I need to clean-up my deep-rooted issues with my parents. I use focus blocks and Faster EFT as part of my daily 30-day vortex challenge. But these issues come up every other day, and even when I have been in the vortex in the morning as a result of my morning vibrational routine, these issues are ruining my daytime.

I often get consumed by rage against my parents, and any possibility of using Faster EFT at that point to neutralise the emotions go out the window.

Later if I try to use Focus Blocks on the issue, I struggle to find statements that give relief. Statements like "They didn't know better", or "They love me very much" only end up enraging me more.

I am sure many people here have similar problems, because problems with parents is far too common, sadly. I need your help.

  • Have you successfully dealt with these problems using Focus Block and/or Faster EFT?
  • Can you give me some sample focus statements that worked for you?
  • How would you handle those periods of rage?
  • Do these issues still resurface now, or are they gone forever?

asked 30 Oct '14, 16:23

cod2's gravatar image


edited 31 Oct '14, 03:33

IQ%20Moderator's gravatar image

IQ Moderator ♦♦

I dealt with issues I had with my father primarily using focus blocks. I did it by breaking down the issues I had into very specific ones, whether present or anything they did in the past that I held against them specifically. Then cycled through them in a random manner.

Examples of topics ranged from "I don't like to answer the phone when Dad calls", "I feel guilty for not wanting to talk to my father" to past issues ranging from "Dad didn't (doesn't) like me laughing or really being happy" to...well, I won't specifically say the extremes since I don't want to accidentally implicate him for anything.

I don't think my statements would really help you since they are specific to my situation and relationship. But some examples are: "A lot of people mellow out more when they get older and my Dad is getting older now", "It wasn't specifically me, when he didn't like me laughing he wouldn't have really liked anyone else laughing either", "He wouldn't have tried to .... in his right state of mind", "He hasn't done anything to me for years now" etc.

Well, I actually didn't have much contact at all with my father and had plenty else going on in my life so they didn't rise up much (except when he called me). Focus blocks pretty much deals with anything for me - if for some reason it doesn't from a general sense then it always has when I break things down more specifically.

I actually didn't "finish" all the ones I wrote down (I notice now since I'm looking through all of them archived) but no, none of those issues with my father resurface now. I have a fairly good relationship with him now and in fact recently he has been saying how much he wants me to come see him and stay with him for a few weeks when I have the free time (and he wants to pay for all expenses like travel - he lives in a different country from me).


answered 30 Oct '14, 16:51

Liam's gravatar image


Thank you. I never thought of going specific.

(31 Oct '14, 02:06) cod2

@Liam, you've just given me the idea of creating separate focus block files for my big problems in order to cycle through them faster. I have about 100 focus blocks in my current spreadsheet, so even though I find focus blocks efficient, sometimes it takes a while before one of my big issues pops up, hence they've been slow in clearing.

(31 Oct '14, 12:37) cassiopeia

@cod2 Glad I could be of some help.

@cassiopeia If you're using stingray's spreadsheet you can set the big issues to priority and then cycle through those ones using CTRL + SHIFT + X (or if with his newer one you can create hubs). I used to make it a "rule" for me that when I would sit down to do random focus blocks I would always do a priority one first. That said, maybe you'd enjoy an entirely separate file for them. I know I've done that before too. :)

(01 Nov '14, 01:21) Liam

@Liam - I didn't know that, how do I set them to priority? I think I'd like to create separate ones anyway for my Big Deal stuff, but it would be good to know how to prioritise things in my general FB file too.

(01 Nov '14, 07:16) cassiopeia

@cassiopeia - In the version 1 spreadsheet (which you are probably using, I guess), go to the Summary sheet and put an 'x' in the Priority column of every Focus Block you would like to be included in the CTRL + SHIFT + X random rotation.

For the version 2 spreadsheet, you can have this done automatically by linking all the relevant blocks to a HUB and just pressing CTRL + T on any sheet linked in the HUB or the HUB sheet itself. I call this "Topic Blasting". The purpose of this feature is...

(01 Nov '14, 18:02) Stingray

@cassiopeia - ...for precisely the scenario that @Liam has outlined in his answer i.e you start with a topic that isn't shifting for some reason and start to break it down into more specific sub-topics that comprise it, and shift those instead. To identify the sub-topics, you can use the approach that @releaser99 has mentioned of asking "How do I know I have a problem?" or, alternatively, use a question like "Why don't I have what I want yet?"

(01 Nov '14, 18:06) Stingray

@Stingray - I am using fb-beta-3, but I like the sound of using hubs to group topics. Where do I download the latest version?

Many, many thanks for all the work you've put into this spreadsheet and for making it available to all of us. I resisted the focus blocks method at first but after using it for a while I really see how effective it is!

(02 Nov '14, 06:19) cassiopeia

@cassiopeia - "Where do I download the latest version?" - See the "Update 3" section of Focus Blocks Spreadsheet for instructions. There's also a new "secret" :) manifesting experiment (Manifesting Experiment 6 - The "Focus Minutes" Method) that's been released with the latest spreadsheet. The current version of the method relies heavily on that spreadsheet to work, so it's only available in that spreadsheet users group for now.

(02 Nov '14, 06:41) Stingray

Thanks! :)

(02 Nov '14, 11:03) cassiopeia

I just downloaded the beta 3 version of the spreadsheet and I am currently watching the training video.

My goodness me! All I can say is "wow"! Seriously @Stingray, this is an unbelievable tool that you have made available to the public free of cost. It's incredibly powerful and it'll make my morning routine insanely easier. Don't know how I lived without it for so long!

Thank you!!

(02 Nov '14, 16:38) cod2
showing 2 of 10 show 8 more comments

I think @Liam's advise is excellent in regard to dealing with those issues using Focus Blocks.

You need to make sure that you get specific enough to provoke the emotional intensity within your body. Because when you feel your issue(s) clearly, you can work with them quickly and effectively.

The same goes for EFT or Faster EFT. In my experience, when using (Faster) EFT you often have to be even more specific.

Robert Smith of Faster EFT suggests to find specific references to your specific problem. So he asks "How do you know you have a problem?". Depending on your personal internal processes, you could then come up with answers like

  • "I know I have a problem with it because this and that happened in the past."
  • "I see a specific memory in my head from the past regarding that problem"
  • "I just feel it in my body"
  • "I see a face, a place etc."
  • "I hear my father saying this and that"
  • "I can almost smell such and such"

It seems that the fastest way to get rid of a problem (and all of its aspects) with EFT is to come up with specific memories, list them all, make yourself feel them strongly and neutralize them all until you feel zero resistance when you think of them (See table top analogy). I have worked with a few people and have neutralized all of their memories to deep seated problems in a few minutes or less than an hour using Faster EFT. That's really cool!

It's essential to tap on all the aspects of your memories (feelings, beliefs, faces, your own facial expression, sounds etc.) until everything feels neutral. Robert Smith also suggests to change the memory completely and make it a positive one. So every time you think back, it feels good and it's a positive experience for you.

Personally, I can rarely come up with a specific memory. For the most part, I just feel something in my body and it isn't always intense. When tapping on those internal representations, it seems to take hours (and sometimes even days) to neutralize a problem.

That's why I prefer Focus Blocks for deep seated issues the way @Liam described it. So you have to find out what works best for you.

But the key to deep and lasting changes is to be as specific as you can, whether you are using Focus Blocks or (Faster) EFT.


answered 30 Oct '14, 19:15

releaser99's gravatar image


I'm not sure if any of these statements help, but sometimes you only need to pick one or two that resonate and it can put you on the right track.

*There are times when I have felt that his gloom is crushing my spirit. 

I find myself wishing he could focus on the positives, that he would laugh and smile a little more.

I wonder if I make him happy and whether he wants me around. 

Now I am a little older I have had a little more life experience.

Underpinning these times is nothing more than two people who have lost their rhythm. 

When I see the slightest symptom of him feeling better, I'll talk about that

We're only one facet of each other's multifaceted lives.

When I am not with him, I'm gonna pretend he's improved

I'm gonna make an effort to be more positive about his condition

I'm going to work at making our time together as rich and loving as it can be.*


answered 04 Nov '14, 19:10

Bluebell's gravatar image


edited 04 Nov '14, 19:11

Click here to create a free account

If you are seeing this message then the Inward Quest system has noticed that your web browser is behaving in an unusual way and is now blocking your active participation in this site for security reasons. As a result, among other things, you may find that you are unable to answer any questions or leave any comments. Unusual browser behavior is often caused by add-ons (ad-blocking, privacy etc) that interfere with the operation of our website. If you have installed these kinds of add-ons, we suggest you disable them for this website

Related Questions