It has been mentioned before that in order for you to change your life, the first step you would need to do is to first accept where you currently are and then take it from there. But this acceptance seems like it might backfire at times, an example being people might end up taking advantage of you. Example:

-You don't like your job and your colleagues keep dumping extra work on you. You think "It's ok for my colleagues to dump extra work on me now as I have put myself in this situation and accept where I currently am now". But as the days go by, your colleagues continue to dump more and more extra work on you since you don't really voice out anything (but in your mind you think its ok - you accept it).

-You live together with your roommate and he often takes your things without your permission. You bought a lot of snacks from the supermarket but your roommate finishes them in less than a few days. You think "It's ok for my roommate to be doing this now as I have put myself in this situation and accept where I currently am now". But as the days go by, your roommate continues to be doing the same thing, since you don't really voice out about his actions (but in your mind you think its ok - you accept it).

In the above scenarios, it seems like in certain situations when you try to accept something and let it be, you may end up getting taken advantage of. So what is the correct way to genuinely accept something in order to make your current reality change?

asked 25 May '15, 10:41

kakaboo's gravatar image


Acceptance of where you are is really just trying to put yourself into a more neutral state so that the things that you do not like can get a chance to peter out from your experience.

If you don't like and, therefore, feel bad about your roommate taking your things or your workmates giving you too much work then you have to keep getting that over and over because it's what is most active in your vibration, your dominant thoughts. A negative feeling triggered by the negative thoughts about those scenarios have to attract more of the same. You're asking for more and more if it because of your (negative) attention to it.

If you can shift your vibration to focus away from the things that bother you in your life and towards the more positive things in your experience then your vibration can shift because you're holding yourself in more of a 'feel good' place.

If you spend more of your time thinking of the good things that surround you rather than the things that you view as 'bad' then you can attract more good things to you and the bad will peter out through lack of attention.

Anything and everything that you are observing in your reality is only there because of your attention to it. So, what we're all trying to do is put our attention mostly on good (positive) things because where attention goes manifestation always follows.


answered 25 May '15, 11:32

Yes's gravatar image


edited 25 May '15, 11:34

@Yes so you are basically saying that just accepting may not be enough at times? Acceptance helps to put you in a more neutral state but more work has to be done sometimes to become more positive?

(28 May '15, 05:31) kakaboo

@kakaboo I would say that, yes. If you look at the EGS I would say acceptance is equal to contentment/boredom. It's a neutral state, all the negative sting has gone out of it so you would be able to feel calm regarding things. To be in the vortex on a subject or even just feeling vortex-aligned on a consistent day to day basis the setpoint is always extremely positive: appreciation/love/enthusiasm/excited etc

(28 May '15, 18:47) Yes

At the moment I feel very unmotivated to desire anything more. I'm not particularly happy and my life hasn't improved, but just think "well it is as it is".... I can't work out if this is a step forwards or backwards in terms of manifesting?

(28 May '15, 21:33) Inner Beauty

@Inner Beauty you might want to check out this answer by corduroypower: You are probably at stage 5 or 6.. then something will happen to help you hit stage 7, but if you are unable to maintain that stage, you go back to pre-stage 5 and everything starts all over again in a loop

(28 May '15, 22:21) kakaboo

Thank you so much @kakaboo! Definitely at stage 5. Probably have been at stage 6 and now gone back... but what makes you hit stage 7 I wonder?!!! :-) Persistence and getting on with applying all these learnings I guess.

(28 May '15, 23:34) Inner Beauty

@Inner_Beauty, I think in myself that when I wobble back and forth from "feeling pretty good" to feeling gloomier, it might have to do with feeling bored! The tipping point where you are low-resistance but there isn't much positive momentum yet can feel very boring and disengaged. Then if I focus on those feelings, they increase, and I start feeling worse. Vs if I lean in the other direction, very gently. I think at this point for me this is still really subtle stuff it's easy to "misread"...

(29 May '15, 02:34) corduroypower

...Abraham talks about "catching it in the early, subtle stages". I think it can be easy when you're not quite yet a LOA wizard (I am definitely not there yet) to miss the early low-momentum resistance. "I feel a little bored. Why do I feel bored? What if this doesn't work? Do I just have to be patient forever? What am I doing wrong?" So you can go between "boredom" and much lower vibes over and over until you start to see the momentum at work and you can "stop doing that thing you do".

(29 May '15, 02:37) corduroypower

@Inner Beauty I would like to think that I have hit Stage 7 a few times but I am not sure. But I do get what you mean by the absolute boredom after a while.. it seems to happen to a lot of people. Something happens in their life, then they do all these stuff to feel better (or clean up) and once they have cleaned up enough.. it just falls off

(30 May '15, 05:33) kakaboo
showing 2 of 8 show 6 more comments

Kakaboo, whenever you find pondering questions such as this, try to look at it first from the 'souls' perspective. It is there that you will find the simple answers to all such questions. Remember that you are first a soul, a conscious 'energy essence personality', a unique being existing amongst trillions upon trillions of other such beings. From the souls perspective, there are no races, no nationalities; there are no "aliens". There are only other souls (in whatever form). From a souls perspective, existence is elegant and simple. I Am. I exist. I will always exist. I change. I create. I become.

At this particular moment in your never-ending existence, you have chosen to (temporarily) 'clothe' yourself in flesh as a human being. I cannot say with any certainty (as I am human), but I am certain that souls do not expend too much energy contemplating the existential questions that humans do. Our questions, doubts, fears and such are rooted in and emerge into consciousness through the machinations of a complex but rather limited physical brain. In short, we tend to over think things, which can often lead to confusion, doubt and additional questions.

Now there are some who will advise you to just 'listen to your soul, listen to the higher self. You are your soul. You are your higher self. The being you refer to when you utter the words I Am is all that you are, soul, higher self and human being. Together you are the one and only creator of the reality, that you perceive. From the souls 'simple' perspective, there are thoughts. Repeated thoughts become beliefs. Your thoughts, your beliefs react with the "universal" or "source" (if you prefer) energy that is all that is. Thought then manifests into what you experience as reality. That reality may be joyful or miserable or anything in between. What you put out is what you get back. The "universe" has no say in the matter. It simply reacts to your input. The actual "physics" of this reaction is being studied by scientific minds exploring quantum mechanics and metaphysical minds exploring the Law of Attraction. I am sure you are aware of these things to some degree.

So to answer your question from what might be a 'souls' perspective, I would suggest you consider the following.

You begin by expressing a core belief, which you may or may not have actually adopted at this point in your life. It is the belief that:

In order for you to change your life, the first step you would need to do is to first accept where you currently are and then take it from there. This is followed by a secondary belief that states: This acceptance might backfire at times and people might end up taking advantage of you.

As you are probably aware, all beliefs are valid. There are no right or wrong beliefs. You are free to choose whatever beliefs you like and free to define those beliefs as well. Once adopted, those beliefs will react with the energy of all that is and manifest themselves into the things and events in your life. Personally, I would advise against adopting either of these beliefs, as I can see no positive benefits from holding on to them. They certainly are not essential to a joyful life, afterlife, future life, or any other aspect of your existence. Let me break it down for you.

'In order for you to change your life'...your life is in a constant state of change regardless. You do not need to accept where you're at, who you are, where you're headed or where you've been for change to occur. You only need to change your beliefs. Change your way of thinking about life and your life and changes will follow. That is the simple nature of reality. This is not to say that executing said changes is by any means easy. Figuring out which beliefs are positive, beneficial and allowing and which ones are negative, limiting and resisting is a major chore. Potential 'new' beliefs need to be carefully dissected before the choice is made to adopt them.

'The first step you would need to do is to first accept where you currently are.' This belief could get messy. Think about it. First, you will have to define what you mean by "accept". Then you are going to have to figure out "where you currently are". This is not difficult for those who learn to 'live in the moment'. I may be wrong but your inquiry would seem to indicate that you might be spending much of your "now" reflecting on the past and projecting into the future. In reality, accepting where you are is a given or you wouldn't be there in the first place. No belief to that affect is necessary.

If you do choose to adopt the first part of this non-essential belief, you certainly will want to avoid tacking on the second part. You would find it more beneficial to change the belief to read:

In order for you to change your life, the first step you would need to do is to first accept where you currently are and then take it from there. People will see this as an indication of good character. They will respect me because of it and will take any opportunity they can to assist me at work.

This equally valid belief will prove to be more beneficial. However, as I said earlier, this belief is neither essential nor necessary to your progress through life. The choice is yours.

P.S. Get a little refrigerator and keep your snacks locked up in your room. Your roommate will get over it!


answered 28 May '15, 13:35

i4cim2b's gravatar image


@i4cim2b well i dont have a roommate , it was just an example :)

(28 May '15, 22:16) kakaboo

correctness may be in the
eyes of the beholder, when
shoulds get replaced by action,
or heart is right with the world


answered 26 May '15, 06:19

fred's gravatar image


Here is some food for thought...

The nature of your higher self is unbounded joy and appreciation. I think we all agree on that much.

You on the other hand have a whole host of likes, dislikes and preferences. This is also a given - nothing controversial.

According to LOA, it's your higher self that gets you what you ask for.

So what's your higher self's interest in giving you what you want? All experiences are equally joyful to it. Whether your flatmates eat all your snacks or they share everything with you - is the same to the higher self. It's jumping in joy either way.

So why should your higher self go out of its way to give you what YOU want? What's in it for it?


answered 26 May '15, 06:42

cod2's gravatar image


edited 26 May '15, 06:42

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