Unfortunantly, no title will give a respectable definition for what I am trying to ask. For those old users that know me, I ask you grant me the time to read this question, ponder it through, and leave your response...I would be greatly humbled, for through no contemplations on my own can I figure out the meaning and ideas behind this puzzle of mine that troubles my brain countlessly.

2 years ago, I encountered a woman at one of my work places. She was a person whom I felt enormous attraction for, sexually, moreso spiritually though. Her energy was unlike one I have never experienced before, it was almost interacting with a goddess or a fairy. She was instantly kind and generous to me, showed great hospitality with manners and way of being to all people, my initial thoughts were "I didnt even think people like this existed."

What struck me, I will repeat, was her energy. She was stupidly over- enthusiastic about seemingly everything, so much that is was comical.

I quit that work place back then only after a couple of days, because my boss was being unfair in work agreements. I only spent perhaps 8- 12 hours with this girl through the circumstance of working at this restaurant.

After quitting, I had the urge to return to this restaurant, purely to approach this woman as a male and get her on a date with me.

The first time I went there, the boss said she was ill, and wouldn't be in for work for another week....

The next week I went in, I enquired where she was and the bar tender said she was not rostered on work for that week...

The third time I went there, a week later, I looked for her again...I asked another staff member if she was working tonight (according to the bar tender, she was), only to discover that she had left the country and permanently moved back to Europe. The amount of anger, disappointment and confusion inside of me was over-wealming. I did not need her to accept me as a sexual partner, I did not need her approval...I did not need anything excpect that fact that I physically took the action to approach her. I had failed. There would be no way in the world of ever meeting her again.

In the time space of 2 years, after being heartbroken, I went on a sexual (and very fun) rampage of sleeping with many girls....My number ranks in the triple digits. I have experienced relationships with women in great diversities.

We now arrive to this current day, where I am typing this now. I have recently moved homes a few weeks ago, and through idle banter conversation with one of my room mates, I have shockingly discovered that he KNOWS this girl I had my intentions on. Not only does he know her, but interestingly, she has moved back to where I am residing now in Australia.

We organised a party, where she was invited through my friend....This lady would be inside of my house and yet again I would have my chances with her. The day would never come, but it did, almost like a damn fairy tale (This sounds very woosy and I am sounding like a woman here, but its the truth to how uncanny this event is).

On the night of the party, my friend approaches me and informs that she called him up an hour earlier to announce she needed to visit Europe again because her grandmother was dying.

......why the f--- can't I meet this girl? What is it that draws me to her?

In case you did not know, back in 2012 I posted this, this girl described in the post is HER:


Reading that above post I feel embarrassed, foolish, pathetic. I am a very different person now compared to what I was then.

Whilst this is no big deal for me, it is just a fun puzzle I cannot solve. Will I ever meet this girl and close this door for once?

asked 11 Aug '14, 09:09

Nikulas's gravatar image


Hi Nikulas,

In my experience, when the girl is a "right" vibrational match for you, the Universe will either conspire to get you together, or give you enough opportunity and means that nothing will be able to keep you apart.

Although it seems like you have undergone a lot of evolution in the last few years, I would say that the latter part of my answer to the following question of yours still stands...namely, the part about focusing on your ideal rather than any one single individual.


However, it seems that you have already made the decision to focus on this individual, rather than the ideal itself. In which case, you and/or your higher self may simply want to have the experience of this "pursuit." In which case, all I can really say is, "Enjoy!"

I would also draw your attention to the seemingly conflicting energies evident in your statements "Whilst this is no big deal for me..." and "The day would never come, but it did, almost like a damn fairy tale" and "......why the f--- can't I meet this girl? What is it that draws me to her?"

If I were in your shoes, I would work on resolving the apparent contradiction between the energy in these statements, through contemplation and vibrational work.

Good luck.


answered 11 Aug '14, 11:41

lozenge123's gravatar image


@lozenge123 - Nicely said. "Nothing will be able to keep you apart"- Yeah, totally agree. I had this experience with my wife several years ago and, as things have unfolded, we're still perfect vibrational matches. All seemingly effortless: http://www.inwardquest.com/questions/7018#55359

@Nikulas - If it feels like you're having to try to make something happen, you're trying too hard. It's really all about holding a "state of being" and letting whatever matches it flow to you...or not.

(11 Aug '14, 17:52) Stingray

@Stingray - I believe I remember that story of yours from when you first posted it...nice. :) I had a similar experience with my spouse, though not quite so dramatic as yours. At least from my perspective it seemed uncanny, and that's the way I chose to interpret it. :)

(11 Aug '14, 19:05) lozenge123

Why am I so compelled to seek out a particular stranger?

This may sound way too simplistic and also may not be the answer you were looking for but maybe it could be because...

"it is just a fun puzzle I cannot solve"


You are too compelled to find the answer. To compel is to overpower or force. To me that feels like a lot of resistance.

I understand that you are looking at this in a fun way but defining it as "a puzzle you cannot solve" may very well be pulsing back a vibrational match of a fun puzzle that, to this point, is unsolvable.

It may have not started out this way for you in the beginning, but the last minute missed encounters may be putting you into that category.

Definitions are powerful things even though we think particular ways of describing something are no big deal. If it was truly no big deal for you, then why would it matter if you "ever meet this girl and close this door for once?"

As @lozenge123 stated above, there are a few contradictions in your question that you may have to sift through a little bit and find out what's at the core of this desire to know.

My advice would to simply quit caring one way or another and live your life to the fullest in every moment. By doing that, the universe may very well slap you in the face with that big old paradox of unexpectedness and give you the answer quicker than you ever imagined.

I feel that if a face to face encounter is meant to happen then it will. Needing to know just like needing to manifest money, or needing to find a job (as examples) will continue to tell the universe that you do not have it yet.

......why the f--- can't I meet this girl?

Read that again and truly ask yourself if it gives off the vibe of no big deal.

What is it that draws me to her?

The puzzle that needs solving would again be my best guess.

There is a mystery about her that feels like the unknown to you and the more you produce that frequency wave, the more you will experience UN-knowing her.


answered 12 Aug '14, 01:03

Cory's gravatar image


With all spirituality aside Nikulas......Did you ever think of just calling her? Your friend obviously knows her phone number.

That`s the thing with us guys, we try to create this "perfect scenario" where everything is choreographed and timed to the minute, and at the end she will be on our arm and in love. Nickulas, you watch too many Hollywood movies, just pickup the phone! You're trying to do the "bump into each other routine" every time. Stop it! Pickup the phone, talk for 2 minutes, make a date and get off the phone.


answered 24 Aug '14, 23:28

Eldavo's gravatar image


well with the number of time you tried to meet up with her and the number of time that she was not there. I think you are going in opposite direction. She know might know that you are on to her and she might not be on to you. or she might be playing hard to get or it might be bad luck. it is for you to find out. the real question is: Is it that that you really want?

in the first case: you will be disappointed and feel foolish.

in the second case you might not like to have to always run after her so that she feels desire.

in the third case you might not like to always have that bad luck to not being able to meet her.

one thing is sure you should find out what it is, what is the truth about this? and ask your self is it what I want to always run after a fairytale?

So do not stay in darkness solve your division between your different puzzle part and get the big picture.

Let there be light, be the light that you can be experience and enjoy.

experience and enjoy.


answered 12 Aug '14, 22:21

white%20tiger's gravatar image

white tiger

edited 12 Aug '14, 22:24

you allow your mind to believe the
answer to your thought lack of completeness
is her, the facts not supporting your
fantasy fall away logically dismissed,

perhaps a magnetism from under
the stars or a snare of unrequited love


answered 14 Aug '14, 19:23

fred's gravatar image


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