Think Therefore I Am
2

@Stingray I'm always amazed at how you manage to remember the answers you have previously given and then reference back to them when a similar qs. pops up. Hell I can't even remember the qs. I have asked. Sometimes I go through the IQ page n say that's interesting n then find out I had asked that qs LOL

(15 Aug '12, 07:19) I Think Therefore I Am
1

@I Think Therefore I Am, stingray is a great mind. he has memory of a steel trap.

(15 Aug '12, 07:48) TReb Bor yit-NE

@I Think Therefore I Am- @Ursixx-Your very welcome, hope it helps:)

(15 Aug '12, 08:15) Satori
1

@Satori I have put these tapes on my cell phone as well so that is easier for me to listen to in the morning and when I'm travelling as well.

(15 Aug '12, 17:42) I Think Therefore I Am

@I Think Therefore I Am-Thats a great idea.By the way here is the instructions for this paraliminal: http://db.tt/6HRxNxZN

Let us know how you get on,thanks:)

(16 Aug '12, 04:46) Satori
3

@Satori n @Stingray I have been using these paraliminals for a week now and my mood seems to have lightened. I am finding it much easier to deal with my mom these days and in fact I am constantly joking around with her so she too seems much happier. Its almost as if a weight that had been weighing me down has become much lighter so I am no constantly thinking in a negative loop.

(20 Aug '12, 06:57) I Think Therefore I Am

@I Think Therefore I Am- Great to hear that, thanks for sharing:)

(20 Aug '12, 07:47) Satori

@I Think Therefore I Am - Yes, that is good to hear :)

(23 Aug '12, 08:04) Stingray
showing 0 of 13 show 13 more comments

There has been planted a seed in your life. A seed of low self-esteem. Probably by someone you held in admiration and respected. And they too have had the seed planted It would be hard to find someone that the seed has not been planted in there life..When we are young our fields of our life are so open. We develop a variety of plants from the seeds .Some are nurtured and watered and cared for by choice or by habit..The older you get the more these plants can spread if not prune and till under the soil of you reality.and on the other side the more selective one can become to what seed and plants shall grow !
Now
What is the best way to get rid of a plant?

A:Stop watering it. Every plant needs water ,without water they will wilt away . yes some are more hardy than others and will take longer but eventually... So when you get a low self-esteem thought do not acknowledged it(water it).
But who can stop the rain? True

B:You to get on your knees and pull it by the roots you weed out the plants you don't want. And besides let call it like it is theses are weeds that are taking over !
Now you will need tools to get at the roots.... there are a number of methods from the answers on Inward Quest I'm sure someone will recommend eft also. Find the tool that fits best in your hand.
But..There are so many!!True.

C:Hire a gardener. they can help you identify the weeds. Help you pull a few teach you methods of removing and nurturing the the healthy plants and avoid planting new weeds.. Get professional help, sit with a goal motivated professional and get to work on being happy!
But....

D: All of the above. or combinations of the above ..But realize that you want flowers and productive plants in the soil of your reality.. You want to be happy NOW..
peace

link

answered 15 Aug '12, 04:29

ursixx's gravatar image

ursixx
22.0k11445

edited 15 Aug '12, 04:34

1

Love this!

(15 Aug '12, 13:04) LapisLazuli

I had a period of quite low self-esteem a while ago, and my Law of Attraction coach gave me an exercise which might seem quite simple, but is in fact really powerful.

All it was, was to spend 5-10 minutes each day writing down things I liked about myself, no matter how small they were. In fact, this is a great exercise for any part of your life that you are unhappy with. Once you start looking for the positives, you will find more and more over time.

It was a little bit cringe-worthy at first, and I couldn't always think of things to write, but this simple little exercise actually helped me a lot over time.

link

answered 15 Aug '12, 12:13

cassiopeia's gravatar image

cassiopeia
4.0k1130

This is one of the first things a counselor had me do years ago. It is a little hard in the beginning but it was a great starting point for me & helped me a lot over time, too.

(15 Aug '12, 12:45) LapisLazuli

here u are my dear friend. if u feel as if u have low self esteem, it is as easy as knowing u r worth loving. PLEASE LISTEN TO THIS,,, man.... i made it today and now,,.,,, BAM... i knew i had to do it for a reason,and i hope it finds u well.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aiESuF7nWWk

i love u and u are worth loving. i promise this.

i have something i think u will need, IT IS GREAT,,, and it inst my work and it is free.


The power lies not in the realty but rather, the discussion itself.

I cannot change the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination. - Jimmy Dean

How to win friends and influence people.

  1. Don’t criticise, condemn or complain.
  2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
  3. Stimulate enthusiasm. (let them cook and stir the idea on their own). Arouse in the other person an eager want. Success - Dr. David Harold Think

  4. Set a definite goal

  5. Quit running yourself down
  6. Think of all the reasons why you can be successful.
  7. Trace your attitudes back to your childhood.
  8. Change the image of yourself by writing out the person you would like to become.
  9. Act the part of the successful person you want to become. This is the only price to pay for success. Think and Grow Rich

The ability to direct our mind. Faith is not something you earn, faith is something you already have. Most are using it in reverse gear.

  1. Define your purpose in life.
  2. Mastermind alliance
  3. Going the Extra Mile.
  4. Applied Faith.
  5. A Pleasing Personality.
  6. Self Discipline.
  7. Positive Mental Attitude.
  8. Enthusiasm.
  9. Personal Initiative. Personal preface

There are only two kinds of emotions. One feels good and the other feels bad. (emotional scale) Emotions can be divided into three pillars:

  1. The emotion of Love and Appreciation.
  2. The emotion of Sex.
  3. The desire for financial gain (freedom, independence and expansion). The four horseman of bondage.

  4. Poverty.

  5. Fear.
  6. Illiteracy.
  7. Superstition.

DEFINE YOUR PURPOSE

Get a pocket sized notebook Page 1 - Major desire. My idea of success. Page 2 - Clear statement of what I am willing to give. Memorize both Statements. Repeat a dozen times day. End with gratitude.

Reprogramming your mind: “Oh divine providence, I ask not for more riches but for more wisdom with which to make wiser use of the riches you gave me at birth, consisting in the power to control my own mind, to whatever ends I desire.”

Birth also comes with two envelopes.

RICHES ENVELOP

  1. Sound Health.
  2. Peace of mind.
  3. Labour of Love (inspiration and bliss).
  4. Freedom from Fear and Worry.
  5. A Positive Mental Attitude.
  6. Material riches of your own choice and quantity. Prices to pay for neglecting.

  7. Ill health

  8. Fear and Worry.
  9. Indecision and doubts.
  10. Frustration and discouragement throughout life.
  11. Poverty and want
  12. A whole flock of evils consisting of Envy, Greed, Jealousy, Anger, Hatred and superstition. MASTER MIND PRINCIPAL

  13. Two or more people, working together for a pre-defined purpose.

  14. Going the extra mile.
  15. Applied Faith. Mental Attitude to attain whatever is desired (Law of Attraction).
  16. Capacity for belief. Believe and you shall receive. DO THE FOLLOWING for the Masterkey

  17. Decide definitely where you wish to be and what you wish to be doing.

  18. Decide how much money you desire to be making and what you are going to do to earn it.
  19. Form a Mastermind alliance with at least one person in your immediate family and at least one other person among those to whom you are selling your services. Facts to Remember:

  20. Control your mental attitude and make yourself agreeable with everyone with whom you are closely associated if you expect friendly cooperation in return.

  21. Remember that you are where you are and what you are because of your mental attitude in which you relate yourself to other people.

  22. Success is something that has to be earned and success is something that must be planned. Success is the knowledge to get what you want out of life without violating the rights of others and helping others to acquire it. Luck is something you can create for yourself if you follow the rules.
  23. Your own real limitation is the one you setup in your own mind. HABIT OF GOING THE EXTRA MILE

7 Days to transformation

QQMA - Quality of service + Quantity of service + Mental Attitude determines the space you occupy in your chosen calling and the compensation you get from your services. Some do it unconsciously.

Benefits:

  1. Bring you to the favorable attention of others.
  2. Place back of you the natural law of increasing returns bringing back greater compensations
  3. Will make you indispensable. Write your own ticket.
  4. Help you to excel in your line of work.
  5. Gives you preference over others.
  6. Law of contrast (others only go half mile).
  7. Improves your personality and makes you liked by others.
  8. Develop a keen alert imagination.
  9. Inspires you to move on your own personal initiative.
  10. Gives more courage and removes fear of criticism of others.
  11. Helps you master the destructive habit of procrastination.
  12. Influences other people to respect your integrity.
  13. Definiteness of purpose.
  14. Provides you the one and only excuse for asking for a promotion or higher pay.
  15. Conditions your mind to maintain a Mastermind alliance with others. If you believe it, you can do it.

APPLIED FAITH

Capacity for belief! Mental attitude where you remove all fears and doubts and direct it to where you know you can achieve it. Opens the first envelope. Must be cultivated and maintained.

  1. Know what you want and believe you can and will get it.
  2. Give expression of gratitude many times during the day for the things you want even before you get them (set vibration).
  3. Keep your mind open to hunches from within. Move on your own personal initiative.
  4. When overtaken by defeat, remember that man is tested many times before crowned with success.
  5. A burning desire is the starting point of applied faith. Believe and act.
  6. When doubt creeps into your mind, remember what man believes he also reaps.
  7. PLEASING PERSONALITY. (Stands at the head of the list of riches.)

  8. Determines whether people are attracted or repelled.

  9. Display your character to the world.

  10. It’s your trademark, how people recognize you.

  11. Determines your success or failure through life.
  12. 30 different factors and traits that make up your personality.
  13. Mental Attitude (Felt by others through telepathy). Soft and pleasing, courtesy and consideration.
  14. Flexibility of Mental Attitude (or lack of it irritable or angry). Impossible to make anyone to make you angry or irritated. Control your reaction to what is going on.
  15. Enthusiasm - turn it on and off. Uncontrolled enthusiasm opens doors to manipulation.
  16. Sincerity. Cannot be faked.
  17. Plus 26 others.
  18. Habits that destroy a pleasing personality.
  19. Breaking in and running away with the conversation.
  20. Sarcasm expressed by insinuation and wisecracks.
  21. Vanity expressed in either words or actions.
  22. Indifference in listening while people are speaking. More profitable to be a good listener...Apt to learn something.
  23. Flattery where flattery is not deserved, brings quick resentment.
  24. Finding fault with the world at large and people in general. (Direct conversation to those things that are right.)
  25. Challenging those with those we do not agree.
  26. Volunteering unsolicited advice....intolerable bore.
  27. Speaking of physical ailments, worries and personal problems.
  28. Superiority is a sure fire way of destroying popularity.
  29. Envy.
  30. Slovenliness in body, clothing and posture always repels others.
  31. Plus 5 others. SELF DISCIPLINE

. Is the only means by which we may transform sorrow to happiness. . Self Discipline is the only means by which we may shut out of our minds the deadly effects of past experiences of suffering and defeat. . Self Discipline can free us. . Self Discipline is the only means by which can live our own lives and have power over our own thoughts. 1. Gain mastery over your tongue. A loose tongue is a great liability. 2. Self discipline for striking back. What we do to others comes back in kind, greatly multiplied. Write it in the sands on the beach where it can be washed away by the tides. 3. Self discipline over all emotions, love, hate, fear and sex. (make you or break you) 4. Self discipline in relation to mental attitude. Drives away friends, destroys opportunity, brings on physical and mental illness, develops stomach ulcers and makes peace of mind impossible. 5. Self discipline over the emotion of Sex is the most powerful of all emotions. 6. Self discipline in relation to dieting and fasting. 7. Self discipline in relation to Religion and Politics. 8. Self discipline of taking possession of your mind and directing it to whatever ends, you desire. Taking the path of least resistance makes all rivers and some men, crooked. (In thoughts and actions)

A POSITIVE MENTAL ATTITUDE.

  1. Learn to adjust yourself to other peoples state of mind and difficulties in order to get along peacefully and refrain from taking notice of trivial circumstances, by refusing to allow them to become controversial incidents.
  2. Establish a fixed system of conditioning your mind at the beginning of each day in order to keep it positive under all circumstances.
  3. Learn the art of selling yourself to others by “indirection”, such as asking leading questions which will bring out the desired reactions and do not allow yourself to be drawn into arguments over unimportant subjects.
  4. Adopt the habit a good laugh when angry or irritated. Start each day with 1 minute of laughing.
  5. Start each day with an expression of gratitude for all previous failures, defeats and adversities. Search for the seeds of an equivalent benefit. Give thanks for the blessings that will be received for the day.
  6. Learn to concentrate on the “Can Do” portion all of your problems and start action where you stand in carrying out this portion. Find out what it is and do it.
  7. Learn to transmute all unpleasant circumstances into immediate action, which calls for a positive mental attitude. Make it a fixed habit. Switch to action on a hobby or major purpose in life and keep it focused for 5 minutes.
  8. Recognize that every circumstance which influences your life, whether pleasant or unpleasant is bisques?? for your mill of life, and so use it to make it pay dividends, one way or another. Strength grows out of struggles. No such thing as an “unprofitable” experience.
  9. Look at life as a continuous process of education and learning wisdom from both pleasant and unpleasant experiences. Expect!
  10. Make the world over to fit the pattern that you choose. Begin with yourself with self improvement that will make you open minded, patient and generous in your relation with others.
  11. Express gratitude twice daily for the fact that you recognize you have complete control over your own mind. Ask for guidance so you may use this profound gift wisely in all thoughts and acts.
  12. Go out of your way to comment enthusiastically on the good qualities of those with whom you live and work. Do not mention negative qualities. Observe what goes around.
  13. Accept all criticism of yourself as an occasion for self examination to determine how much of it is justified. You will be sure to make startling discoveries about yourself that will help you the remainder of your life.
  14. Do not accept from life or anyone else what you do not desire. Passive resistance.
  15. Two kinds of circumstances that make you worry. Those you can do something about and those you can do nothing about. Nothing except use passive resistance and refuse to allow them to worry you.
  16. Keep your mind eternally engaged on what is desired...major purpose in life. (rubbing elbows here with the great master key of success) (Law of Attraction)
  17. If you feel sorry for yourself, look around and find someone worse off and give them help. Make this procedure a habit. What is done to or for others, you do to or for yourself.
  18. Find and emulate those people who you would like to be. Hero worship but pick wisely.
  19. Cultivate your tone of voice so it has a pleasing musical sound. It is an open window through which others people look into your very soul. If you are engaged in selling, it will pay off in monetary dividends. Practice daily.
  20. “Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve”. Display prominently at home and at work. You are the only person who can provide you with a positive attitude. Upon this rests your entire future.

ENTHUSIASM

Like steam in a boiler, when enthusiasm is controlled and turned on, starts the wheels of machinery into action. It is how we may put into action our education, experience and knowledge.

  1. Emotions are not immediately subject to reason but are always the immediately subject to action.
  2. Knowledge becomes power only when it is put into action for the attainment of a definite objective.
  3. Develop a feeling of enthusiasm. Your brain and every other person’s brain is both a transmitter and a receiver sending out thought vibrations and picking up those of others.
  4. You can send out thoughts that influence others without ever speaking a word. (Silent Enthusiasm)
  5. Enthusiasm is contagious regardless if negative or positive.

  6. Known to psychologists and used by master salesman to condition the minds of potential buyers before they ever talk to them. Conditions the mind to respond with the spirit of enthusiasm.

  7. Enthusiasm is one the most important traits for leadership.
  8. When meeting people: a. Turn on your enthusiasm and modulate your voice. Make the other person feel like you are happy to communicate with them. b. “How do you do, I am very glad to meet you.” + quick firm squeeze on every world. c. Direct the subject on something that interests the other person. d. Follow through with eager questions focused upon the other person. e. In order to sell yourself to others, you must first sell the other to themselves.
  9. Read out loud with enthusiasm every day for 10 minutes. (Find 10 different subjects of interest).
  10. Enthusiasm is easily expressed when one is inspired by a burning desire for something or any motive associated with one’s closest interests.
  11. Three basic emotions that motivates the world are the emotion of love or affection, the emotion of sex and the desire for financial gain. This can convert a mediocre person into a genius. Move with enthusiasm and see how much better you will feel.

PERSONAL INITIATIVE

To be successful, you will need to learn to act on your own initiative.

The men who stand out are those who chose their own occupation and moved on their own personal initiative to achieve their own personal interests. A winner never quits and a quitter never wins. Big success is made up of a great number of little circumstances, each so small and seemingly insignificant, most people pass them by as not worthy of notice.

16 Attributes of personal initiative

  1. The person who follows the habit of personal initiative, has a definite major purpose in life and a plan for attaining it.
  2. A mastermind alliance with those essential in achieving his major purpose.
  3. Necessary persistence and the will to win to carry him along when the going gets hard and he meets with obstacles.
  4. Makes decisions promptly when he has the necessary facts on which to base them and changes them slowly if at all.
  5. Follows the habit of doing more than he is paid for in a pleasing and positive mental attitude.
  6. Takes responsibility for everything he undertakes and never passes the buck when things go wrong.
  7. Can take friendly criticism without resentment because he has learnt to profit by them. Positive Mental Attitude.
  8. He knows what the 9 basic motives are which inspire all human endeavors and never requests anyone to do anything for him, without giving them adequate motive for doing so.
  9. He never expresses an opinion about anything unless he has thought the subject through and he is willing to state how he came to that opinion.
  10. Follows the habit of listen much and talking only when he has something to say that will benefit himself or others.
  11. Has a well developed sense of observation of small details and knows his job from the smallest detail to the greatest.
  12. He never tells anyone to do anything without telling them why it should be done and how it may be done best.
  13. Follows the habit of concentrating his full attention on one thing at a time.
  14. Positive attitude when in communication with others.
  15. He will give you a direct answer, even if he has to tell you he does not know the correct answer.
  16. He never puts off until tomorrow that which should have been done last week because he knows that procrastination is near the top of the list of failure.

No one will tell you what to do and no one will tell you what not to do.

“There are two kinds of men who never amount to much, those who cannot do as they are told and those who can do nothing else.” - Kurtis

LEARNING FROM ADVERSITY

A Positive mental attitude is the only way to convert adversity into an asset. REMEMBER: Nothing can be called failure unit you accept it as such.

IMAGINATION

The workshop of the ??? of our brain and the ??? of our souls. 2 forms of imagination

SYNTHETIC IMAGINATION

Putting together ideas, facts in a different combination.

  1. Vision board
  2. Build it in the mind and it will come. CREATIVE IMAGINATION

New ideas, never used previously.

RULES OF ACCURATE THINKING Put down on paper all facts in two columns. Important and unimportant. I don’t have enough facts on which to base my opinion. Most opions are of little value because they are based on

love and light

rob

link

answered 14 Aug '12, 21:51

TReb%20Bor%20yit-NE's gravatar image

TReb Bor yit-NE
14.0k21778

edited 14 Aug '12, 21:55

1

What a short answer.

(15 Aug '12, 08:34) Nikulas

@Nikulas yes it :-)

(15 Aug '12, 13:15) TReb Bor yit-NE

I think this may be down to an unbalanced core belief about yourself. Most core beliefs can best be summed up as "I am not good enough because ...." and are acquired in childhood as a means of getting by/fitting in.

I have come across a set of books about balancing your core beliefs - they look really good and as I am just starting out with them I can't get into too much detail about them at this stage. I feel self esteem comes from these core beliefs and if you can balance whatever core belief you are holding about yourself then your self esteem should automatically rise. Day to day I use focus wheels and find they are by far the best at changing your beliefs but often the deep seated core beliefs can be almost invisible to us as we have become so used to seeing the World through the lens of the core belief.

Anyway I offer the details to you - have a look at the website and see what you think. The books (pdf via email) cost in total US dollars 15 and the man who wrote them is friendly and helpful. I think he does Skype consultations (he is Australian) but he also does a DIY version (ask him for that at the start) for free if you purchase the set of books.

You are good enough - you just have to come to believe that yourself. And just as you acquire your negative beliefs (by thinking it so often that you accept it as truth) so you can choose to think something else.

The books are available from John Nutting at growingaware.com au - they are entitled something like "Balancing your negative core beliefs" - if you wanted to spend less you could email Mr Nutting and ask him which book he recommends. I intend to work my way through the whole lot. The website has a link in the top right hand corner with something like "core belief balancing".

I hope it helps.

(Just to be clear I am in no way connected with this man - I'm not trying to sell anyone anything here. I am just saying you may like to take a look at this.)

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answered 15 Aug '12, 08:53

Catherine's gravatar image

Catherine
4.1k932

edited 15 Aug '12, 18:56

You can walk outside and listen to all kinds of talk, get told that you’re a god or a total bastard. The iron will always kick you the real deal. The iron is the great reference point, the all-knowing perspective giver. Always there like a beacon in the pitch black. I have found the iron to be my greatest friend. It never freaks out on me, never runs. Friends come and go, but 200 pounds is always 200 pounds.” -Henry Rollins.

And I can confirm this. Whenever I feel high or low, I always go lift the iron. I no longer need to persuade myself why to do that. I already know that working out equals a better life. Period.

The more effort you give it and the heavier you lift in gym, the more happiness will life reward you with.

I have many friends who always start working out, elevate themselves from the bottom of desperation and start living happier life, but give up working out for materialism and parties, girls, simply other stuff around them. And down the hill they start to slide again, only to find themselves hit the rock bottom and start working out once again.

But the vicious circle never ends for most of them, because their concept of happiness is flawed, they are looking for it outside instead of within themselves.

And one more, very important in my opinion, point.

You can only be as great as the options you know of.

As you work out, keep your meals healthy and right, YOU GROW. Your body is your TOOL, your OPTION for experience, use it! As your body grows, gets bigger and stronger, your mind starts to see more ways to utilize it in. The options will expand drastically. And not only your body, but also your mind and your soul will rise from their smallness to their greatness.

Weakness leaves, pride comes in, confidence grows - successful life - Greg Plitt

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answered 15 Aug '12, 04:14

CalonLan's gravatar image

CalonLan
(suspended)

I go for a run or do some yoga if I need some upliftment. Exercise has been a huge turning point for me. I do it every day, running, yoga, kenpo, whatever workout videos I have lying around. You feel better, your more confident, more energy, stronger. It helps a lot!

(15 Aug '12, 12:59) LapisLazuli

Dido on the exercise!...I'm a cyclist and doing 30 km with everything you got, your soaked in sweat, experiencing a wonderful "high"....and something deep down inside is saying....."Thank you!"

(15 Aug '12, 21:50) Eldavo

@LapisLazuli, @Eldavo, I especially like the fact that the life's high we get from exercise makes you want to live, like LIVE full speed.

(16 Aug '12, 01:50) CalonLan
showing 2 of 3 show 1 more comments

@I Think Therefore I Am,

I believe I may have posted this before, however, Louise L. Hay is the author of the book "You Can Heal Your Life" and an AWESOME book + cd: "I Can Do It" (http://www.hayhouse.com/details.php?id=856). They are subtle yet powerful resources in regards to heightening one's self-esteem.

She mentions this daily exercise:

Look in the mirror, directly into your eyes and say: "I love you, I really, really love you."

In the beginning, it is likely to be challenging and even uncomfortable. Stick with it. Do this everyday. Every single day. No matter how difficult. Over time, you will begin to feel more comfortable saying it, and likely come to believe it. As you begin to gain confidence in the ability to love yourself, it will create a belief that you do love yourself.

Low self-esteem = lack of self-love. The more ways you find to embrace, love and cherish yourself, the higher your self-esteem will become.

link

answered 11 Jan '13, 12:06

figure8shape's gravatar image

figure8shape
3.8k21850

Start raising your standards: start expecting more for yourself and of yourself. If someone makes a comment about you say its unacceptable and refuse to continue to be in that persons presence. Pretty soon you will start to see mirroring from other people- that you are deserving of only the best and you refuse to accept anything less. Even if it means being a little lonely soon enough you will start to draw the type of people towards you that only respect you very highly and hold you in high regard. When you see people treat you this way (mirroring the way you treat yourself) You will start to believe that this is what is really happening.

If there is one thing to take away from this:

You show people how you want to be treated- by how you treat yourself.

Start treating yourself like you matter- do things that show yourself that you matter- maybe just start eating avocados and apples and fruits and veggies- no dairy or meat and see your energy rise and skin clear up maybe buy one new shirt or pair of pants tidy up a few things in your environment

slowly work your way up to sitting in the back of the car and the front of the plane so to speak treat yourself to the best- even if just a little bit at a time eventually you will start to expect more from others too- more respect, deep active listeners, interesting and generous giving people and you will slowly release those who aren't serving you and aren't appreciating your gifts out of your life

You might need to completely revamp your envrionment- so that you are only around people and events and situations that light you up or who appreciate your gifts and personhood. Its a big shift but once you make it everything else in your life uplevels- and people will respect you in a whole different light- and again you attract more about what you deserve and believe about yourself in your life

its not difficult its just a matter of constantly upleveling, continuing to feel great and give to yourself emotionally, nurturing your energy and body and soul and mind, expanding your expectations and revamping your beliefs- start treating yourself like you deserve only the best

BUTTTT you can start small- you can start today even drink an extra glass of water today get an extra hour of sleep be outside an hour longer give a card to a stranger wear a clean shirt, smile more in the mirror, even if at first it feels goofy, pretty soon you will smile in the mirror and be like "wow you are beautiful, seriously, shiiitttt"- not in an ego tistic way but in a true loving, confident way. ITs AWESOME when you get there. You can feel like a million bucks at anytime you choose to. Choose is the key word. Get in the habit of making that choice and releasing any thoughts that might be your old conditioning. Just say "thanks" or "switch" and then replace with "I deserve only the best" Or "I am a generous and loving soul" or something that is fitting in feeling to imprint into your brain. Hey even stomp around and slap your hands be like " I DESERVE ONLY THE BEST" or "I WILL ONLY ACCEPT TOTAL LOVE INTO MY LIFE AND NOTHING LESS" and stomp and shout and really get it in your bones. Don't feel silly about this- this is what will imprint it for you. You choose what to believe, and you choose to take action to really believe it sometimes going all out in your energy helps solidify it.

I used to have TERRIBLE self esteem, I literally walked with my back hunched over, I was battling eating disorders, sat in the corner of all my classes, I thought everyone hated me, and it manifested in my reality- I was disrepected by my peers and family, taunted, laughed at, people shouted cusswords at me randomly, it wasn't until I went off to college that I started establishing my own rules for my own life and ignored and released anything I didn't want to see.

I now am incredibly healthy, own my own business, have tons of respect in my community and am surrounded by loving, conscious, intelligent and supporting people. Its something I grew into but its possible for everyone. I don't take any shit from anyone ever, or else they aren't worth my time or energy- same with business, etc. I'm not agressive, but I just expect more from all my partnerships and relationships or its not a good fit. I'm desperate for nothing, and I have standards of living. I only associate with people who WANT to be around me and who see the light that I have to give and appreciate it. Because I am that for people I am around also.

Start holding this standard for yourself, and keep at it- develop the habit and you will feel deserving and loved and the awesome person who you truly are in no time. Just keep at it.

Even if you have to fill your mind with good literature on a daily basis- outwitting the devil by Napoleon Hill or Think and Grow rich by N. Hill both are great books that get me jived up about being amazing

another good book- all of the above are probably at your local library but its "28 laws of attraction"- not only feeling attractive but it encourages the universe to give to you what you desire- its a good book to get into the mindset of upleveling...

stay high vibrationally! hope this helps, you are awesome for even coming to this community and posting here- you are on the right path! Stay focused and true!

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answered 11 Jan '13, 12:35

Kanda's gravatar image

Kanda
2.0k32

edited 11 Jan '13, 18:42

This worked very well for me : HPP - Personal Ecology

You think low of yourself? Why do you choose to believe a low-esteemed person's opinion about you?

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answered 11 Jan '13, 09:26

Gumnaam's gravatar image

Gumnaam
4064

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