hi all...

there is something that i dont understand about the laws of the univers/attraction.

while "they"(abraham, bashar and other channelers) say that in order to find a relationship (when talking to singles!!!!) we have to be in alignment, meaning remove our dark spot from our heart, love ourselves, etc etc....

At the same time "they" keep talking about other people with "Failed relathionship" who got there because they were not in alingnment or were needy or some other thing...

My conflict is - the people with "failed relationships" were not aligned right? so how come they found a relationship that stuck in the first place(???) when the suggestion is that only the one who is alinged will find his "one"/relationship?

(p.s. it doesnt matter for me that their relathinships are "failed" cause maybe in their perspective its very succesful). and i must emphasize that its not me who judge other people relathionships - i really really dont care. its the channelers (abraham, bashar and more) who talk about them, talk about the masses and how we are the "leading edge" well - maybe i dont want to be in the leading edge - how do i do that? i dont get that

there are way to many conflict for me latly.

(for example - i think that every step on the emotional scale can defined as being alinged if you are in it and not just the happy part. i feel really good when i accept my fear for instance. when i accept each and every part and emotion in me and not ignore the "bad" feelings.

thanks to any answer.

asked 16 Jan '17, 07:44

myself's gravatar image


edited 17 Jan '17, 05:24

IQ%20Moderator's gravatar image

IQ Moderator ♦♦

Remember how Abraham said that you wonder why you attracted green when you asked for yellow and blue?

Well, yellow is your positive relationship, and blue is your negative belief about relationships, and green is the mix of the two- the relationship that just didn't work out.

The first step to get over it is to no longer look at the failed relationship as a failed relationship- look at it as a wonderful opportunity to redefine who you are in relationship to certain aspects of yourself. Also, look at it as a clarifying experience, and be grateful. Then, get the hell out of there.

Note that "get the hell out of there" can mean both physically leaving the person or clearing yourself until the relationship improves (because your clearing yourself brings you towards a more positive version of that person).

In both cases the bad relationship was a excellent focusing tool that prompted you to improve the beliefs you hold about yourself.


answered 27 Feb '17, 06:38

cmc's gravatar image


They found themselves aligned at first...

As I was with my ex-husband... for a brief while. But I should have guessed that a guy who grew up an "Airline Brat", and spent his youth traveling anywhere, for free.... and then two years on ships, courtesy of the Merchant Marine Academy, going all over the world, would find life in a small house with four children, and all their mess and pets (and the pets' messes) confining, and even terrifying. The bills poured in, and I think he expected me to become a "career woman", like the perfectly-groomed women he was meeting on the road Monday through Friday.

But my bliss, and my responsibility (I felt) was to our four children. They were ALL gifted- and I mean gifted... my youngest wrote her first computer program when she was four. These kids ate their dim-witted babysitters for lunch... and they needed somebody to be there, 24/7, and their dad was not home much. He went back to the life he knew as a kid....

And we became different people, with different goals and needs and desires. We "outgrew" each other.

We changed, each do to our experiences. I begged him to talk with me, to share things he felt with me, but he couldn't do it. Not sober, anyway.

That's what happens sometimes.

I was always spiritual...always. He is, at best, agnostic. God was really important to me. My body began to fall apart; it wasn't built for the back-breaking job of a housewife without help. I couldn't help that. I did not know I had CFS or Fibromyalgia, nor did I know I had an immune disorder that kept hitting me and hitting me. I spent hours reading Emmet Fox, and writing, studying spiritual stuff, deep stuff written by people like William James. That stuff put him to sleep. His weekends started becoming catching up on housework, shopping, etc....More and more, not what he signed up for. He liked traveling, and the kids and I hated that he was gone a lot.

People grow apart, and then become new people who attract different people, and they end up married to other people. I "met" Wade learning an advanced Reiki class, and we began a long friendship that transferred to right here on Inward Quest. We married October 17, 2015. It was the happiest day of my life- but life is grandly happy nearly every day with Wade!

That's how it worked for me, anyway. I am glad John found someone who makes him happy. I am so sorry now that I made him unhappy. I really am.

But life is like that. You gotta love it... And roll with it.



answered 17 Jan '17, 05:55

Jaianniah's gravatar image


edited 17 Jan '17, 06:03

thank you @jaianniah for your answer. when i was talking about "failed relationships" i meant couples who managed to STAY togather EVEN though they are or seem needy or dippresed personality or negative etc. the explanations of why people are apart from each other - i know pretty well . i apreciate your answer really:)

(17 Jan '17, 09:58) myself

@myself- I am sorry I misunderstood your question. Perhaps I just have never heard the term "failed relationships" used like this before. I always thought that when a relationship "fails", then people tend to move on...But you were correct in wondering why people who are not "aligned" stay together. It must be that each must be getting something they need or want in the failure. That is the only sense I can make of it... I apologize for my misunderstanding.

(18 Jan '17, 07:20) Jaianniah

right! thank you!! it is just not logical for me anymore that when something is missing it means im not aligned and when i have it = im aligned. i think im ready for a NEW LAW haaaa MARK MY WARDS - THERES GOING TO BE A NEW LAW. I CAN REALLY FEEL IT. BYE ABRAHAM :)

(18 Jan '17, 07:54) myself

People get used to being unhappy and believe it or they become comfortable being unhappy, because they don't know anything else or how to move on.It's called co dependency and it's quite common.It's also referred to as, being married to your problems. Also other things factor in such as financial status and if they have children etc. that will hold a couple together as well. I also misunderstood the question, so I hope this clarifies it a bit better on my end anyway.

(18 Jan '17, 09:37) JLW-W

@myself @JLW-W- I agree with you wholeheartedly, myself. But I should have included in my personal story as to the "why" I stayed- I had nowhere to go, no one who would help me get out, no education and had been a housewife for nearly 30 years... not exactly what one can write on a resume...But I stayed in there because I did not know (and refused to admit the evidence) that he was cheating on me...I really wanted just to focus on how we had changed. Thanks 2 u both!

(18 Jan '17, 11:39) Jaianniah

thank you - "refused to admit the evidence" this means a lot.

(18 Jan '17, 11:45) myself
showing 2 of 6 show 4 more comments

Things come together when you are in alignment and they end when you are no longer in alignment. You are creating your daily life each day when your energy connects to Universal energy, this would also apply with relationships. So as Jaianniah already mentioned, they were in alignment when they first started in their relationship, but then it changed and they grew apart and had different priorities. So they were not in sync anymore and didn't want to be in sync anymore, so the relationship ended.


answered 17 Jan '17, 10:50

JLW-W's gravatar image


edited 17 Jan '17, 12:46

thank you. but then again what about people who are single at 40 or 50 or 60? are they never aligne?

(18 Jan '17, 06:30) myself

That is a pretty general question so it's hard to say because ever individual is different and I don;t know the circumstances with them. Some choose to be single, some may not be manifesting in the right way if they want to meet someone. Also with intention and positive thinking to manifest something, like a relationship it must be followed up with inspired action too. Are you personally struggling with this? That would help to know, to get you started in the right direction.

(18 Jan '17, 10:22) JLW-W

i came to the poine were i gave up the struggle. i dont think,want, inspired to do any alignment work on myself. i've been doing it for years but now it doesnt seem logical to put any effort in it. i believe im perfectly fine and absolutely confident when i say that now its the univers turn to "give back". well maybe by the loa it doesnt work that way but by my new law it certainly does. i actually dont know if i even still want this relationship. i really dont care about anything anymore.

(18 Jan '17, 11:37) myself

In one final thought,keep in mind that you cannot impose your will onto someone else. No matter how hard you work on manifesting a relationship with someone, if that is not what they want or they are negative about it, it won't happen or it won't be positive if it does . Your thoughts rule your subconscious mind and the subconscious mind controls your feelings. Make sure you feel good about everything and anything you manifest, because that's the part of you that connects to the universe.

(18 Jan '17, 11:49) JLW-W
showing 2 of 4 show 2 more comments

Forget about alignment. Go back to the beginning .

  Remember 'Like Attracts Like' ?

We live in a world made up of vibrations. It's vibrational attraction. Similar frequencies.


answered 07 Feb '17, 03:15

ele's gravatar image


edited 07 Feb '17, 03:20

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